The Storm
by Artemis225
Summary: Alandra has just become part of the Scooby Gang and becomes friends with Angel while he trains her on how to fight. How will Angelus take advantage of this friendship when he returns? And what is the prophecy that will change Alandra's life forever?
1. Chapter 1

"Hey Angel," Alandra called softly as the Scoobies; Xander, Willow, sometimes Angel, and now Alandra, made their way back to the Library. Buffy had left for the summer, and the rest of the gang had to take up the mantle of being the protectors of Sunnydale.

Angel smiled softly at her, "Hey Alandra, how are you?"

"I'm good. I just had a quick question for you," Alandra asked, her heart thumping hard against her chest. Angel wasn't her friend, but he was definitely someone she could trust. Angel saw the nervous expression on her face, could hear her blood pump through her body. He pushed down the images of biting into her and focused on her eyes. They were dark grey, like a calming storm that could swirl with a fury at a moment's notice.

"What's your question," Angel prompted when it took the young woman a moment to speak. Alandra took a deep breath before looking into Angel's eyes, making sure that she had his full attention.

"I was wondering if you would teach me how to fight," Alandra said quickly. Angel was surprised. Of all the questions he was expecting, that wasn't one of them. At his shocked look and silence she continued on, "It's just that, I feel useless just standing there basically waiting to be attacked. Waiting to slip up and get drained or have to rely on you to come and save me when things don't go as planned. Which they never do. But if you can't or don't want to then that's ok. I just figured you would be the best person to help me since you're so old."

Alandra gasps at her last words, covering her mouth with her hands, her eyes wide with shock and embarrassment. Angel didn't smile, but she could see an amused glint in his eyes.

"I don't mind teaching you Alandra," Angel reassured her. Alandra released the breath she had been holding in a relieved sigh.

"Thank you Angel, I really appreciate it. I'll get you blood to pay you back," Alandra offered, once again shocking the vampire, "Or I could just pay you."

"No, that won't be necessary," Angel began, "When do you want to start?"

"Well since school is starting the day after tomorrow, how about Wednesday after I get out of class? Unless that's too early for you," Alandra asked nervously. She never knew how to act around Angel. He looked young, but the way he carried himself demanded a certain amount of respect. A demand that no one else but her actually tried to comply.

"No that's fine. Just be prepare for a workout and we'll start right away," he told her, his calming voice once again reassuring her. She smiled brightly at him, and Angel nearly smiled back at her. All he could allow himself to give her was a small quirk of lips. Alandra wanted to laugh at the expression, but decided better against it.

"Great! I'll see you then! I'm going to head home, good night," Alandra said before grabbing her things from the table and heading out of the room. She didn't notice Angel as he followed her home to make sure she was safe.

~0~0~

Alandra hesitantly entered Angel's apartment, a duffle bag shrugged onto her shoulder. It was small, but she immediately felt at peace as she stepped into the living room. Angel could hear the door open from the bathroom, Alandra's scent hitting him instantly. He stepped out from the bathroom, seeing her looking around, a small smile on her face.

"You're five minutes late," Angel said, making her jump into the air. His demon got a kick out of the small spike of fear that Alandra's scent held.

Her hand was clutching her heart as she whirled around to face him, "Jeez! Warn a girl first before you just pop up out of nowhere."

"The bathroom is back there, that's where you can change," Angel said, ignoring her earlier words. Alandra frowned slightly, but took it all in stride. She began to take a step towards the direction he pointed when she paused and began rummaging through her duffel bag.

"Mind if I put this in your fridge," she asked, pulling out multiple bags filled with vegetables and fruits. Angle nodded, getting a light whiff of blood coming off of her as she stepped past him to place everything in the refrigerator. Alandra remained silent as she placed her snacks and bottle of water in the fridge before placing five large bags of blood in it as well.

"I told you that wasn't necessary Alandra," Angel began, but Alandra quickly cut him off.

"I didn't do it out of necessity. I wanted to do it as thanks. You don't have to do this, but you are and I appreciate it. So just take the damn blood and be happy," Alandra said, smiling brightly at Angel to show she was just joking. Angel just nodded, saying nothing else. Deep down he was surprised at her actions. While the other Scoobies took him in stride, none of the actually seemed to have accepted what he was, a vampire. None except for her.

"I'll go on back to change and then we can start," Alandra announced before making a beeline to the bathroom. Angel moved some furniture out of the way to give them more room before beginning his Tai Chi exercises.

It wasn't long before Alandra came out to join him, but she stood off to the side, watching him go from move to move. Angel could tell that she was absorbing every move he did in her mind. He finished his set in silence, thankful that Alandra knew that it was best to keep quiet.

"What I just did was called Tai Chi. It's a Chinese Martial art that helps ground your mind and center your body, a form of meditation. But it also strengthens your body and teaches you how to use your opponents energy against them. So every lesson we'll start by doing an hour of Tai chi before moving into a half hour of strength training then finish off with hand to hand," Angel explained to her.

Alandra gulped, her eyes wide, suddenly feeling over whelmed, "That's a lot. I don't know if I can do all of that."

"You'll never be as strong as a vampire or Slayer, but I can at least help you build up enough strength to survive a fight. You can do it, you just need to have faith in yourself," Angel said, looking her in the eye. He could see the hesitation, but he could also see the moment she made her decision. Alandra nodded strongly before standing beside him and starting their first lesson.

~0~0~

Alandra was sore. She had never been so sore or tired in her entire life, but she couldn't help feel happy as well. It had only been about a week of training, but she already felt stronger and faster. She was trying to relax at the Bronze, allowing her mind to take a break and just enjoy watching people and seeing their interactions when she saw Willow, sitting by herself, a sad look on her face.

Alandra followed the gaze of Willow to the dance floor, seeing Buffy and Xander dance sensually. Alandra immediately shot to her feet at the sight, making her way to Willow. Willow had always had a crush on Xander, and seeing her look so sad at what Buffy and Xander were doing made Alandra angry for her.

"Hey Willow," Alandra said cheerfully, hiding the anger she felt deep within her. The other girl looked up and smiled at her, but it was sad and full of pain.

"Hey Alandra, what's up," Willow asked, trying to sound happy but failing.

"Nothing, I just suddenly became bored and was wondering if you were heading home? And if you needed a walking buddy," Alandra told her. They both knew what she was doing. She was giving Willow an out and avoid what her best friends were doing on the dance floor. A way to get out of there and wait till tomorrow to deal with her problems.

"No, that's ok," Willow said, her smile a little bit less sad this time. Alandra nodded when she looked back out on the dance floor. Buffy had walked away from a now dejected Xander and was now speaking heatedly to Angel. She didn't hear the words, but seeing Buffy look smug as she walked away from Angel to the front door pushed Alandra to follow her. Angel had noticed Alandra's angry look and quickly went to go and intercept her.

"Alandra, leave it alone," Angel told her. Alandra wanted to listen but she continued on her stomp towards the door anyway. If a fight broke out, Buffy would win, but Alandra couldn't see past her own anger at what the blonde was doing to her friends.

"Alandra, she's been through a lot. Let it go," Angel tried again. He thought he had succeeded as Alandra came to a halt, but he knew he hadn't when he was faced with her angry glare.

"Yea, well so have I, but you don't see me destroying people's feelings because it makes me feel better," Alandra hissed before turning away from Angel, stepping through the doors to the outside alley of the Bronze.

There was a light breeze to cool Alandra's heated skin, and it calmed her a little but it was too late to stop.

"Hey Buffy," Alandra called, making the other girl turn towards her. Buffy held a dejected look on her face, but Alandra refused to let herself back down.

"Not now Alandra. I'm not in the mood," Buffy told her, a command held in her voice.

"I don't care. You're going to listen, and you're going to listen good," Alandra began, taking a few steps towards Buffy till they were nearly chest to chest, "Get over it. What ever messed you up so badly that you're ok with breaking your only friends' hearts, you need to get over it."

"What do you know," Buffy asked, sarcasm and anger thick in her voice, "All you're good for is telling us what the latest fashion is. You, Cordelia, Harmony, you're all the same. You're pointless." It wasn't the first time Alandra had heard those words, and she knew it wouldn't be the last, but they hurt all the same. She refused to let Buffy see how much those words got to her though.

"You're right Buffy. There isn't a point to me. But there's a point to them, and you need them. Don't throw that away," Alandra finished. Buffy scoffed before turning on her heel and disappearing down the alley way. All Alandra could do was watch her walk away. No tears fell, but she felt her pain all the same.

"She's wrong you know," Angel said, stepping out from the shadows and standing beside his pupil, his friend, "You're not pointless." Alandra smiled sadly up at him, used to his expressionless face now.

"She isn't," Alandra told him, her voice quiet, "But I appreciate you saying that all the same. I'm going to head home."

"Let me walk you home," Angel said. Alandra was silent for a moment, debating on whether to let him. She knew he would follow her home either way, but she wasn't sure if she wanted his presence beside her or not.

"Sure," Alandra finally replied, and was thankful for his silent and calming presence as her mind sorted through her thoughts.

**A/N: Look, I know I'm a horrible person for doing this. One of my goals this year is to finish all my incomplete stories. But for right now this is the story that I've been working on, and it's the story I've been working the hardest on, so please forgive me and I hope you enjoy it!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Hey Angel," Alandra said as she stepped into what had become her second home. She didn't notice the couple kissing on the couch as she stepped into the kitchen, moving around and restocking the fridge of blood and snacks. It had been months since she had begun her training with him, the two becoming closer and closer with each lesson. He had become her best friend.

"Alandra," his shocked voice brought her attention to him. Buffy was wrapped around him, her lips puffy and hair mussed. Clear signs of kissing. Clear signs of very intense kissing. Alandra couldn't help but suddenly feel hurt, and she knew it had shown on her face by the way Angel jumped from his spot beside Buffy.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt," Alandra said, not looking at Buffy at all, "I'll just head out and I'll call you before I head over tomorrow."

"Sounds good," Buffy said cheerfully, a bright smile on her face, but it instantly fell when Angel turned towards her with a glare before looking back at Alandra with an expressionless face.

"That's ok Alandra. Just head to the back to change and then we can start," Angel told her, but he could see the hesitation.

"It's fine Angel, I'll just," she began.

"Head to the back to change," he said, finishing her sentence for her.

"Do you mind if I stay and join," Buffy asked Angel, completely ignoring Alandra.

"Do you mind Alandra," Angel asked her, his eyes full of worry. She tried her best to smile brightly, but she knew it fell short.

"That's fine! It'll be fun to have another girl in the mix," Alandra said to him before making her way to the back to change. She was very aware of how that sentence sounded, but she couldn't bring herself to feel embarrassed by it as she usually would have.

When she came back out the couple was whispering harshly to each other, but their words were too quiet for her to hear. Buffy noticed her first, fixing Alandra with an angry glare. Angel looked up next, and Alandra couldn't help but feel safe. He didn't smile, he didn't nod. He just looked her in the eye and she felt at peace. All of her thoughts stilled and her mind was alert.

"Let's warm up with some Tai Chi then we can go into some hand to hand and maybe some weapons," Angel said to them. Alandra perked up at the word weapons.

"Oh! Can I learn how to use a katana? Or, or maybe an axe! Or, oh, a staff! Staffs are cool," Alandra said. Her entire being hummed with excitement at the prospect at being taught how to use weapons. She had been begging him for weeks to teach her anything, but he had been unmoved until now.

"We'll see," he replied, his voice sounding amused. Buffy seemed irritated by the fact that she wasn't included in the conversation and quickly imbedded herself.

"We should get started," Buffy told them, moving to the middle of the room, settling her body into a starting position of Tai Chi. Angel and Alandra followed her, Angel in the center, starting the set of moves. The air was thick with sweat and tension, and Alandra couldn't help but begin to think about Angel and his relationship with Buffy. Alandra liked Buffy, even if Buffy didn't like her, and she wondered if Buffy was good for him. Angel sometimes would be more light hearted and he seemed almost happy, and Alandra knew that was due to Buffy. But then he would fall deeply into his thoughts, especially during their warm ups, and he would be in a dark mood till she left for the day. She sometimes wished she could know what he was thinking, but always decided against it. She may consider him her best friend, but she wasn't sure if he considered her his, and would wait till he felt comfortable enough to open up to her. To trust her enough with his thoughts.

Alandra was so deep in her thoughts she didn't realize that Angel and Buffy had stopped and were waiting for her.

"Ready for some hand to hand Alandra," Angel asked her softly as she finished her set. She nodded, her mood improving now that she had time to think.

"You've been training with Angel for a few months now right," Buffy asked her. Alandra nodded in affirmation, but she was nervous about where this was going.

"What do you think of taking me on? Just a small bout, nothing too serious," Buffy asked, her demeanor seemingly innocent and helpful, but Alandra could hear the challenge.

"I don't think that's a good idea," Angel began, worry on his face, but Alandra refused to back down.

"No, it's ok Angel," Alandra said, this time cutting him off. His brows furrowed in concern or anger she wasn't sure, but he definitely seemed unhappy.

"You need more training before you can go up against a Slayer Alandra," Angel told her, his tone low and dark. Alandra nearly gulped in fear, but she held her ground.

"We're just having a small thing Angel. Besides, I nearly beat you yesterday," Alandra said to him. He stepped towards her, his tall frame hovering over her. He only did that when he was angry and wanted her to listen to him.

"Nearly isn't good enough right now," Angel replied. Alandra crossed her arms, a single brow cocked up in defiance.

"Angel, it's fine," Buffy said, cutting in between them. Angel looked down at her, seeing the small smile on her face, "I'll go easy on her. I won't break anything." Angel's face was expressionless and he showed no amusement towards Buffy's joke. He looked at Alandra, searching in her eyes for any hesitation, but he found none. He backed away from the center of the living room and went to go grab the mats he had for the floor. He came back quickly, and as soon as he placed them down, nervousness seeped into her.

She stepped onto the mat, lowering her body to a fighting stance like Angel had taught her. Buffy did the same, a smirk on her face. Alandra was already trying to calculate her moves. Buffy was short, so she would try to hit low. So Alandra would have to try to use speed to her advantage, since strength was totally out of the question.

Buffy started coming after her with punch after punch with Alandra barely quick enough to block them. Alandra dropped down to the ground to escape the onslaught, using her legs to kick Buffy's feet out from under her. The slayer fell with a small thump, but quickly recovered. Alandra used her new found space to attack Buffy with a set of kicks in quick succession, but Buffy was able to easily block them.

Alandra dropped to her knees, using her arms to propel her forward and slid on the mat. She grabbed Buffy quickly by the knees and used all of her strength and weight to drop the other girl on the mat. The thump was louder this time as Buffy landed on her back. Alandra rolled away from her, quickly getting up and getting back into a low fighting stance.

"I let you do that," Buffy snarked, an angry smile on her face.

"Keep telling yourself that," Alandra replied, but she was out of breath and beginning to tire. Angel remained on the sidelines, his arms crossing his broad chest, his eyes taking in every move. He could see Alandra begin to tire, but knew she could go for longer if she had to. He didn't want it to get to that point though.

Buffy came at her again, but before Alandra could do anything Buffy had her by her waist and threw Alandra over her shoulder. Alandra cried out in pain as she landed on her own shoulder nearly half way across the room.

"Alandra," Angel cried, but his voice sounded a million miles away to her. She cried out again in pain as Angel gently tried to help her sit up.

"Her shoulder is dislocated," Angel told Buffy, his voice full of anger. Alandra could see yellow flash under brown.

"I am so sorry," Buffy said, her voice making Alandra look at her through her tears. Buffy looked genuinely apologetic and worried, but all Alandra could fully compute was the pain she was feeling.

"I am going to have to pop it back into place," Angel told her softly, his touch gentle and soft as he placed both hands on either side of her injury.

"Just do it," Alandra hissed at him. Tears were streaming down her face, and the rest of her body felt like it was on fire and was beginning to shake from shock.

"On the count of three," Angel said to her in a soft voice, trying to soothe her. All Alandra could bring herself to do was nod.

"One," Angel said before snapping the shoulder quickly back into place. Alandra screamed in pain, openly crying in front of both of them. Soon the pain subsided to a sharp ache and wasn't as excruciating as before. She was to scared to move an inch for fear of the pain coming back though.

"I knew you were going to fucking do that," Alandra said in a hoarse voice. Her chest was heaving, completely out of breath but she smiled up at Angel to soften her words. Angel gave her a small smile back before turning an angry glare to Buffy.

"I think you should leave Buffy," he told her in a cold voice. Tears were beginning to well in Buffy's eyes.

"But," Buffy began but Angel quickly cut her off.

"Leave Buffy," he said, "Now." Alandra could see Buffy's lower lip tremble, a single tear falling down her face. The entire apartment was quiet, not even a quiet groan of furniture could be heard as they waited for Buffy's next move. Alandra almost felt like she was encroaching in on a private moment as the couple looked at each other. She could feel the anger emanate off of Angel, and she began to feel guilty for everything now.

"I'll talk to you later," Buffy finally said. Angel remained silent and turned back to Alandra, using his hands to gently palpate around her shoulder to make sure it was back in place properly. Buffy took a deep breath, her face crumpling into a mask of sadness. She said nothing to Alandra as she turned around, grabbed her bag and left the apartment. Angel and Alandra remained in silence as he walked around, putting the mats away and putting the living room back the way it was.

"I should start heading home," Alandra said, beginning to stand up, but Angel nearly stomped over to her.

"You're going to sit and relax for a few moments," Angel told her. She could tell by the tone of his voice that he was beyond angry with her. He had turned away from her, facing her with his tense shoulders and back to finish clearing up the living room.

"I'm sorry," Alandra whispered. She felt so small, seeing the disappointment in his eyes. He whirled around, his eyes flashing with anger, disappointment, and what looked like hurt.

"There is reason why I tell you to do things when it comes to your training Alandra. I thought you trusted me enough to trust my judgment," Angel said.

"I do trust you! I trust you with my life," Alandra cried before hissing in pain from moving to quickly.

"Then why didn't you listen to me," Angel asked. He moved down to his knee in front of her, now making them eye to eye.

"Because I wanted to prove to myself that I was making progress. That I could fight and do it well," Alandra explained. Angel's eyes widened slightly before moving back into his usual expressionless mask.

"I could have told you that you were improving Alandra," Angel said softly.

"It's not that I didn't know I had improved. I just wanted to see how far I had come," she finished lamely. Her thumbs were worrying the hem of her shirt, now realizing how ridiculous everything was. And how she might have damaged their relationship.

"Maybe we shouldn't do this anymore," Alandra said. Angel looked up at her sharply, his own eyes having wandered to her hand worrying her shirt hem.

"Wait, what?"

"I need to focus on school and you have Buffy now. I don't want to get in between that," Alandra said. Her voice was thick with emotion, and she could feel her heart breaking.

"You're not getting in between me and Buffy," Angel told her, but she knew that wasn't true. She gave him a sardonic smile.

"I think today was proof enough of how much that isn't true. Besides, my grades are slipping any way. She requires your attention and school requires mine. She's the first girl you've ever fallen in love with, you should focus on that and enjoy it," Alandra said. Her sardonic smile became genuine, if not sad, one.

"I can focus on the both of you. We don't have to give this up," Angel said. His hand had somehow grabbed onto hers at some point and he was now clutching it tightly, his thumb rubbing circles into the skin. It was almost as if she were breaking up with him. In a way she was. She was breaking their routine, what they looked forward to each day. She could see the sadness in his eyes, and the loneliness begin to settle in, but his face remained expressionless. She had taught herself how to understand him. It was all in his eyes. That was the only way to read his emotions, and even then it was only if he let you. But no matter how much she wanted to continue on with her training sessions, something deep in her gut was telling her to do this. That she was doing the right thing.

"It's getting late, I should be heading home," Alandra said, ignoring the sharp pain in her shoulder as she stood up. Angel backed away before standing up. She grabbed her bag and refused to let tears come as she headed for the door. When she opened the front door she looked back and noticed Angel hadn't moved at all, but he was looking down at his hands.

"Hey Angel," Alandra called softly, making the vampire look up at her. She smiled brightly at him, even though tears were beginning to fill her eyes, "Thank you." She closed the door behind her before he could reply.


	3. Chapter 3

Alandra had closed in on herself. She stayed away from the Scoobies and Buffy for fear of seeing Angel. The few friends she had hung out with before no longer bothered pretending anymore, and she was happy about it actually. Life was too short in Sunnydale for her to waste it on people that weren't really her friends. People that didn't care about her in the slightest. She hadn't realized what having a true friend felt like till she began training with Angel, and she was missing him desperately.

She didn't help out on patrols anymore, or with research, and other than the occasional chats with Willow and Cordelia, Alandra hardly spoke to anyone. Sometimes she would wake up, tears wanting to fall free, because she felt so alone, and would wish that Angel was there to help soothe her hurt. But as soon as Angel's face would appear in her mind, something deep down inside her reassure her, would tell her that she was doing the right thing. That Angel needed to have his time with Buffy for some reason. Alandra just didn't know for what. Other than the obvious of him needing to experience love for the first time, but even with the reassurance her heart would ache for his friendship. So then she would get up and go through the Tai Chi Angel had taught her.

She still trained every day. She tried to hone the little skill she had gained and made sure that she had perfected her kicks and punches. She continued to get stronger and could see the definition of muscles in her arms and legs. She had come far from the girl that would cower in fear at the distorted face of a vampire.

All of these thoughts were running through Alandra's mind as she stepped onto the school campus before the bright red lettering of a sign that read "Parent's Night" on the front of the school caught her attention. She internalized the groan that fought to escape her throat as she realized what day it was. She had been so wrapped up in everything she hadn't remembered to tell her father.

"Hey Alandra," Willow's cheerful voice called to her as her and Xander walked up the steps. She smiled back, but it didn't fully reach her eyes. She glanced over at Xander and saw the glare he directed her way.

"How goes everything," Willow asked once they reached her. Alandra tried her best to ignore the seething that seemed to roll off of Xander in waves.

"Ok I guess, I forgot to tell my dad about Parent's Night. I'm tempted to just blow it off, but I know Snyder would find a way to punish me for it," Alandra said. She blew out a frustrated breath, using a hand to push back her curly hair away from her face.

"Isn't it great to have the ability to just abandon something? I think I would love to be able to do that," Xander snarked. Alandra's back straightened her back, her eyes wide as she looked at him. She wasn't completely sure of where that came from, but she could guess it had something to do with her not helping the Scoobies anymore.

"Xander," Willow cried, "You can't just say things like that without knowing the whole story!"

"Buffy told us the whole story," Xander defended before fixing Alandra with an angry glare.

"You have to hear both sides before just making assumptions," Willow replied. Alandra had no clue what was going on, or what Buffy had told them.

"What the hell are you guys talking about," Alandra finally asked, her anger beginning to fill her.

"Buffy told us what you did," Xander told her. This confused Alandra even more.

"What exactly did I do Harris," Alandra hissed. She crossed her arms in front of her chest, trying to wait patiently for him to answer.

"You didn't do anything Alandra," Willow cut in as Xander opened his mouth to answer. Willow glared at Xander before continuing on, "Don't worry about it."

"What did she _say _Willow," Alandra asked. Her voice was dark, her body beginning to shake with her fury.

"She said that you tried to steal Angel from her. And then you seemed to have magically disappeared. Guess you were too good for us, huh Alandra," Xander said, sarcasm thick in voice at the end. Alandra's eyes widened and could feel angry tears wanting to escape.

"She did _not _say that Xander! She said she was worried that Angel cared for Alandra more than her. Don't talk about things you weren't even there for," Willow chided before she realized what she had said. Willow turned to Alandra, a placating and guilty look on her face. Willow opened her mouth to speak, but Alandra beat her to it.

"Angel is-_was_ my friend," Alandra began, "If Buffy doesn't feel secure in their relationship then that's on them to fix it. I left because I wanted Angel to focus on Buffy. I left so that my friend didn't have to worry about _me_ and put all of his effort on _her_. I left so I could get my own priorities straight. I'm sorry if that doesn't jive with your morals Harris, but there it is." Alandra finished, her breath heaving from the exertion of trying not to yell and trying to get her anger under control. She didn't notice till she finished that tears had begun to stream down her face. She wiped them away forcefully and backed away from the duo.

"I need to get to my locker before class starts," Alandra said, her voice quiet, all of her anger escaping and turning into sadness and hurt. She quickly turned on her heel and ran into the school and headed towards the closest girl's restroom. She quickly checked to make sure she was alone before closing the door and locking it behind her. The tears fell freely as she rested her back against the door, sliding down to the floor in a crumpled heap. She couldn't stop her body from sobbing, and it was one of the many moments she wished she could talk to Angel. Angel had always know what to say to make her feel better.

~0~0~

Night had fallen and Alandra had been successful in avoiding the Scoobies and Buffy all day. Principal Snyder had caught her at one point and had told he would make a point to see her that night and hoped to meet her father. Now she knew she had to stay, even if her father might not come.

Now she was standing in the center part of the building, sitting on one of the many chairs that had been set out for the students and parents that would be there that night. She knew Buffy had been the one to decorate everything by herself and was able to feel only a mild respect for the other girl.

As the time ticked by, and Alandra was stuck parent-watching, seeing how they interacted with each other and their kids. Some were loving and open, while others were distant and seemed to ignore their child for conversation with another adult. She surprised to see her father walk in through the front doors of the school, his tall frame seemingly overshadowing every one else. When his eyes landed on her his smile brightened, and she couldn't help but feel happy. Alandra stood and immediately made her way over to him, wrapping him in a long and hard hug.

"I wasn't sure you knew what tonight was. I meant to call you, but things had been rough these past few weeks. I'm glad you came," Alandra said, sighing in content as her father wrapped his arms around her.

"I get the mail at my place, remember," he told her, making Alandra smile radiantly up at him.

"I'll go show you to the punch bowl so we can get some snacks," Alandra said, excitement clear on her face. Her father allowed her to drag him to the table, not seeing Buffy there with her mother and Principal Snyder who were already conversing. Principal Snyder's face lit up as Alandra walked over, a sleazy smile on his face.

"You must be Alandra's father," Snyder said as they stepped towards the table. Alandra sighted, making her father give her an amused glance.

"Yes, you must be Principal Snyder. I'm Logan Brickman," Alandra's father said, shaking Snyder's hand before turning to Buffy's mother and doing the same thing.

"I'm Joyce Summers, and this is my daughter Buffy. I believe our daughters are classmates," Joyce told him, a bright smile on his face.

"It's nice to meet you Mrs. Summers, Buffy," Alandra's father said, quickly shaking Buffy's hand, "And I do believe you are correct."

"Call me Joyce, please," Joyce said, her smile getting bigger. Her father always had that affect on people. Alandra just watched the exchange, feeling Buffy's eyes on her and trying her hardest to ignore her. Xander's words came flooding back to her from earlier that day.

_Isn't it great to have the ability to just abandon something?_

_Guess you were too good for us, huh Alandra?_

Alandra lightly shook her head, forcing the thoughts away and placed a light hand on her father's arm to get his attention.

"Do you mind if I show you around the school? The night's almost over and I wanted to give you a small tour," Alandra asked, smiling at Joyce in apology for interrupting their conversation.

"Of course! We shouldn't keep you two," Joyce said. Alandra was thankful for the older woman and dragged her father along behind her to begin to lead out from the main lounge area.

Her tour was short. She mostly wanted to get away from Buffy's piercing eyes. She tried to be cheerful as she spoke to him about classes and homework, but she sounded flat even to her ears.

"What's wrong pumpkin," her father asked, "You seem down." Alandra hesitated, wondering how much she should tell him, or even whether or not to tell the truth. But his understanding gaze always prompted her to tell him her thoughts and feelings. A lot like Angel.

"I made a friend a few months ago," Alandra began, slowing down her gait as they made their way back to the front of the school, "His name is Angel. We had gotten pretty close, always hanging out. He's a martial arts expert, so I had asked him to train me."

"Is he your boyfriend," her father asked, cutting off her next words. She smiled at him, the question cheering her up a little bit. Every guy she spoke about somehow ended up being her boyfriend in her father's eyes.

"No, Daddy, he's not my boyfriend. Just my best friend."

"Then what's wrong," he asked. Alandra hesitated again, stopping in her tracks to taking a deep breath and calm her nerves.

"He's started seeing someone. He loves her, and I had come to the realization that he can't be my friend and be her boyfriend at the same time," Alandra explained.

"Why the hell not," her father asked, indignant on her behalf. She had missed him a lot. That's when she began to wonder how much else to say to him. She knew that the moment he found out about vampires, he would want to take her back to LA. But even despite being alone in Sunnydale, it had quickly become her home.

"I know you're not here often, but when you are have you noticed anything strange," Alandra asked, looking up at him. They had continued their way to the front where everyone else was. Her father had stopped their steps this time, his large hands landing on her shoulders.

"What's going on Alandra? What aren't you telling me," he asked. Just as she opened her mouth to answer the lights' began to shut off. Alandra and her father looked up at the ceiling, then towards the large crash. A man had smashed himself into the window, and glass was sent flying every where. Alandra could feel her heart begin to race as she the face of the man. It was distorted, large ridges lining his forehead, his eyes a bright yellow.

Everyone had began to scream and Alandra noticed Buffy and her mother run in the direction away from the action. Alandra grabbed her father's hand, dragging him behind her. When she reached an arch way she looked back to see a small army of vampires with a bleach blonde one at the front, a cruel smile on his face. As soon as his eyes landed on her she began to run again, taking her father to the Library. She wasn't surprised to see a group of people already there, but most of them were to shocked and afraid to do anything to keep the vampires out.

"We need to block the doors," Alandra said to her father once she made sure that no one else was behind them. Her father nodded before looking at the rag tag group of adults.

"Help me move this table and chairs block the doors," her father said, his booming voice silencing everyone and moving into action. Alandra and everyone else helped, including Xander, Giles the school Librarian, and Ms. Calendar the computer science teacher.

"Spike seems to have invaded the school," Giles said in his calm British manner, "Where's Buffy," he asked her.

"She ran down a hall with her mother, Snyder and a few other parents. I don't know where though," Alandra said.

"You know what happened to those people, don't you Alandra," her father said. Alandra simply nodded.

"I'll explain everything later, I promise," Alandra said, "But all I need you to focus on is staying alive. If one of them gets in here, make a wooden stake and stab them in the heart."

"What? I don't understand," her father said before opening his mouth to say something else but Alandra stopped him.

"It has to be the heart Daddy. You can't kill them otherwise," Alandra said. Her voice was strong and commanding. Her father looked at her for what felt like forever, but she kept her stance.

"Alright. But I expect a full explanation later young lady," her father replied, a small smile on his face. Alandra smiled back before heading to the cage. Giles and Xander followed her, the keys to open the weapons cabinet jingling in Giles' hand.

"We need to get these people out of here," Alandra whispered harshly, watching as some of the adults began to break down and cry. Some were even too shocked to cry, just sitting in a corner somewhere, or denying everything.

"Buffy will get us out," Xander said, his voice full of hope and belief. He didn't catch the glance Giles and Alandra gave each other.

"One of us needs to go out and find Angel," Alandra said.

"I agree," Giles said in a sigh, taking his glasses off and pinching the bridge of his nose, "Xander. You go and find Angel. We need him here to help Buffy."

"Why do I need to go out and find dead boy," Xander asked, but Alandra knew it was more for show than anything.

"I'll go with you," Alandra said, grabbing a few stakes and holy water before heading back out to her father. He held himself calmly, but Alandra could see the fear and anger in the lines of his face.

"Daddy," Alandra began, making him look at her, "You remember my friend I was telling you about?" He nodded, so she continued on, "He can help us, but someone needs to go out and find him."

"The hell you are going out there," Alandra's father said, his voice booming and making everyone fall silent and look in their direction.

"I have to. If I don't a bunch of more people are going to get hurt and killed. Xander and I are the only people that can do it right now. I _have _to do this Daddy," Alandra said. Her voice was nearly pleading at the end. Pleading for him to understand. Because no matter what she was going out to do it. He was silent as he watched her again, his eyes roaming over her face, as if he were trying to memorize her. She felt the air leave her as he wrapped her in a large hug, his arms squeezing her tightly. Alandra closed her eyes before wrapping her arms around him, hoping beyond all hope that both of them will survive this. She pulled away after a few moments, taking in a deep breath and smiling up at him. Her father didn't smile back this time.

"I'll be back, and then you owe me ice cream," Alandra said.

"Deal," he replied, nodding at her. Alandra handed him a stake and some holy water, telling him to throw it at the men if they try to get in, before heading back over to Giles and Xander.

"Giles," Alandra began, waiting for the British man to look at her, "Watch my dad and make sure he doesn't try to do something stupid."

"Of course Alandra," Giles said, his calm voice assuring her. Alandra nodded at him before turning Xander.

"Let's go," she said before heading to the back window and helping Xander open the grate covering and moving out into the cool night air. She wasn't expecting to bump straight into Angel.


	4. Chapter 4

"Angel," Alandra cried in shock and happiness. Her heart was beating hard against her chest, the panic of having potentially being caught by another vampire leaving her as she looked at Angel's face. She was glad it had been so easy to find him, a large smile gracing her features. Angel gave her a small smile in return before melding back into his usual expressionless mask.

"Well that was easy," Xander said under his breath, but Alandra and Angel ignored him.

"Alandra, you're going to go back to the Library," Angel said before looking to Xander, "Xander, you're going to come with me."

"Wait, what," Alandra asked, her happiness vanishing, "What are you going to do?"

"I was going to try to infiltrate Spike's crew. Xander gives me a perfect in," Angel explained, but his voice was distant. Alandra widened her stance, planting her feet into the ground before crossing her arms in front of her chest, a stubborn look settling upon her face.

"I'm not going anywhere," she told him. Angel sighed, knowing she was going to say this, then became frustrated.

"We don't have time for this Alandra," he said, "We need to do this now."

"Well, then take me instead of Xander," she told him. As if the answer was that simple, but Angel knew it wasn't.

"Absolutely not. Spike is evil, and if he finds out about our plan he'll take you and torture you for the fun of it. I will not be putting you in danger like that," Angel told her, standing his own ground. Both of their backs were stiff as they glared at each other, trying to make the other bend to their will.

"Oh, but you're totally willing to let it happen to me," Xander said from the side.

"Shut up Xander," they both said at the same time. Xander waved his arms in frustration but otherwise remained silent.

"I'm the better choice anyway," Alandra continued on, "I actually know to fight and I am good at pretending. I'll also be more unsuspecting because I'm a human girl. And I'm probably safer with you then waiting out here for you two to come back, because that's what I'm going to do if you take Xander instead of me."

Angel was silent as he debated in his head the pros and cons of using Alandra. In his mind there weren't any pros, only cons. The con of her getting hurt or killed, but he knew she was right. Alandra just watched and waited expectantly for his answer, and knew she had won when he sighed again.

"Fine," Angel said, glaring at her before turning to Xander, "Head back to the library, try to find Buffy. Maybe we can stall Spike long enough for her to get the rest of the people out," Angel ordered. Xander nodded before running back to the window they came out of, leaving Alandra alone with him.

Angel said nothing as he started walking towards where Spike was. Alandra was able to easily catch up with him, her adrenaline pumping through her at the prospect of a fight.

"How do you know so much about this Spike guy," Alandra asked. Angel glanced at her, silent, but Alandra knew he had heard her. He was just getting his thoughts in order.

"Spike was made from Drusilla, my own childe," Angel finally said, his voice quiet, "I had driven Drusilla insane before I turned her, then taught Spike everything he knew while I was Angelus." Alandra was quiet, his words rolling over her in her head.

"You must hate me now," Angel said, "I'm a monster." The look on his face was so full of guilt and sadness that it made Alandra want to cry. She even preferred his expressionless mask compared to seeing the pain he seemed to be in right now.

Alandra placed a hand on his arm, stopping him in his tracks, "Angel, I don't hate you. I don't even hate who you used to be. The past is in the past, and I can only base my feelings on who you are today. And today you are a man, well vampire, who is trying to save people he doesn't even know because it's the right thing to do. That ranks pretty high in my book." Before she knew it, Angel held her tightly in a nearly bone crushing hug. Alandra couldn't help but laugh lightly at the rare show of affection and returned it.

"Come on and let's go kick some vampire ass," Alandra said as she pulled away from Angel, already missing the contact. Angel looked down at her, a smile on his face. It was more then he usually gave her, and she couldn't help but smile brightly back at him. Before Alandra could say anything more, Angel's face turned into distorted face of his demon and grabbed Alandra by the back of her neck.

"Do you trust me," he asked, his voice dark and serious.

"Always," she replied honestly. Angel nodded again before dragging her lightly to where Spike was.

~0~0~

"Well look who we have here," Angel said as he nearly smashed through the front doors of the school with Alandra, "Spike, you have certainly out done yourself!" Alandra whimpered in pretend pain, making sure she looked afraid for her life, tears streaming down her face.

"Sire," Spike cried before taking Angel in a quick but hard one armed hug, "It's good to see you mate! And what do we have here?" Spike asked, his British accent thick as he looked down into Alandra's wide and fearful eyes.

"Just some fun for us to have later. And then when we're done with her, we'll have a midnight snack," Angel explained, pulling Alandra by her hair so that she was looking up at him. Her mouth opened in a silent cry of pain.

"Let me have a good look at her," Spike said, his voice sounding like an excited child. Angel complied by using her hair to make Alandra look Spike in the eye. He stared for a long moment, silent as a finger traced her face. He saw the grey swarm in her eyes, reminding him of a storm waiting to be released.

"Never seen eyes like that before," Spike commented. Angel nodded in agreement before pulling Alandra back to him, her body crashing into his. She cried out in pain as he tugged on her scalp.

"Yea, they're something else aren't they," Angel replied, looking down at Alandra with a thoughtful expression, "Hmm, maybe we should have a snack now, and save the rest for later. What do you think?" Angel flipped Alandra's head down so that the back of her neck was facing up towards the ceiling. Her heart was pounding furiously against her chest, and she began to wonder if it could beat all the way through.

"You sure," Spike asked, his tone turning thoughtful, "Especially after I've been hearing some interesting rumors 'bout ya?"

"What have you heard," Angel asked, and Alandra was amazed her heart could pound even harder. She was thankful Spike couldn't see her face.

"That you have a soul," Spike said. She could feel hesitation come from Angel, fear making Alandra squeeze her eyes shut tightly. Her entire body was shaking with true fear now.

"That's ridiculous Spike," Angel said, his voice sounding nonchalant, but she noticed that there was a hint of anger underneath. But she knew that Spike had figured them out the second he had said the word 'soul'. Suddenly she was falling towards the ground towards Angel, her breath leaving her as she landed on top of him. She looked up into the furious yellow eyes of Spike as he glared down at them.

"You thought you could play me," he yelled, one of his fists hitting his chest hard, "One fourth of the Scourge of Europe! You made me into the vampire I am today, and you thought you could play me!" Alandra felt an intense fear pierce her heart, but it wasn't for herself, it was for Angel.

"Throw them out," Spike told his minions before turning his back on them. She wondered why Spike hadn't tried to keep her and torture her or eat her, but decided that she shouldn't question it too much. She didn't struggle as the vampires picked her up, but she glared as they looked at her lasciviously. She grunted in pain as they threw her at Angel, making them fall to the ground again, before walking back inside.

Alandra was out of breath, and was about to get up from her spot on his chest, but his arms wrapped around her, holding her in place. She looked up at him feeling confused, but it fell away at the worried look in his gaze.

"Are you alright," he asked, his voice soft and gentle.

"I'm fine. Are _you _alright," she asked. Angel merely shrugged before starting to get to his feet, lifting her body up with him.

"I'll live," he replied, and Alandra couldn't help but snort at his joke. Alandra had begun to pull away from him, but he kept his arms around her. Her heart had just finished calming down from their exchange with Spike, and now it was racing again. She knew he could hear it which made the situation even more intimate. She couldn't hide from him, but she didn't want to. He was her closest friend.

"Angel," she said, her voice showing her confusion.

"I miss you Alandra," he said. Alandra looked up at him, never having been this close to him before. Her hands were on his chest. And even though she knew it wouldn't, it felt strange to not feel his heart beat beneath her hand.

"I miss you too," she replied. She sounded tired as she sighed and looked up at him, her face full of the sadness she felt, "Nothing has changed."

"It didn't have to be this way."

"Yes it did," she told him, her voice harsh, "Do you love Buffy?"

"Yes," he answered, "But you're my closest friend. It's," he stopped for a moment as he searched for the right word, "It's lonely without you there, nagging my ear about taking better care of myself." He smiled sadly down at her.

"I've been pretty lonely too," Alandra admitted, "But I was becoming too reliant on you Angel. I need to learn how to be alone. We're still friends though, and if you ever needed help with anything, you can always come to me."

"And you know if you need anything _you _can always come to _me_," Angel replied. Alandra smiled up at him, but it didn't quite reach her eyes. Angel lowered his head and gave her a soft kiss on her forehead. It wasn't the first time he had done it, but something about the innocent kiss felt different.

"We should head inside and help the others," Alandra said, finally pulling out of his arms. But she felt empty, knowing she was going back to a lonely life after tonight.

"Let's go find Buffy and the rest of the gang," Angel said before grabbing Alandra's hand and taking her around the back of the school.

~0~0~

"A storm is coming my precious dollies," an soft airy voice said from the shadows of the room in the factory. A woman slowly walked up to the night stand full of porcelain dolls, her dark hair falling in front of her pale face. Her skin looked ghostly white against the dark red velvet empire waisted dress she wore.

"The storm is going to sweep my dark knight and daddy away," the woman said in a pout, "Ms. Ethel won't listen to me. They're both mine, but the stars keep telling me I will have to give them up. They keep shouting at me, always shouting. They tell me they were never mine to begin with." Suddenly she released a small keen before sweeping over to the ornate four poster bed that was draped in silks.

"The stars say that the Storm needs two champions," she whispered, her hand hovering over her face as she looked intently at it, "Or else we'll all be lost at sea."


	5. Chapter 5

Alandra was tired, physically and emotionally. For the rest of the night she had ran around with Angel, trying to find Buffy, fighting vampire minions along the way. They had just made it to where Spike's home base was in the school, and found Buffy fighting Spike with everything she had.

Alandra was in awe over the way Spike moved. Angel was quick with short successive punches and kicks. Spike looked more like a dancer. He easily spun away from the young Slayer, his longs legs making sweeping kicks, his arms easily blocking Buffy's attack. Alandra couldn't help but be jealous of the grace Spike held as he fought.

"Alandra, watch out," Angel called from the side. It wasn't till too late that she had noticed the vampire coming towards her, Angel already locked in a battle.

"Tasty treat," the vampire's deep voice said in a chuckle. Alandra pulled out her stash of holy water and immediately splashed it in his face. The vampire screamed out in pain, his hands clutching at his eyes, his skin bubbling and smoking as the water dripped off his skin. Alandra used his distraction to sweep his legs out from under him, making him fall to the ground hard. Before he could move his hands away to look, Alandra had stabbed him in the chest with the stake. His mouth was opened wide in a silent scream as he faded to dust. Angel had barely just finished staking his own vampire when they looked at the battle between Buffy and Spike.

Spike was gone, leaving Buffy standing in the dark with a fierce look on her face, her body still in fighting stance. Angel ran up to her, leaving Alandra alone on the side.

"I'm glad you're ok," Angel said to Buffy before wrapping her in his arms and bringing his lips down to hers in a fierce kiss. Alandra felt her heart break a little at the sight, so caught up in what she was seeing that she hadn't noticed her father step beside her.

"Is that your friend," her dad asked, startling Alandra out of her thoughts. She glanced to her side, looking at him before turning back to the still embracing couple.

"Yea, his name is Angel," Alandra said.

"What would it take to convince you to come back to LA with me," her father then asked. Alandra remained silent beside him, her silence speaking louder than any words could have.

"I figured as much," he said, amusement in his voice, "You know all you have to do is call and I'll be here right?"

"I know daddy," she said before turning to him and giving him a fierce hug, "Thank you." Her father kissed her on top of her head, taking a deep breath because this would be last time in a while he could see her.

"I love you Alandra," he said, "Be safe and don't do anything stupid." Her father pulled away from her, a sad smile on his face. It was always difficult to see him leave, but she was always thankful of the time they did get to see each other.

"I'll call you later in the week," Alandra told him. He nodded and then walked out the doors to the parking lot. Alandra watched him leave, not seeing Giles now standing beside her.

"You don't live with your father," Giles asked, but he already knew the answer.

"No, I live with my cousin," Alandra said, her voice suddenly sounding empty and hollow.

"I wanted to thank you for all that you have done tonight Alandra," Giles said, quickly changing the subject, for which she was thankful.

"It was no problem Giles. If you ever need some extra help don't hesitate to ask," Alandra said, giving the older man a small smile.

"I really do appreciate it Alandra," Giles told her, his voice filled with emotion, "Even if the others don't see what you do for us, I do." Alandra couldn't think of what to say and was surprised by his words.

"Thank you," was all she said before turning and heading to the doors.

"Alandra," Angel called, running to her side, "Let me walk you home." She didn't want him to. She wanted to have her thoughts to herself for a while, but she knew she was in no condition to defend herself, and Spike's boys might still be on the prowl.

She sighed deeply before nodding and saying, "Sure."

~0~0~

It was finally Halloween, a couple of weeks after the attack at the school. Alandra had barely had enough time to put together a costume for that night, excited to go trick or treating with the group of children Snyder had put her in charge of. She was lucky the new local costume store had what she needed to put everything together. She had decided to be Hawk Girl, one of her favorite super heroes from DC Comics. She had bought the wings and a fake mace, but the rest of the costume was made by her self. It was going to be nice to have some company other than the TV and her own brain, even if it was just a bunch of kids.

"Hey Alandra," Willow said, walking beside her as she headed towards her home.

"Hey Willow, excited for tonight," Alandra asked.

"Excited wouldn't be the word I would use," Willow said, making both girls laugh lightly.

"Then I'll be excited for the both of us," Alandra replied, making the red-head smile brightly at her.

"Xander and I are going to combine our groups together, do you want to join us," Willow asked, her face expectant. Alandra was still a little sore over what Xander had said to her, but decided she would try to put it in the past.

"Sure, I think that would be fun," Alandra said, her voice cheerful and happy. She had missed interacting with people. She knew that it wasn't good for her to stay so closeted in to herself, letting her thoughts and feelings fester and decided that being with Xander and Willow would be the best thing for her lonely heart at the moment.

"Great, I'll see you tonight then," Willow said before breaking off down a side street. So far it had been one of her brightest days since she had left Angel.

~0~0~

She had been wrong. Halloween was now her least favorite holiday. She would never dress up for Halloween again. She couldn't help but want to cry as she gently touched the wings that were now permanently attached to her back. Willow had turned into a ghost, Xander was a Military man, and Buffy had become an 18th century woman and was unconscious at their feet. Leaving them defenseless against any demonic fights that might come upon them.

"What are we going to do," Willow asked Alandra, fear shining in her eyes, "With Buffy the way she is we don't have anyone to help if Spike or his minions come and attack us."

"We have to find Angel," Alandra said as she watched the chaos that had lit up the usually quiet neighborhood. Screams and growls and groans filled the air. Car alarms began to go off, lights blinking from with in houses. Glass was breaking as little demons broke into homes. What used to be children were now a various assortment of short demons, vampires, princesses and other creatures. They had become the costumes they wore, and Alandra began to wonder who could perform such a powerful spell.

"I'll get Xander and have him take Buffy back to her house," Willow told her, also watching the chaos around them, "You find Angel and bring him there."

"No need," Angel's deep voice said from behind them, making both young women jump.

"I told you not to do that," Alandra said, whirling around to face him and promptly punched him hard in the chest. Willow seemed surprised by the action, but remained silent as she watched the two interact.

"It seems that everyone has become what they chose for Halloween," Angel said, his face completely blank. Alandra rolled her eyes at him before turning her back to show him her wings. Angel's eyes widened slightly as he watched the wings unfurl slightly before closing again. When Alandra turned back around she could see an amused yet worried glint in his eyes.

"Gee, you think," Alandra said, sighing before continuing on, "Xander has become a soldier and Buffy is an 18th century woman, which means that—"

"Which means that we don't have a Slayer," Angel said, finishing the sentence for her. He looked down at the unconscious slayer, her usually short blonde hair long and brunette, her small body encased in a pink gown.

"Exactly. Which also means she's completely defenseless. Anyone could come after her, anyone like Spike. We need to find out who ever did this and get them to reverse it before something really bad happens," Alandra said, taking a deep breath. She could see the worry begin to settle in on Angel's face at the thought of Buffy being hurt or worse. She was just thankful that they had the girl with them to protect her before anything could really happen.

"I'll find out who did this," Angel said, starting to turn away but Alandra stopped him.

"No, you need to stay with Buffy," Alandra said. When he opened his mouth to argue, she cut him off, "You're the only one strong enough to fight off Spike and his goons if it came to it. Willow will go get Giles and try to find out who did this."

"Where will you go," Angel asked. Usually Alandra would be the one to set out and take charge to find out the solution to the problem. The fact that she decided to take a more backseat role surprised him.

"With you of course," Alandra said, smiling brightly, "You're going to need some help protecting your lady love." Angel simply nodded before lifting the unconscious Buffy into his arms. Alandra turned to Willow, suddenly feeling bad for just volunteering the girl to get Giles. Willow smiled at Alandra's sheepish look.

"It's fine Alandra," Willow said cheerfully, "I'm the safest bet of finding Giles right now. Hopefully the two of us can get this reversed, and soon. Take care of Xander for me."

"Of course," Alandra said, smiling then turned to the waiting teenager-turned-soldier, "Harris, follow behind us and cover our 6. Do not deviate from your position."

"Sir, yes, sir," Xander shouted, saluting to Alandra before lifting his gun to the ready. Alandra wrinkled her nose at being called sir, but had let slide and followed behind Angel. She really hoped they would be able to reverse the spell. Her shoulders were beginning to hurt.

~0~0~

Buffy had ran away. The moment she had woken up at the Summers' home they were attacked. She had initially hid behind Angel, some how instinctively knowing that he was there to protect her, but then she saw his vamp face which sent her screaming out if the house.

"We need to find her Alandra," Angel said, desperation clear in his voice.

"We'll find her Angel. I promise," Alandra replied. She knew she shouldn't make promises she couldn't keep, but her words seemed to have eased Angel a little bit and she was thankful for that. She sometimes wondered what it would feel like to love someone that strongly. To know that they would do anything to keep you safe. Alandra wanted that type of love, but doubted it would happen. People didn't last very long on the Hell Mouth.

They had made it to the Warehouse district, surrounded by alleys and darkness. Angel seemed to know where to go, leaving Alandra to simply follow behind him. She was sure they had been going around in circle, and was about to say so, when they heard a high pitch scream come from their right. Angel ran towards the sound, leaving Alandra behind.

When she finally reached where Angel had ran, a fight had broken out. Buffy was once again knocked out and on the ground, Angel in front of her, protecting her body, trying to take out as many minions as he could without moving from his spot. Alandra immediately joined in the fray, able to stake two of them using the element of surprise before being grabbed from around her throat and thrown to the side. She hit the brick wall hard, crying out in pain as she landed on her wings.

"Well, hello Peaches," Spike drawled as he sauntered forward towards them. He immediately vamped out and attacked Angel, drawing him away from Buffy. Alandra slowly stood up, making her way over to the unconscious slayer. Her heart was racing, and thumped even harder as she saw Spike hit Angel with a large wooden plank; hard. Angel crashed through one of the walls, dust and brick flying every where.

"It's you with the interesting eyes," Spike said, a cruel smile on his face, his yellow eyes gleaming in the moon light, "What was your name again?"

"I never told you it the first time," Alandra said, making herself stand up straighter despite the pain and looking Spike directly in the eye.

"I can understand Peaches's need to keep you around. Although you will always play second fiddle to the slayer won't you," Spike said as he stepped closer towards her. Alandra was now shielding Buffy with her own body, "Why are you protecting her? Why not just let her die, and then you can have him all to yourself?"

"Sometimes you've gotta do what you gotta do," Alandra replied, her tone relaxed even though her body was tense, "Why do you even care anyway? Why aren't you just tossing me aside and draining me? We both know you can."

"I like you, you're fun," Spike told her, "I think I'll keep you around to entertain me. But first, the slayer." Alandra raised her fists, but she was too sluggish to block the back handed slap Spike gave her across her face. Her neck snapped to the side, making her fall and leaving Buffy open. Spike grinned in triumph before lifting the girl up by the neck.

"Finally, I can cross another slayer off my list," Spike said, bringing Buffy closer to him, his mouth wide open to drink.

"I don't think so," Buffy's voice said before lifting her head up, a smile on her face. Spike seemed shocked, allowing for Buffy to punch him in the face. Spike was shoved back by the force of her punch, a grin once again lighting up his vampire features, but his eyes were full of anger.

"You're no fun Slayer," Spike said before turning to Alandra, "I'll see you around luv." Just as Spike had disappeared, Angel finally emerged from where had crashed through the building, covered in dust.

"Are you ok Buffy," Angel asked, making his way over to her. Buffy nodded, a smile on her face as Angel wrapped his arms around her. He smiled softly back before leaning down and giving Buffy a passionate kiss. Alandra felt the urge to cry as she watched the couple. He hadn't even looked at her and asked her if she was ok. He only had eyes for Buffy. Alandra slowly got up, taking deep breaths to try to fight through the pain coursing inside her. She noticed that the wings were once again fake and forcefully ripped them off, her shoulders sore from having carried so much weight the entire night. She dusted herself off, watching the couple for another moment before beginning to turn around and walk out the alley.

"Wait, Alandra," Angel said, stopping her in her tracks. He jogged to her side, his cool hand on her arm to keep her from moving, "Let me take you home and look over your injuries."

"No, you should be with Buffy," Alandra said, closing her eyes tightly at how weak she sounded. Her eyes sprung open when she felt Angel's cool hand cupping her cheek.

"Buffy's fine, you're injured," Angel told her. He sounded so worried that tears truly began to well in Alandra's eyes. He sounded like he cared so much about her, she could see it in his eyes. But she didn't want to be thought of at the last moment just because she was there rather than because he cared about her. She felt like second fiddle, and the whole reason why she stopped being with Angel so much was so that she wouldn't be.

"I'll be fine Angel. Just a couple of scrapes and bruises, nothing some Neosporin and a hot bath can't fix," Alandra said, smiling up at him, but she could feel her sadness seep into it, "Go be with Buffy." She pulled away from him before slowly making her way out of the alley, a small limp in her gait.

"What is the deal with you two," Buffy asked from his left, having made her way over to him as he watched Alandra walk away.

"What do you mean," Angel asked, still concerned for his friend. He waited till Alandra was out of eye sight before looking towards Buffy, seeing the irritated look on her face.

"Why are you always touching her," Buffy began, "And it's not like hands on the shoulder or something like that. You touch her in a way you should be touching me." Angel turned to Buffy, an angry and tired look entering his eyes.

"Alandra is my friend Buffy," Angel began, "I would think after you injured her you would be a little bit more courteous. I can have friends too. Friends that aren't yours."

"I see the way she looks at you Angel," Buffy said, her entire aura full of haughtiness and jealousy, "I want you to stay away from her." Angel became angry enough at her words to vamp out. His eyes which were usually brown and held full of love, were yellow and full of anger, the ridges on his brow making his fury more pronounced than before.

"You do not give me ultimatums Buffy," Angel said, his voice practically a roar. Buffy took a step back, but still held her ground.

"She's trying to steal you from me," Buffy told him. After a few moments of glaring down at Buffy and feeling the heat of anger at her jealousy, Angel changed back into his human mask, suddenly feeling tired from the night.

"It's been a long night," Angel said, his voice sounding tired, "I'll see you when I see you." Buffy was too shocked to say anything, watching as Angel followed in the same direction as Alandra and leaving her alone in the alley.

Angel simply walked, allowing his mind and feet to wonder. When he finally stopped he realized where he was; at Alandra's house. He was looking through her window, watching as she brushed her short curls and braided them for the next day. He told himself that he simply came to make sure she was ok, but deep down he knew it wasn't true. He loved Buffy with all of his undead heart, but Alandra knew aspects of his life that Buffy had no clue about, and she still accepted him, all of him. That was a gift that he knew he didn't deserve and cherished with all of his being.

_Do you trust me?_

_Always._


	6. Chapter 6

It had been a month since Alandra had last seen Angel, and it was now nearly Buffy's birthday. None of the Scoobies kept her in the loop of what was happening in the supernatural world, leaving her clueless to what was happening with Spike and his maker Drusilla and making her live her days alone. So it's needless to say that Alandra was genuinely surprised when Willow handed her a small hand made invitation to the surprise birthday bash for Buffy, making her unable to move long after Willow had left her in the school hallway. She didn't know what to do. She knew that Willow and Giles would be happy to see her, but Buffy and Xander would not. They had treated her coldly after Halloween and knew she wouldn't be welcome. But on the other hand, it would be her chance to see Angel.

She knew if she really wanted to see him or talk to him she could call or visit him, but she couldn't bring herself do it. She couldn't look at him and not feel sadness. She had come to terms with the fact that she cared about Angel deeply, beyond that of a friend. And knowing that she had feelings for him and that he didn't feel the same hurt her heart. He looked at Buffy like she was the sole light of his life. She wanted him to look at her that way. To know that she was loved despite everything she was, or rather because of everything she was.

These thoughts ran around her mind for hours, making Alandra just roam around the school and enjoying the calm silence that came along with it's emptiness. The school after hours seemed to now be the only place where she could focus her mind, despite the dangers of being out at night.

She was just passing the computer lab when she heard two voices from within. One she recognized as Ms. Calendar's and the other a man she didn't know. When Alandra heard Angel's name she placed her body along the wall next to the door, listening to the conversation that was happening from within the classroom.

"You must keep Angel and Buffy away from each other. It is our only hope," the man's voice said. Alandra's eyes widened as she listened. She didn't know what they were talking about other than that Angel and Buffy were the main topics of conversation. She saw a shadow cross over the door making Alandra scoot into the dark shadows of the hall. She waited until both the man and Ms. Calendar left the room before running into the night and heading to Angel's.

~0~0~

"Angel, I need to talk to-Oh," Alandra said, crashing into his apartment before halting in her tracks to see Angel and Buffy together. Buffy looked at her with hate and anger, while Angel looked at her with relief and happiness.

"Alandra," Angel said, his voice almost a sigh before stepping away from Buffy and walking over to her.

"I need to talk to you. It's important," Alandra told him, glancing between him and Buffy before settling on Angel's brown eyes.

"Anything you need to say to him you can say to me as well," Buffy said, her arms crossing in front of her chest. Angel glared back at her, but didn't comment at her rudeness towards his best friend.

"This is just for Angel's ears. If he decides to tell you then that's his own choice," Alandra said. The girls just watched each other, a silent stand off as they waited for the other to break down and back off.

"Buffy," Angel began, drawing their attention to him, "Can you give us a moment please?" Alandra stood and watched as they waited for Buffy's response. The silence was tense as Buffy moved her glare from Angel to Alandra, fire and anger deep in her eyes.

"Fine," Buffy finally said before walking out of the apartment to the cool night air. Angel turned to Alandra, his body so close that his chest was nearly touching hers. She couldn't help but begin to flush at their closeness.

"What was it you wanted to tell me," he asked, his voice soft. It sent tingles down her spine.

"It's Ms. Calendar. I was walking around the school's halls, just thinking about stuff and I heard her talking to a man. He ordered her to try to keep you away from Buffy," Alandra explained, her voice raising pitch with each word from fear and nervousness. She kept her gaze on Angel's face, waiting for his reaction, but his face remained expressionless as usual.

"Did you hear anything else," Angel asked her.

"No, they stepped out of the room and then I came straight here," she said.

"Ok, thanks for letting me know," he replied nodding in understanding, but he didn't seem alarmed or worried. His lack of response shocked Alandra greatly.

"That's it? 'Thanks for letting me know'? Ms. Calendar is a part of something that might break you and Buffy up and that's all you have to say," Alandra asked, her tone incredulous. She took a step back, her hands on the sides of her head as if that would allow her to understand what had just happened. She couldn't understand why he didn't seem more upset about everything. She couldn't fathom it.

"Don't worry about me and Buffy. I'll deal with it," Angel simply said. Alandra screeched in frustration, making Angel wince in pain.

"That's not good enough Angel," she said. Her glare was fierce as she stepped back up to him, poking him in his chest, "I have been left out of the lop of what's been going on in this town and I deserve to know what's going on. Which also means being able to help you, because you know that you're going to need it."

"I really do appreciate you telling me Alandra," he replied, grabbing her hand to stop her incessant poking, "But let me handle this. Go home and get some rest." His words broke her heart. He was pushing her away where once he would have confided in her and allowed her to help. They would have created a plan and helped the Scoobies, together. It felt as if she were a child being sent to her room by her parent, rather than being equal partners. She wondered if this was all because of her. If he treated her this way because she left. Some how she felt more alone with him than she had in months being by herself.

Angel was shocked when he smelt tears come from Alandra and didn't understand where they had come from. He could see the sadness and hurt in her eyes, and as she tied to pull her hand away he clutched onto it tighter.

"What's wrong Alandra," he asked, his voice gentle this time. He lifted a hand to her cheek, a thumb wiping away a falling tear.

"Nothing. I'm fine," Alandra said. Her voice was thick with emotion as she broke away from him, using the heels of her hands to wipe away her tears.

"It's obviously nothing if you're crying," he replied.

"Are you still my friend? Are you pushing me away because I stopped training with you," she asked. It was so sudden that Angel reeled back. He was silent for a moment, wondering if she was serious, but the look in her eyes told him she was. He wrapped her in his arms, his chin on top of her head.

"I've been pushing you away from everything because I want to protect you," he whispered, "You somehow wiggled into my undead heart and became my first friend. I have no clue what I would do if I lost you because I couldn't protect you."

Alandra took comfort in his arms and his words, releasing a sigh of relief. She took a moment to bask in the thought that Angel needed her just as much as she needed him before pulling back slightly to look up at his face. Angel looked down at her, wondering how her eyes could be so expressive. Whenever he looked deep into her eyes he felt like he was caught in a storm, but this was the first time he really looked at her, beyond her eyes. Her curly hair just barely fell past her chin, accentuating her almond shaped eyes and oval face. Both still silent, Angel grabbed her hand and brought it up to their faces, looking at how her deep caramel colored skin contrasted so much with his own pale white. Alandra wondered what he was doing, but decided to remain quiet to see what else he would do.

"You're really beautiful," Angel said. Of all the things she was expecting him to say, it wasn't that, so she decided to change the subject back to the original topic of the conversation.

"I do what I do because I want to help people Angel," Alandra began, "You can't protect me from everything."

"I miss you," he said. Alandra smiled sadly before snuggling back into his arms for another hug. As she rested her cheek against his chest she was surprised that she wasn't more freaked out, even subconsciously, about not hearing a heart beat.

"I miss you too," she replied.

"Some very big, very bad things are going to happen soon Alandra," he said, pulling away to look down at her again, "I need you to stay in at night and be watchful during the day."

"What's going on Angel," she asked, but all she got in reply was a head shake.

"I can't do what I need to do if I'm worried about you. Promise me."

"I promise," she sighed out before finally pulling away completely from his arms. The loneliness she had felt earlier had begun to set in again the further she stepped away from him, but she was glad she was able to spend the time she had with him. She began to walk towards the door, reluctant to leave but knew it was best.

"Hey Angel," she called from the door way. She waited till Angel's eyes were on hers before speaking again, "Try not to get yourself dusted. I kind of need you in my life." Angel simply smiled, making Alandra smirk back before stepping out of the door and into the night, moving as quickly as she could to make it home safely.

When Buffy stepped back into the room, having heard their entire conversation, the tension was thick between them. She stepped up to Angel, touching Angel lightly on the arm, drawing his attention to her.

"What was it that she had to say," Buffy asked. She looked him eye, waiting for him to tell her the truth. Angel was quiet as he looked down at her, his face blank as his internal debate on what to tell her raged.

"It was nothing. She thought she had read something about a vampire that I needed to know about, but turns out it was just a story this time," Angel said, his lie easily falling from his lips. That's when he began to wonder why he didn't just tell Buffy about an attempt to pull them apart. Why wasn't he more upset about potentially being separated from the woman he was supposed to love for maybe forever. He didn't understand what was going on with his own feelings. All he knew was that he needed to protect Alandra at all costs.

~0~0~

"I'm leaving," Angel said to Alandra later that night. She had been too upset to go to the party and had decided to stay in. She was surprised to see Angel standing in her door way about an hour later. She was surprised by his presence and his words that they didn't initially register in her mind.

"Wait, what," she asked. She wanted to invite him, but something in her gut told her not to. Something big was going to happen, and it all had to do with Angel, she could feel it.

"I have to leave. Spike and Drusilla are trying to create The Judge to wipe out everything that holds humanity. We have the hand, so I need to take it far away from here so they can't get to it," he explained to her.

"Where are you going? Are you leaving now? This is all super sudden Angel," Alandra said, her heart beginning to race and the thought of not seeing him, even for a small while.

"I'm leaving soon . I don't know where I'm going exactly yet, but it's going to be some where very remote. So I won't be able to contact you for a while," Angel told her. Tears began to prickle her eyes as she stepped out of the door way and right into his arms. Angel took a moment, but he slowly wrapped his arms around her as she held him to her tightly.

"Where ever you're going, I need you to be safe," Alandra whispered into his shirt, knowing he could hear her, "Don't do anything stupid."

"When have I ever done anything stupid," Angel asked, making Alandra snort.

"You don't want me to actually answer that do you," she asked sarcastically before pulling back and looking up into his eyes, "But I mean it Angel. Or I'll find a way to un-dust you and then dust you again myself."

"You're the only person I believe when they say that," Angel said, smiling softly down at her, "If something happens to me-"

"Nothing's going to happen to you," Alandra said, cutting him off.

"_If _something happens to me," Angel continued, "I want you to promise me that the first chance you get, you're out of this town. You have too long of a life to have it wasted here in this darkness, this hell. Promise me Alandra."

"I promise," she whispered. Angel nodded before kissing her softly on her forehead before stepping away from her. Alandra stepped back into the safety of her home, streaming down her face. She watched as Angel turned around, his leather duster blowing in the small breeze as he walked away.

Alandra moved slowly as she closed the front door before the sobs truly began to rack her body. She rested her back against the door before sliding down the floor, her tears wetting her cheeks and chin, sniffling hard to keep her nose from running. She looked up as her cousin came out to the front room where the door was, a worried look on her face.

"What's wrong Alandra? What happened? Are you hurt," her cousin asked, kneeling down in front of her and placing a healing hand on her Alandra's knee. Alandra looked at her cousin before banging her head against the door, taking a few deep breaths to calm herself down.

"I'm fine," Alandra began, her voice soft and full of sadness, "I just had to say goodbye to someone." Her cousin not knowing what else to do simply sat there with her on the floor next to the front door, allowing Alandra to cry out all of her pain and sadness.

~0~0~

It was the next night and Alandra felt empty. It was one thing not being around Angel in town, but knowing that he was some where half way around the world in danger. It felt like her other half was gone and that thought put her in even more despair. Angel shouldn't be her other half. He was Buffy's other half. Buffy was the love of his un-life, and Alandra had no right to be feeling that way about him. That's what she kept telling herself. Angel wasn't hers, never was and never would be. And yet she couldn't help but seem to not think about him as if he was hers. That he was a part of her in a way no one else was. And those thoughts scared her more.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by a small knock on her window. She immediately grabbed her stake and holy water and slowly walked over to the window. Through the sheer curtains and the moon light streaming in she could see Angel, a bright smile on his face, standing on the small balcony she had. She quickly opened her the window, a shocked look on her own features.

"Angel! What are you doing here? I thought you would be gone by now," Alandra said before dropping her stake and water and reaching out the window to give him a hug.

"Change of plans. The moment I could I came to see my favorite girl," Angel said, but his words felt off. Alandra immediately knew something was different, and began to panic when she tried to pull away and he wouldn't let her go.

"Angel, what are you doing? Let me go," she said. She tried to keep her voice strong, but the waver at the end told her she failed. Angel chuckled in her ear, sending shivers of fear down her spine.

"Didn't I teach you better than to drop your stake and water Alandra," he whispered huskily into her ear. She tried to pull away even harder, but his strength was too much for her.

"Who are you? You're not Angel," she said, her heart thumping heart thumping hard against her chest. Angel took a breath in, smelling her panic and fear that was beginning to roll off of her in waves.

"My name is Angelus," he said, placing his lips against her jugular. Alandra tried to wriggle free from his grasp, but his arms were like iron straps, holding her in place.

"What are you going to do with me," she asked, tears now streaming down her face.

"We're just going to have some fun," Angel replied against her neck. Alandra closed her eyes in defeat as she felt his teeth sink into her skin. She cried out softly as she felt the push and pull of him sucking her blood before passing out in his arms. Angelus smiled down evilly at her before brushing a curly strand of hair away from her face and pulling her the rest of the way out of the window. He lifted her up completely into his arms, making sure her head rested completely against his chest, holding onto tightly before jumping down from the balcony onto the hard ground and walking away into the night.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N: The next few chapters are very violent and may be triggering. If you find that this will affect you in any sort of negative way, message me and I will explain to you what occurred in the story and tell you which chapter is safe for you to return to. I apologize for the inconvience this may have caused any one, but I would much rather message you separately than you guys be emotionally and mentally unsafe. Thank you for your patience. LOVE YOU!

Alandra felt warm as she came to, her mind woozy as she tried to process everything that had happened. As she opened her eyes she saw that she was in a bedroom, her arms raised high above her head by chains as she laid sprawled out on the ground, the rough stone cooling her back. She looked around, seeing the fire in the corner of the room, a bed covered in black and red satin and velvet. Candles were lit all along the room, giving everything a soft glow. She finally looked down at herself and realized she had been stripped down to her underwear, making her panic really begin to set in. She was trapped. She didn't know where she was and had no idea of how to get out.

"Look who's finally awake," Angel's chipper voice said from the shadows. Alandra looked up to see him sitting in a high winged back chair, a book resting face down in his lap as he looked at her. His dark brown eyes glowed brightly in the darkness, everything else encased in shadow. She could feel the evil roll off of him in waves, the atmosphere and heat nearly suffocating her. She remained silent and he stood up and walked over to her, kneeling down in front of her. He grabbed her by the chin and forced her to look up at him. She turned her eyes away from him, not wanting to see the darkness in his eyes.

"Look at me," he said, his tone gentle, but she refused, making him shake her head in anger, "I said look at me!" She did as was told for fear of him accidentally snapping her neck.

"There they are," he said in awe, "Those beautiful storm grey eyes. Soul boy was obsessed with them you know. Couldn't go a day or night without them popping into his mind."

"What happened to Angel," Alandra asked, "Who are you?" He wore Angel's face, but he was not Angel. He was something black and destructive and hateful. She felt her skin crawl whenever she looked at him.

"Let me tell you a story," the man that wore Angel's face said. He stood up and began to pace around the room, grabbing various knick knacks and observing them in his hands. He would occasionally glance at her to see if she was listening to him, a smirk on his face.

"A long time ago, a drunkard named Liam was out at the pub. As he comes out drunk out of his mind he see this beautiful blonde woman, he goes up to her and talks to her and her face changes before his eyes. It was grotesque as the ridges formed along her brow, her eyes became yellow, and her teeth became fangs. She bites into his neck and drains him nearly to death before giving him her own blood, making him into me: Angelus," he said. Alandra was silent as she watched him tell his story. He was so different from Angel, and yet so similar in certain ways. The power they carried within themselves was full of confidence. She watched his hands and the way his fingers curled around whatever he held and it reminded her of her Angel. She didn't want to see that Angel came from him, but she couldn't deny it.

"So how did you become Angel and how are you here now," Alandra asked, curiosity getting the better of her as her thoughts swirled around in her mind.

"We were in Romania and Darla, my sire, ordered me to drink a gypsy girl. A gift from her for our anniversary. Turns out she was the favored daughter of that gypsy clan and cursed me with that pathetic human soul. Did you know that he used to only eat rats and mice? Lived on the street he was so overcome with guilt with everything we had done. It's disgusting really," Angelus explained.

"This is what Ms. Calendar and that man were talking about weren't they? That's why they wanted you stay away from Buffy," Alandra said, finally able to figure out what the conversation she overheard meant before confusion overcame her again, "But why?"

"You're certainly a curious little creature," Angelus said, a smirk on his face, "The curse was that the moment Soul boy achieved perfect happiness he would lose it, allowing me to come back and have all the fun I want. So he banged the fucking slayer, achieved that 'perfect happiness' and now here I am! And I have a lot of time to make up for."

Alandra felt her heart crack at hearing that Angel and Buffy had, had sex. She tried to keep her face as emotionless as possible, but the glee on Angelus's face told her that he knew exactly what she was thinking.

"You wanted it to be you, didn't you," he asked, kneeling down in front of her again. Alandra looked deep into his eyes to see if any of the Angel she cared for was still there, all she was met with was wickedness.

"What do you want from me," Alandra asked, her voice low.

"I told you earlier pet, we're going to have some fun," he replied, kissing her on the forehead before standing up and walking towards the door, "I have some business to take care. Don't wait up for me."

She watched his back as he walked out of the room, locking the door behind him. She looked up at her hands that were being strapped up by heavy metal chains, the cuffs cutting into the gentle skin of her wrists. She gripped onto the chains, using all of her strength to try to loosen anything, but knew that it was hopeless. When she felt her stomach begin to growl the despair and sadness began to settle in. She was going to die there, locked in chains in her underwear, and there was nothing she could do about it. Now it was just a matter of when.

~0~0~

"Wakey, wakey, it's time for eggs and bakey," Angelus's cheerful voice sang from in front her, slowly waking her up. Her stomach growled loudly at the smell of eggs and bacon, her eyes slowly drawing open. She looked up to blearily see Angelus sitting on the ground in front of her, a large plate of food on his lap.

"Open your mouth wide," he ordered, lifting up a fork full of food to her mouth. Alandra complied, closing her eyes in delight at the sweet taste of food. She chewed slowly before swallowing, feeling uncomfortable at the intense way Angelus was watching her eat each bite he gave her.. For twenty minutes they sat in silence, Angelus feeding her food and giving her water. She couldn't understand why at all.

"Do you feel better now," he asked her. Alandra reluctantly nodded. Angelus smiled before standing up and placing the empty plate on the table.

"I'm going to tell you a little secret," Angelus began, his tone full of mischievousness and glee as he looked down at her, "He's always wanted you. Did you know that?" Alandra was shocked by the quickness and bluntness of his words. She shook her head, lowering her gaze to look at her thighs. She didn't know how to process his words. She didn't want to believe him, she knew she shouldn't believe him.

"No, he wants Buffy. He's loves Buffy," Alandra said softly, more to herself than to him, making Angelus guffaw loudly.

"Didn't you ever wonder why he always was touching you? The little pecks on the cheek and head, the way he would hold you when you hugged. He would get so hard at the thought of fucking that tight body of yours, and then he would pathetically feel guilty about it after he jacked off to the sight of your face in his mind. The thought of you beneath him. That seems to be the only thing we can agree on; you," Angelus told her. Alandra shook her head even harder, her eyes squeezed shut tightly. She didn't want to hear any of it. She didn't want to hear how maybe the only thing Angel might have valued was her body. That thought hurt worse than anything else. That their friendship wasn't real.

"Stop it," she whispered, tears welling in her eyes.

"Don't you want to hear the things he thought about doing to you? Don't you want to hear how he wanted to cuff you to his bed and do delicious things to your body till you were screaming his name," Angelus pushed. Alandra looked up at him, sadness on her features.

"But Buffy," she began.

"He used that bitch occupy himself," Angelus spat in anger, "He only pretended to want her, to love her because he couldn't handle that he wanted you. I kept telling him to just fuck you and get it over with. He was only able to cum with the slayer because he was thinking of you."

"Why are you telling me this," Alandra asked, pain wrenching her heart. She felt dirty and used. She felt disgusted with herself.

"What, you aren't happy to hear that he wanted you? He knew you wanted him, could smell it every time you two touched," Angelus told her gleefully. Alandra shut her eyes again, sobs wanting to wrack her body, but she worked her hardest to keep the sobs in.

"Look at me Alandra," Angelus said, his tone switching from gleeful to dark in a millisecond. Alandra felt the spike of fear, and did as he said. Suddenly a hand came down and slapped her across the face. Alandra cried out in pain, tasting the blood that began to well in her mouth. Then she felt a cool hand grab her chin, and cool lips on hers, a tongue invading her mouth and tasting her blood. Her entire body was shaking, her heart racing, waiting for him to pull away.

"Every thing I hoped you imagined it would be," Angelus said, a smug look on his face as if he had given her a great gift. Fury swamped Alandra's body as she looked into his eyes. She gathered all of the blood and saliva in her mouth before spitting it out onto his face. Angelus reared back, quickly wiping the spittle away, an evil and angry gleam in his eyes.

"You're going to pay for that," he told her darkly before leaving Alandra alone in the room once again.

~0~0~

Two nights later Alandra woke up from a slap across her face. She looked up to see Angelus, an wicked smile on his face and a dark gleam in his eyes. He hadn't fed her since that night with the kiss, and her body was beginning to feel weak. Her stomach growled, and her throat felt dry, saliva only doing so much to relieve the pain.

"I'm going to teach you some manners young lady," Angelus said before slapping her across the other side of her face. Her face was throbbing with pain, but Alandra made no noise this time. She simply glared up at him, a fierce look in her eyes.

"You wish soul boy was here, don't you," Angelus asked, waiting for her to answer and slapping her again when she remained silent. Her breathing was deep as she tried to fight through some of the pain she was feeling, watching Angelus as he grabbed a small horse crop from the table near by.

"What's my name," he asked. She said nothing, a small cry escaping her lips as he wacked her hard against one of her thighs. She looked down to see a large red welt begin to form.

"What _is my name_," he asked again, hitting the soft flesh of her the underside of her bicep. Alandra hissed in pain, but still said nothing.

"Fine, you want to play it that way? We'll play it that way," Angelus said before turning to the table and picking up a small knife. Fear spiked in Alandra's heart, watching him with wide eyes as he kneeled down in front of her. He dragged the cool blade down the center of her chest before dragging it across her throat and resting it against her collar bone.

"Say my name Alandra," he ordered, but she still remained silent. He smirked before drawing a large x underneath her collar bone slowly, making Alandra scream in pain. He repeated his words, but Alandra still refused to say anything, the salt of her tears making the bloody wound sting. He slowly dragged the knife down to her stomach, looking into her eyes. He never tore his eyes away as he slowly made the cut into her skin. She screamed again as the burning sensation entered her. She could feel her skin separating, the hot blood seeping out of her body slowly, drip by drip. He chuckled at her screams before making another long and deep cut, making her bleed more deeply than before.

"Please, please. No more," Alandra cried out through sobs, "No more. I'll say it."

"What's my name," he asked again, waiting expectantly for her answer. She looked into his eyes again, wishing Angel or her father were there to comfort her and tell her everything was going to be alright. She even allowed herself to imagine it for a moment; Angel comforting her telling her that it was all a dream. But another slice made into her thigh brought her back to her painful reality.

"A," she began, her voice weak from the screaming, "A-asshole." Angelus snarled before burying the knife deep into her other thigh. Alandra screamed again, her voice cracking from the force of it. She whimpered as he slowly pulled the knife out, and was surprised by his next actions.

Angelus sighed before dragging a cool tongue across the bloodied skin on her collarbone. The coolness soothing the pain. Alandra sucked in a breath as he wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her body closer to his mouth. Soon he kissed his way down her body and began to give the same treatment to the cuts along her stomach. She was frozen in place, too shocked to move by how gently he was suddenly treating her.

"Look at what you made me do," Angelus said, murmuring against her belly, blood on his lips. Soon the cuts stopped bleeding there and he made his way lower and kissed his way down to the cut along her thigh.

"You have a lot of fire Alandra," Angelus said before making a long drag of his tongue across the cut. Alandra simply watched him as he switched to the other leg where he stabbed her, sopping up the blood that was leaking out of the large wound.

"And I want to extinguish it," he finished telling her. He carried on like that. For how long she wasn't sure, but she took little peace in the small amount of pain relief his cool tongue provided her. She still shook from pain and fear and soon the sensations were to much for her and she passed out. Angelus looked at the girl that was now sprawled out on the floor beneath him. He gently brushed away a curl away from her face before standing up and walking over to the table that held all of his devices. He grabbed a curved needle and thick brown thread. He sat back down on the ground and began to make work on stitching the wound he had made in her thigh.

~0~0~

"Is a Mister Rupert Giles in here," a young woman called softly as she stepped into the school library. The students that were surrounding one of the tables, books splayed out every where, all nodded to an office door. Soon the British librarian stepped out of the hidden office, a curious expression on his face.

"I'm Rupert Giles, how may I help you," he asked, closing the book that was in his hand and setting it down on a book shelf. The woman was nervous and seemed frightened, making Giles wonder what she could possibly have to say.

"My cousin was taken three days ago," she began, taking a deep breath to calm down before continuing on, "I've told the police, but I know they won't do anything. She knows you, she always speaks highly of you, and my uncle said to come talk to you because you would know what to do."

"Your cousin's Alandra," Giles asked. She nodded her head, making Giles sigh sadly and remove his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"Her room wasn't messed up or anything. At first I thought she was just visiting with her friend, Angel. But when she didn't call or come home I knew something was wrong," she explained, her voice breaking towards the end as tears began to well in her eyes. Giles placed a comforting hand on her shoulder before leading her to an empty chair and sitting her down.

"What's you name young lady," Giles asked, his voice gentle.

"Lily," she told him, "I know there's some freaky stuff that goes on in this town. I know that Alandra got wrapped up in whatever goes on here, and now she's in danger because of it. You have to find her and bring her home safely. She's my responsibility, and I can't let her or my uncle down."

"We will find her," Giles told her, grabbing her hand and squeezing it in reassurance, "We'll make sure that she comes home safe and sound."

"How come she's living with you and not her father," Xander asked, receiving an elbow to the stomach from Willow. He shrugged, not understanding why it was wrong to ask that question. Lily seemed to take it in stride though.

"Some things happened between her parents," Lily said, "The courts got involved and asked what she wanted to do. She and her father decided a change of scenery and a break from each other would be the best. So she moved in with me about a year ago."

"She trusts you," Lily said to Giles as she turned back to him, "You've become the father figure in her life here in Sunnydale. Please, help her."

"We'll find her Lily," Willow said this time, stepping up to get a closer look at her, "We'll get her back." Lily nodded before standing up and heading back towards the swinging doors of the library.

She looked back at the group saying, "Thank you," before walking completely out and leaving the Scoobies alone once again.

"It seems that the situation has become even more dire," Giles said. He sighed and removed his glasses again to clean the lenses before replacing on them on his face.

"Angelus must have taken her the night he came back," Willow said, shocked by the scoff she heard come from Buffy.

"Nothing has changed," Buffy said, her voice dark, her words surprising everyone.

"Angelus kidnapped Alandra for who knows what reason, doing who knows what to her. I would say damn near everything has changed Buffy," Xander said.

"We can't worry about her. We just need to figure out a way to get Angel back," Buffy told them. Willow's face scrunched in anger as she took a step towards her best friend.

"Alandra is our friend. If it was anyone of us, even Cordelia, you would be working your hardest to get us back. Why are you acting this way," Willow asked. Buffy opened her mouth to reply, but Cordelia beat her to it.

"She's jealous at how close Alandra and Angel are," Cordelia said.

"That's not true, I just think we need to stay focused at the task at hand," Buffy replied. Her voice sounded false, telling them all the truth. Tears began to fill Willow's eyes.

"I will not have your jealousy _kill _my friend Buffy," Willow told her, her voice fierce, "All she has ever done has tried to help us. She even stopped training with Angel for you." Buffy felt her own anger fill her, making her lash out.

"You don't see what I see," Buffy spat, "The way he touches her. The way he looks at her. The way they look at each other! He's supposed to be mine, but it's always felt like he's belonged to her!"

"Angel isn't a thing that belongs to anyone Buffy," Cordelia said, stepping beside Willow. The tension was mounting in the room, and Giles knew that angered enough Buffy would get into a physical fight with Cordelia.

"Enough," Giles said, his voice loud and full of command. All of the teenagers turned their heads towards him, waiting for his next order, but he looked directly at Buffy.

"We _will _focus on trying to get Alandra out Buffy," Giles told her. She opened her mouth to argue but he cut her off with a glare.

"Even with the help Alandra has always tried to provide us, you can't let your anger get in the way of what is right. We don't know what Angelus is doing to her in there, and getting her out is of the upmost importance. We'll find a way to restore his soul later on. Do I make myself clear," Giles told her, waiting for her answer.

"Yes Giles," Buffy said, her voice almost petulant as she grabbed some weapons and stomped out of the library, leaving the others alone.

"Do you think he'll kill her Giles," Willow asked. She sounded so innocent that it made Giles want to cry. To know that Alandra was in Angelus's clutches was enough to make him weep in and of itself.

"No. She's important to Angel, so she'll be important to her. What that entails I'm not sure, but I know it's not good," Giles replied honestly. Willow nodded before sitting at the table and beginning researching again. They had to get Alandra out, no matter what.


	8. Chapter 8

Alandra no long knew how long she had been trapped. Her only source of company was Angelus and the darkness and the pain. He rarely fed her, only giving her small sips of water before he began his torture sessions. Then giving her more sips of water after words. She just wanted the floor to swallow her up whole and take her back to her own bed. Where she can be swallowed beneath the comfort of her covers and safe in her room. She used to think it was a dream, the pain, but now it is her closest friend.

"Well he's certainly fucked you up, asn't he pet," a strong accented voice said from the shadows. It took all of Alandra's strength to raise her head to see the new visitor. Pain flashed through her body as her muscles worked to lift her head, her eyes blurry as they tried to focus on who was their. The first thing she recognized was the shock of peroxide blonde hair. As the whole picture became clearer she realized it was Spike, and he was in a wheel chair.

"Spike," she said, her voice a hoarse whisper.

"Aye, it's me luv," he replied. He rolled up to her in his wheel chair, looking at her. It almost looked like pity.

"Come to laugh at me," she asked. She wanted to sound strong, but her voice broke from emotion and sadness. She wanted to be done with life, but she also didn't want to give up. Her heart and body was in shambles.

"No luv. I came to give you some water and soup," Spike told her. He rolled closer, lifting her chin up with a gentle hand before resting a cup against her lips and slowly tipping the cool water down her throat. She drunk it greedily, wishing he would go faster, but knew he was going slowly so that she wouldn't choke. Once the water was gone he pulled the cup back and placed it on the ground beside him. She sighed softly, closing her eyes, trying to stop the tears of happiness. It was a small cup of water, but it felt as if it had healed her from the inside out.

Spike saw her look of relief and actually truly felt pity for her. He heard the screams that came from the room nearly every night, and now he could actually see the cuts and bruises that riddled her body. He didn't know why Angelus ordered him to make sure she had and was fed, but Spike knew better than to defy him in the state he was in. He felt as pathetic as she looked.

"Open your mouth up luv so we can get some food in that belly," Spike ordered, and Alandra quickly complied. It was a simple soup with soft noodles and vegetables that would be easy for her stomach to digest. It took nearly an hour to complete the task, the spoon only able to get a small amount in her mouth with out spilling even though she just wanted to ravish the entire bowl, but Alandra's critical mind knew it was for the best.

"Why," she asked Spike after she finished the last sip of soup. Spike leaned back in his chair, his jaw clenching as he looked into her eyes. There wasn't as much fire there as the last time, but there was still determination to not let Angelus break her, and he had to admire that. Drusilla didn't last this long before she had broken, but she already had the visions to deal with before hand, and those hadn't helped at all.

"Angelus ordered me to make sure you had some water and food. And next up is a shower, because you smell of death in here," Spike said before rolling to one cuff holding a small hand and unlocking it. The arm fell limply, the muscles weak from having been held up for so long. When he unlocked the other cuff, her whole body slumped down, having been in the same position for who knows how long.

"I don't know if I can walk," Alandra admitted, her voice soft and sad. He could hear the hate she held for herself in that moment. The hate to having to admit that they needed help. He sympathized with those feelings completely.

"Good thing we have some ready made wheels then," Spike said before leaning down and lifting her easily up on to his lap in the chair. Alandra wrapped her arm around his neck, but she knew that her whole body was too weak to really do anything. Spike wheeled them into the large adjoining bath room, thanking the heavens that there was a claw foot tub with a shower head because he had no clue how he would have managed the shower while he couldn't walk or stand. When they finally got in there, Alandra was too out of it to notice the magnificence of the room, enjoying the feeling of being free.

He picked her up beneath her waist and legs and slowly placed her in the white claw foot tub. He ordered her to strip, which she did while he rolled around and grabbed the soap and shampoo she would need. She knew that Spike was about to see her naked but she couldn't care. Nothing like that seemed to matter anymore. She didn't trust him, but right now he was providing comforts she hadn't had in a while.

Spike turned on the water, making sure it was on the cooler side of warm so as to not make her faint from the heat before removing the shower head that was on the side and bringing it around to rinse her body. Alandra hissed from the water hitting some of the still fresh cuts, but soon the sting ebbed into a satisfying tingle.

"How long have I been here," Alandra asked him. Spike remained silent for a long time, making sure he rinsed her entire body before setting the nozzle down and beginning the washing process. He started with her back, to ease her into being touched. He was surprised at how readily she allowed him to touch her, but was thankful a fight wasn't happening to get her clean. He didn't know how long his patience would have handled against that.

"For about 3 weeks," he finally told her. Alandra's breath hitched, but she didn't say anything more after that. Spike gently ran the wash cloth covered in soap over her shoulders and down her chest before cleaning her arm pits. Alandra just sat and allowed him, her mind the clearest it's been since she had first gotten there.

"He keeps trying to make me say his name," Alandra told him as he started cleansing her legs. Spike looked at her, but said nothing and allowed her just talk.

"At one point I just kept calling him Angel, he got so made he gave me those," she nodded her head down to the long, deep gashes that ran the length of her leg, "Then he decided that carving the letter A into my bicep was another good punishment. I am surprised about one thing though."

"What's that pet," Spike asked, but he already knew the answer. He set work to the other leg, massaging the muscles underneath but trying to be gentle enough to not open up some of the fresh scabs. He saw that some of the deeper wounds were stitched up and had been kept clean and was amazed at Angelus's caution.

"He hasn't raped me or even tried to," she told him, her tone blunt, "I see the way he looks at me, I can see that he wants to at least do something, but he doesn't. Do you know why?" Spike debated on whether to tell her or not, to give her hope or not, that the only reason Angelus hasn't touched her is because he doesn't want to truly break her or her spirit, but decided against it.

"I'm not Angelus, I have no clue what goes on his bloody mind," Spike answered. He placed the wash cloth in her hand before pulling away from her.

"I'll let you finish cleaning up, let me know when you're ready for me to rinse the soap off," Spike told her. Alandra was shocked, not understanding at first what he meant, but then realized that he hadn't touched her inappropriately in her nether region, and was allowing her to do the job herself. She quickly washed her bottom area, her muscles training to lift her body up to clean herself. Her arms shook with the effort, nearly crying out with the effort it took. She looked up at him, giving him the ok to come back.

Spike rolled back, turning the water back on and rinsing her off of all the soap and dried and crusted blood and ooze layer that had formed on her body. When it was all rinsed off, Spike then told her to scoot forward so that he could begin to wash her hair. She followed his command, sighing as the cool water hit her scalp. Spike set the shower head nozzle head down again before grabbing the shampoo and conditioner and began the process of washing her curly tendrils. It was longer than the last time he saw her, the dark brown nearly black curls dull and limp. He used his fingers to gently comb through the knots that had formed, ignoring the small hisses he heard whenever he tugged a little too hard. Soon the shampooing was complete and he rinsed, leaving the conditioner the last thing to do. He made sure to massage her scalp as he ran his fingers through her now clean hair. As he rinsed the last dredges of gunk and dead hair off of her body, Alandra closed her eyes and allowed some tears to fall.

Spike watched her closely and wondered if she was going to have a full on sob fest, and was surprised that she hadn't yet. He watched as a few tears fell, but it wasn't enough to cleanse her soul, and that was what she really needed. He didn't know what Angelus's plan was, but it seemed almost as if he was punishing her. For what Spike didn't really know. Angelus was crazy now, being locked up in a cage by the soul, and Spike didn't know what is sire was thinking anymore. Spike rolled away to grab the towels and placed them in her lap. Alandra slowly wrapped herself in the towels, her muscles shaking with the effort it took to sit up and wrap the towel around her body. She then lifted her arms up slowly to wrap the other towel around her hair. Once she was done Spike leaned down and lifted her out of the tub and back into his lap.

He rolled them back into the bedroom to see Angelus sitting on the bed, a cruel smirk on his face. Alandra looked at him, her face expressionless but anger in her eyes. Angelus had wanted to extinguish her fire, but it seemed he had just stoked it further. There was another man covered in tattoos on the side, a long table in the center. It was covered in ink pots, gauze and a tattoo machine sitting on the side. Alandra felt her body tense at the sight and wondered what Angelus was planning.

"You told the soul that you've always wanted a tattoo, isn't that right Alandra," Angelus said. He stood up and lifted Alandra into his arms, walked over to the table and sat her down. Alandra looked at the man that had been standing on the side, watching as he plugged in his equipment and set out the ink next to him.

"Now you're finally going to have your dream come true," Angelus told her. Alandra remained silent and didn't fight, couldn't fight, as he made her lie down on her stomach, lowering the towel down till it was just covering her bottom. She felt cool paper touch her shoulders and down the spine of her back and wondered how large the tattoo was going to be.

"Just try to relax, we don't want you passing out in the middle," Angelus whispered in her ear. Alandra squeezed her eyes shut, amazed that she barely registered the needle as it pierced into her skin. When she opened her eyes again they were met with ice blue, and that was what she focused on the entire six hours she laid on her stomach, waiting for the tattoo artist to finish.

Angelus noticed the eye lock between his grandchilde and his Alandra and wondered if which one he should punish for it, but decided not to. He still had plans for Alandra, and Spike would help aid in easing her into the transition. Not that he could do much stuck to the wheel chair as he was. He wanted Alandra to be marked forever, beyond the scars she would carry. He wanted the whole world, both human and supernatural to know that she was his and always will be.

~0~0~

"There has to be a way to get into the bloody mansion," Giles said, his voice practically a yell in anger and frustration. He had been pouring over plans and ideas for weeks to try to get Alandra out and he felt like he had failed her. Three weeks she's been in there, going through who knows what kind of pain and torture.

"We'll find a way Giles," Willow said. Her voice was soothing, and she tried to sound hopeful but even she could tell that it wasn't working.

"We should try to find a way to restore Angel's soul," Buffy said, making everyone turn to glare at her, "Once we get Angel back, he'll be able to help get her out."

"That won't be necessary," Angelus's tainting voice said from the shadows. He smiled as he saw everyone tense and turn to where he was standing. He enjoyed taunting them so much.

"What do you want," Buffy asked, her voice dark, her hand already on a stake and ready to fight.

"I'm not here to fight you tonight," Angelus said, "I just wanted to give you a little update on our favorite girl."

"What have you done to her," Giles asked, standing up from the table. Angelus had never seen the man so angry, power radiating off of him. He always had assumed the Watcher was simply a meek older man, but Angelus could feel his darkness roll of off him and knew to not underestimate him.

"Oh you know, the usual. Some starvation, some dehydration, some cutting. Her body is riddled with scars now, I'm calling her my new masterpiece," Angelus said, smiling brightly, the taunt clear in his voice.

"You bastard," Giles spat, moving to fight him but was held back by Willow and Xander. Angelus released a chuckle, walking around the room, his body completely relaxed. They knew the nonchalance was an act, and it put them all on edge.

"I'll be sure to let her know that you don't care about her. I'm sure that'll break her finally, knowing that her supposed friends can't even bring themselves to care enough to rescue her," Angelus told them, picking up a small knick knack that had been resting on the table. He waited patiently for one of them to realize what he was going to do. He smirked at the wide eyes Giles gave him.

"You want to turn her," Giles said, realization finally hitting him. Angelus wanted to break her enough to be dependent on him.

"Why not? She would make a fantastic vampire. All fire and anger. And once she hears the news, the first ones she'll come after are you. The ones that abandoned her when she needed them most. It'll be such a glorious sight," Angelus said, licking his lips in anticipation as his mind thought about all of the possibilities of Alandra being a vampire..

"Don't you touch her," Giles roared, moving to try to fight him again, but Xander had a strong grip on the older man.

"Oh Rupert my friend," Angelus said, a smirk on his lips, "I already have." Everyone knew what his words meant, and Angelus quickly slipped out of the library before he got caught up in the fight he knew would happen if he didn't leave fast enough. It was a lie, Angelus hadn't laid a sexual finger on Alandra. He was saving that for her last night as a human, and that night was soon approaching.

"We have to dust him Buffy," Xander said, making Buffy fly into anger.

"We still have a chance at saving him," Buffy yelled.

"With Jenny gone we have no chance of returning his soul Buffy," Giles said, anger still pumping through his veins.

"How do we know he hasn't already turned her? What would be the point in dusting him then," Buffy asked her mentor.

"He hasn't," Willow cut in, "He wants to break her. You heard him. She hasn't broken yet, we still have a chance to save her, and the only way to do that is to kill him."

"What would Angel want Buffy," Willow asked. She looked into her best friend's eyes, hoping the words would get through to her, but she knew that they hadn't. All Buffy wanted was getting Angel back, damned anyone else.

"Fine," Buffy spat before turning around and stomping out of the library, "I'm going for a patrol." The rest of the Scoobies were silent as they watched her walk out, sad looks on all of their faces.

"She's not going to do it Giles," Willow said, "As long as there is a chance she might get Angel back, she won't kill him."

"I know Willow," Giles replied in a sigh, "I just hope we're not too late."


	9. Chapter 9

Alandra had been moved to the bed, cuffed by her ankle which allowed her more freedom to moved than before. Angelus had her dressed in a black chiffon dress, the material slightly irritating the healing tattoo. Alandra could see her bones through her skin and knew that she must look emaciated. Like a living corpse riddled with scars and bruises. She was just thankful she was finally off the hard cold floor and now on a comfortable bed.

"Is this my new dolly," a light, airy voice asked from the door way. Alandra looked up to see a pale woman with long black hair in red velvet standing before her between Angelus and Spike.

"She's going to be your new mommy Dru," Angelus said, his voice gentle. Alandra had yet to see a gentle side with anyone. It unnerved her to see him that way with Drusilla

"She's the storm," Drusilla said, stepping towards Alandra. Drusilla's eyes were wide as she looked at her, the blue clouded with craziness and visions.

"What was that Dru," Angelus asked, wondering what his childe was going on about. When Drusilla had a vision they came true, but deciphering whether what she was saying was her insanity or a vision was the hard part.

"She's the storm. She must not be turned Daddy. The stars tell me of plans and more plans. She must remain in the sun to walk along the night. Plans and plans, the storm will run and ravage. The storm is powerful," Drusilla said, gently laying a hand on Alandra's cheek. Alandra jumped slightly at the touch, the hand cooler than most. Drusilla just looked at her, a small smile on her pale face. It was almost as if Drusilla was trying to bury herself inside Alandra all through the eyes.

"She can never be one of us," Dru told them, but never tore her eyes away from Alandra's. She didn't know what Drusilla meant that she was the storm, but she was thankful that she told them not to turn her. She could tell that both Spike and Angelus had taken whatever she said very seriously, especially by the disappointed look on Angelus's face.

"Fine, I won't turn her," he said, his lips becoming a small pout. Alandra wanted to punch his face to wipe the pout right off of it.

"May I brush her hair Daddy," Drusilla asked reverently, finally looking away from Alandra to Angelus.

"Sure, just be gentle Dru, she'll break if you brush too hard," Angelus told her. Dru nodded before grabbing the brush and settling herself behind Alandra and running the brush down her hair. It had been so long since someone had brushed her hair that it had began to soothe Alandra. She could feel her body relaxing with every gentle stroke Drusilla made.

"How is your back feeling lover," Angelus asked, settling himself at the foot of the bed. Spike rolled to the other side of her, still remaining silent and watching.

"Fine," was all Alandra replied with. Dru began to hum softly behind her, soothing Alandra even more, but she knew to keep her guard up. To watch and be cognizant of what any of these vampires might do to her.

"What is it," Alandra asked, "What is the tattoo." She had been wondering since the stencil had been placed on her skin.

"It's a griffin. The head and body rest in the center, at your spine, while the wings spread out to your shoulders, the talons holding an A," Angelus told her. Alandra began to fill with anger at hearing the description. It was the same one he had. He had marked her as his.

"You marked me," she spat, "You claimed me like I'm some sort of cattle."

"Yes, because you're mine. And you're under my protection," Angelus told her. Alandra scoffed, watching his reaction carefully. She could see the flash of anger in his eyes and his struggle to fight it and let her disrespect go.

"If I'm under your protection then why have you been torturing me," Alandra asked him, but Drusilla was the one that answered.

"That's how Daddy shows his love," Drusilla said into Alandra's ear, "You mustn't yell at Daddy, or he'll get angry. The storm must remain strong to wipe out the evil."

"What," Alandra asked under her voice, but she knew Angelus and Spike could hear every word.

"Evil is always coming. Plans and plans and more plans for you. The spear is where your power lies. Two knights, two champions. Stars tell of plans and more plans. Ms. Edith says that I'll have to learn how to share," Drusilla said. Alandra was confused, and as Dru spoke more, she became more confused. She didn't know what she was talking about with spears or champions or who Ms. Edith was. Alandra could barely focus past the hunger.

"That's enough Dru," Angelus said, his voice a hiss. Drusilla began to keen in sadness, making Angelus stand up to go over and hug her. Alandra was shocked by the show of affection and turned to look at Spike. She knew that Drusilla was Spike's sire and knew of the convoluted relationship he had with her. He looked hurt and jealous and tension was high in the room.

"Go out and get some dinner for you and Spike," Angelus ordered after he calmed Drusilla down. She nodded before standing up and running her cool fingers down Alandra's face. She moved gracefully out for the room, leaving Alandra alone with the other two vampires.

"Are you hungry lover," Angelus asked. Alandra remained silent and watched him as he grabbed some water and fruit and cheese.

"We need to slowly get you back onto solid food, this should be ok," Angelus said to no one in particular.

"You keep calling me lover," Alandra began, "Why? The only lover I know you have in this town is the slayer." Alandra took satisfaction in the disgust Angelus held for himself in that moment.

"Let's not ruin your meal by talking about that bitch," Angelus replied, but Alandra knew a command when she heard it, and now that she had more freedom, she was going to utilize it.

"What, you don't like thinking about where your dick has been? It must burn you to know you fucked a slayer, doesn't it," Alandra continued, ignoring the warning growl Angelus sent her way.

"That's enough Alandra," Angelus growled, his hands shaking with the force of his restraint to not hit her for her insolence.

"It's understandable, really. You fucked your mortal enemy, and not the person it sounded like you really wanted. That must be eating you up inside," Alandra continued. She was slightly startled at the sound of laughter that was coming out of Spike.

"She's not wrong mate," Spike said through his laughter, wiping the tears of laughter out of his eyes.

"No, she's not. But she should still learn how to respect her elders," Angelus hissed.

"Sorry grandpa, I forget how old you are. Having any hip problems lately," Alandra joked, making Spike laugh even harder. Angelus suddenly grabbed Alandra by her throat, gently squeezing to cut off her air supply. It was just enough to make her struggle to breath.

"I could snap your pretty little neck right now if I wanted," Angelus said, his voice taking on a husky tone.

"Do it," Alandra whispered as she looked into his gleaming eyes, "I'd much rather die then have to look at your face ever again."

"You don't want to look at the man that you love anymore? But we were just getting started," Angelus said, loosening his grip slightly.

"You're not the man that I love," Alandra replied. Angelus guffawed at her words.

"You think he and I are different? We're two halves of the same whole. I'm a part of 'im and e's apart of me," Angelus said, his Irish brogue of long ago slipping in.

"I know. He'll always have you inside him, telling him to do things he knows he shouldn't do, tempting him. And that's why I love him. He can control his impulses, he ignores the little voice in his head egging him on. He's stronger than you'll ever be because of it," Alandra said to him. Angelus snarled before releasing her throat, pushing her away from him.

"You're _friends_ don't care about you," Angelus told her, "They're leaving you to rot in this place while they try to find a way to restore the soul. They don't care if you live or die here, just as long as they get back their precious Angel." Alandra was silent for a long while, feeling the last piece inside of her breaking. She always figured that they wouldn't care, but she had a little sliver of hope left, and his words destroyed it.

"If you're trying to break my spirit you don't have to try anymore," Alandra said, her voice cold, her face expressionless, her eyes dead, "I don't have a spirit left to break. It left a long time ago."

It unnerved Spike to see Alandra like that, to see someone who had so much life before look so dead inside. He could tell hearing that no one was coming for her was the last straw, but she also looked like she had been expecting it, like she had just been waiting for that moment of Angelus to confirm her own thoughts. He looked to Angelus and saw the gleeful look in his eyes. That was what Angelus had been waiting for, the moment she broke.

~0~0~

"Come on pet. We're going to go for a stroll," Spike said, rolling into Alandra's room. Her prison.

"Come on what? I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm kind of cuffed to a bed," Alandra replied.

"Angelus thinks it would be a good idea to get you up and about for a bit, get some fresh air," Spike told her, settling his wheelchair beside the bed.

"Well, I don't think I can even fucking stand up, let alone stroll. So that nixes that plan, doesn't it," Alandra said. She turned over, the wings of the griffin now facing him. Spike rolled his eyes before rolling to the foot of the bed and released her ankle from the heavy metal chains. Alandra looked down at him, a glare in her eyes, but they weren't full of fire like before.

"Come on, set yourself in old Spike's lap and we'll go get some fresh air," Spike said to her. He rolled to the side her face was looking, a smirk on his face, challenging her.

"If I wasn't going to go before, I'm definitely not going now," Alandra said before rolling around to the other side again. Spike released a growl of frustration then moved his wheelchair to the other side.

"Am I that horrible? Don't want a cripple for company, is that it," he spat out, his own frustrations with himself coming out.

"Yes, you are that horrible. No, I don't want a cripple for company. I don't want any company. I don't want to see any of your faces. I just want to be left alone, since I'm going to die anyway," Alandra told him. When she turned over in the bed for the third time, Spike placed his arms around her waist and dragged her out of the bed and onto his lap. Alandra was still too weak to try to fight him off, but she wriggled around in the hopes of him releasing her.

"I suggest you stop wiggling like that luv, or you'll be feeling a bump down there that I don't think you want to have to take care of," Spike whispered huskily into her ear. Alandra stilled, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I know you wouldn't dare," she replied, "Angelus would have your hide."

"At least I'll be dusted having a good time," Spike said. He chuckled under his breath then wheeled them out the door. Alandra's senses were assaulted. Everything smelt crisp and clean with a hint of death underneath, the air cool against her skin, making goose bumps rise. As they continued to roll down the hallways, Alandra began to relax against Spike, closing her eyes and allowing the sounds and smells to settle over her.

Spike noticed the way she relaxed against him and was amazed. Even despite everything, she was still able to trust him enough to relax, to be able to rest her body against his. He enjoyed having her warm body on him, it made him feel alive in a way Dru was never able to do. He missed touching someone, and being touched. Ever since he got landed in the wheelchair, Dru treated him like the child she thought he was and spent all of her time with 'Daddy'.

"We'll go outside so you can look up at the stars," Spike told her, his voice soft so as not to break the trance she had placed her self. Alandra nodded before leaning back and resting her head against his shoulder. Spike took that moment to look her over. Her wounds were healing perfectly, no infection in sight. The cuts were either scabs or pink scars, and one of the older gashes that had stitches would need to have them removed soon. Her body would be covered in scars, but other than that there would be no lasting damage. It was her soul that would carry it all.

"I'm stupid," Alandra said in a soft whisper. Spike almost missed her words, but he heard them, and wondered what would make her think that way.

"What makes you say that pet," he asked, curious as to where her mind had gone.

"I fell in love with a man that not only was seeing someone else but who is also a 200 year old vampire. I'm just a stupid, pointless teenager that always let's her heart lead her head. Buffy was right," Alandra said. Spike's eyes widened at hearing the Slayer's name, and wondered what she was going on about.

"What are you bloody going on about," Spike asked.

"One night Buffy and I got into an argument. She said I was pointless and only good for the latest fashion tips. That I never have and never will amount to anything. I was stupid for thinking I could. For thinking I could make a difference by fighting with the good guys. Why do you think they left me behind," Alandra explained. She sounded so dejected that Spike wanted to hold her and tell her that she was wrong. He was drawn to her, and he didn't know why. It was a pull stronger than what he felt with Cecily, with Drusilla.

_Two knights, two champions._

The words slithered through his mind, but he quickly pushed them away.

"They left you behind because they're scared little piss ants that can't tie their own shoe strings together without help from that bloody oaf of a watcher. It has nothing to do with you," Spike told her. The words weren't getting to her though. Memories were running through her mind. Fear, sadness, hurt. They seemed to be her constant companions, and she felt so tired.

"I'm tired Spike," she said, looking up at the night sky, "I'm tired of living. I'm tired of being pointless."

"You're not bloody fucking pointless Alandra. And if I hear another word about this 'tired of living' crap I'm going to shove food down your throat till you puke. Is that clear," Spike commanded. Alandra tilted her head back to look at Spike, a small smile on her face. Spike looked down at her, a single brow arched, waiting for her reaction. Her lips sputtered, trying to contain her laughter, but failing. An image of a wheel-chair bound Spike feeding her food till she didn't want anymore. She found the entire thing humorous.

"What's so fucking funny, eh," Spike asked, but he actually enjoyed the sound of her laughter. It sounded a little crazed, but she needed to laugh, even if it didn't reach her eyes.

"You're funny," Alandra replied. Her laughter subsided into giggles, quieting down. The air seemed to suddenly change, charged with tension as Angelus stepped out from the shadows.

"I'm glad to see my girl finally enjoying herself," Angelus said, a bright smile on his face. He stepped towards the couple in the wheelchair from the shadows. He had been watching their interaction and knew it had been a good idea to let Spike deal with her.

"I was until you showed up," Alandra replied, making Spike snort. Angelus glared at his childe before settling his eyes back on Alandra. Suddenly he grabbed her by the arm and pulled her out of Spike's lap. Her legs were too weak to carry her weight, making her crash to the cold stone floor.

"Stand up," Angelus ordered. Alandra brought her body up with her arms, her muscles straining to do anything, looking up at Angelus with a blank expression.

"I said stand up Alandra," Angelus repeated. Alandra clenched her teeth in pain as she used every muscle to stand up. She slowly brought one leg up, placing her foot solidly on the ground. She growled as she pushed up, her body slowly rising. Soon she brought her other leg up, making that foot connect with the ground. She swayed from side to side, but she was standing.

"Now you can stand. Soon you can walk. You won't be needing Spike's help anymore," Angelus said coldly.

"Careful Angelus, you almost sound jealous," Alandra teased.

"Don't taunt me little girl," Angelus said, walking up to her and wrapping a hand around her throat and lifting her up off her feet. Alandra just allowed herself to hang in the air, her thin and weak body not even attempting a fight.

"Kill me. Do it. I dare you," Alandra told him, making her words sound like a taunt, but really she was begging him.

Tears began to well in her eyes at the thought of having to be around him anymore, "I'm so tired. Just kill me."

"What would be the fun in that," Angelus asked before letting go, making her crash down to the ground once again.

"Get her back up to the room," Angelus said to Spike, "And after that I want you to stay away from her." Angelus swaggered out of the small courtyard, leaving the two alone.

"Looks like our fun together has ended," Spike said, leaning down and helping Alandra back into his lap. Spike was surprised by the strong grip she had on his shirt front, looking up to see a wild look in her eyes.

"Don't leave me alone with him," she whispered, "I can't be brave alone. I only said what I did because you're here. You give me strength. Please, don't leave me alone with him again. I can't, I can't, I can't." She repeated the words over and over again, tears streaming down her face. Spike held onto her tightly, murmuring soothing words under his breath, trying to calm her. Her sobs rang through the entire mansion, and neither of them noticed the grotesque, gargoyle like statue that stood tall in the center of the living room as he rolled her back to her prison.


	10. Chapter 10

Angelus was trying to raise Acathala, the hell dimension demon, and Spike could not wrap his head around why that seemed a good idea to his sire at all. He had even kidnapped the watcher to tell him what he needed to do to raise him, since his last attempt failed so miserably. Sending everyone to a hell dimension did not sound like a good time to Spike, leading him to the large living room of the mansion every night to look at the grotesque stone figure. Every plan Spike came up with in his mind to get out of it sounded horrible, and all because of one factor; Alandra. He had come to care for the young woman, amazed at her strength and beauty. She carried a light within her that Spike was drawn to, and even though she walked around the mansion like a ghost, he could see it flickering, just waiting for the little bit of oxygen it needs to burn brightly. Spike wanted to giver her that oxygen, and he could only think of one way to do it.

"Hello Slayer," Spike said, stepping out from the shadows of the street. He had just knocked out a cop that was after Buffy, allowing them to have some alone time to talk. Buffy immediately set to attacking Spike, punching and kicking him repeatedly. He grabbed her by the arms and pushed her away.

"Will you hold on a second," he growled. Wariness immediately entered his face when Buffy pulled out her stake.

"Hey, white flag here, I quit," he told her, his hands up in surrender.

"Let me clear this up for you. We're mortal enemies. We don't get time-outs," Buffy said, her stake still ready to strike at any moment.

"You want to go around, pet, I'll have a gay old time of it," Spike said, "You want to stop Angel… we're gonna have to play this a bit differently." His face and voice was full of seriousness, and he could tell by the look on Buffy's face that he had her attention.

"What are you talking about," Buffy asked, her voice full of emotion, her eyes looking as if they were beginning to well with tears.

"I'm talking about your ex, pet. I'm talking about putting him in the bloody ground," Spike replied. He still hadn't moved, his hands still raised up in surrender. He slowly lowered them, keeping an eye on the stake Buffy still had held in her hand.

"This has got to be the lamest trick you guys have ever thought up," Buffy said, lowering the stake in frustration.

"He's got your watcher," Spike told her, "Right now, he's probably torturing him."

"What do you want," Buffy asked. She looked dejected, as if she had given up on everything.

"I told you. I want to stop Angel," he said, "I want to save the world." He finished the sentence with a smirk, enjoying the confused expression on Buffy's face.

"Okay. You do remember that you're a vampire, right," Buffy asked him, sarcasm heavy in her voice.

Spike chuckled softly before beginning his explanation, "We like to talk big…vampires do. 'I'm going to destroy the world.'" Spike paused, searching through his pockets for his cigarettes. When he found them in his back pocket he moved back to the police car, sitting on the hood of it.

"It's just tough guy talk. Strutting around with your friends over a pint of blood," he said, pulling the cigarettes out and placing one in his mouth, "The truth is, I like this world. You've got dog racing, Manchester United. And you've got people. Billions of people walking around like happy meals with legs," Spike paused to light the cigarette, taking a small puff before continuing on, "But then someone comes along with a vision. With a real…passion for destruction. Angel could pull it off. Good bye, Piccadilly. Farewell, Leicester bloody Square. You know what I'm saying?"

Buffy looked away from him, annoyed with his words, but he could tell she was thinking it over.

"Okay, fine, you're not down with Angel. But why come to me," Buffy asked him. He stood up from the hood of the police car, smoke seeping out of his nostrils and sliding into the air.

"There's a girl," Spike began, looking down at the ground, "Alandra. I remember you knowing her slayer. I want you to make sure she gets out first. And then Dru and I will be on our way, never to return again."

"Why is Alandra getting out first so important to you," Buffy asked, confused by the vampire's compassion.

"It's not _that _important to me," Spike said, trying to play his compassion off but failing, "She's become a friend of mine and I don't want to see her hurt by what we have to do. She cares about Angel, and seeing him turn to dust, despite everything he's done to her is going to be the last straw for her. Do we have a deal?" Buffy contemplated his words for a moment, wondering how Alandra could bring someone like Spike not just worry about her, but to actually want her to be safe. A vampire without a soul worrying about a simple human being.

"Deal," Buffy said, "Let's go."

~0~0~

"I have a gift for you Alandra," Angelus said as he walked her out of her room and down stairs. He had a light hold on her arm, but she knew that he could grab her and hurt her at a moment's notices. She was wary of the 'gift' he had gotten her. She had no clue what it could entail.

Angelus watched Alandra's face, waiting for the moment she saw the watcher. She had been so cold the last few days and although he wanted to extinguish her fire, the fire that the soul loved so much, he found himself missing it, and longed to see a small reaction on her face. He slowly walked her to the office that housed the watcher, passing the Acathala statue along the way.

"Giles," Alandra cried out, tearing herself out of Angelus's light grip at the sight of the older man. He was tied to a chair, sweat plastering his hair to his head.

"Alandra," he sighed, "Are you real?" Giles's eyes slowly peered open at the sound of her voice, exhaustion and pain marring his features. Alandra was so happy to see him that tears escaped her. She didn't care about showing emotion in front of Angelus for the first time in weeks.

"I'm real Giles, I'm real," Alandra said through sobs. She hugged the man tightly, saddened by the look of despair on his face.

"He's trying to raise Acathala," Giles whispered so softly in Alandra's ear that she was sure Angelus couldn't hear him, "He's trying to send everyone to a hell dimension. You must try to find a way to stop him. Get out and find Buffy."

"What are you two whispering about over there," Angelus asked, walking up to them and pulling Alandra forcefully away from the watcher.

"How to bake a cake," Alandra replied. Her voice and face was completely dead pan, making Angelus smirk. He gripped her arm tightly, making sure to leave bruises. More and more bruises.

"I wanted you to see your beloved librarian before the fun truly began. I would really hate to have to punish you for insolence and leave you out of the party," Angelus said, his voice sweet and innocent. Alandra could hear the underlying threat in his tone.

"Kill him," Angelus said. Alandra flew into a panic at his words. She tried to pull out of Angelus's grip, tears streaming down her face, but he wouldn't let her go. She felt helpless as she watched Angelus's minions step towards Giles, preparing to carry out their master's orders

"No, please, no," she said, her voice pleading, "No, no, no. Why? Why are you doing this?" She screamed the last of the words at the top of her lungs as she realized more and more of what Angelus was about to do.

"He has answers that I need," Angelus said, "He won't give them to me. So I'm going to kill him and find someone else that can give them to me."

"If you want to get your answers, why don't you just have Dru hypnotize him," Spike said from his wheel chair at the door way. Angelus turned towards his grandchilde's direction, a thoughtful look on his face. He had thought of that, but he thought killing the watcher would have been more fun.

"Dru," Angelus called, "Find out the key to releasing Acathala." Dru smiled coquettishly before settling herself in Giles's lap. Alandra watched with sadness as Dru convinced Giles she was his lost love Jenny Calendar. He looked so happy that it broke her heart, knowing that it wasn't real.

"Angel's blood is the key. No one else's," Giles said in a wistful voice. Alandra squeezed her eyes shut tightly, trying to stop the fear and the tears but falling. She didn't understand why Angelus wanted to send everyone to a hell dimension. She couldn't fathom the gain he got from it. She knew he was insane, being locked away by the soul, but she didn't truly realize till this moment how far it had gone.

"Fantastic," Angelus cried happily. He released Alandra's arm before walking quickly to the statue, a large knife already in his hand. He cut deeply into his palm, blood quickly seeping out. Suddenly Angelus is tossed to the side hard. He looks up surprised to see Spike standing over him, punching and kicking him over and over again until Angelus was moment's away from being unconscious.

Alandra watched with wide eyes as she saw Spike stand from his wheel chair to beat Angelus down. Drusilla quickly went to her sire's side, leaving Alandra alone with Giles.

"Let's get you out of here," Alandra said to the older man. She tried to quickly untie him, but her arms were still too weak to do anything.

"Here, I got it," a familiar voice said from the side. Alandra looked up to see Xander making his way over to them. He used a small knife to cut the rope, releasing the watcher. Giles clutched onto the younger man, his body shaking from exhaustion and exertion.

"We need to get out of here," Xander told them before leading them out to the main living room. Alandra saw as Spike carried Drusilla in his arms out the back door way to the desolate garden. She heard the clink of metal on metal and turned to find Buffy battling with Angelus.

"Get Giles out of here," Alandra ordered Xander. Xander stopped in his tracks, Giles's arm around his shoulder's to hold the older man up. Xander was hesitant about leaving her. Buffy told him to get her out, and that's what he was going to do.

"I'm not leaving here without you Alandra," Xander told her. She felt a heat spread across her body, renewing her body with power and strength. She could feel her muscles sewing back together, her skin healing. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, and she wanted it spread and burn.

"Leave now," she said, her voice a bellow that rang through out the entire mansion. Xander didn't know what it was, but there was something in Alandra's eyes that made him follow her order. The grey blazed with anger and force. A power had swept over him. It felt old and something not to be trifled with.

He nodded, taking a stronger hold on Giles and escaping out the front door and leaving everyone else to battle Angelus. Alandra waited till she was sure that they had left to turn around and see what was happening.

Alandra saw Angelus knock Buffy down, his sword above her head ready to make the final blow, his voice mocking. Alandra had stomped towards them and found herself grabbing Buffy's sword out of her hand, as if her body was not her own. Angelus looked surprised, but fought with Alandra. Swords clashed as Alandra easily began beat him back.

"You're not supposed to know how to fight with a sword," Angelus said, barely able to keep Alandra's attacks at bay. She struck blow after blow, the clanging of the swords loud in the now quiet mansion. Alandra remained silent, but looked towards the statue to see a large red swirling vortex forming at it's mouth. Alandra lifted her sword, ready to drive it through Angelus when a bright white light enveloped up him. She immediately knew what was happening; his soul was returning. She was so surprised that she cut a long gash in her hand with the sword, blood quickly seeping out of the wound.

"Alandra," Angel said. He sounded disoriented and scared. She stepped closer to him so that they were barely a breath's width away from each other.

"Angel," she said, almost in awe. She grabbed his bloody hand with her own, not seeing the golden light that formed around their joined hands and working it's way up through both their bodies before disappearing at their hearts.

"I don't remember anything. What's going on," Angel asked. Alandra released a deep sob at his words. He wiped away her tears with his thumb, tears streaming down his own his face. She looked up at him, memorizing his features and praying to whatever was out there to forgive her for what she was about to do.

"Close your eyes," Alandra said, gently running her hand down his face to have him cover his eyes. Her sobs became more forceful as she watched the red vortex get larger and larger, the world's impending doom coming ever closer.

"I love you," she whispered before driving the sword through his chest. Angel's eyes flew open, shock and pain clear on his face as she pushed him into the swirling red to be swallowed whole. All of her strength leaving her, Alandra collapsed to her knees, dropping the sword to her side. She was surprised by the light touch of a hand on her shoulder, looking up at the sad face of Buffy through her tears. The sobs hit her body even more as Buffy kneeled beside her, holding Alandra close to her.


	11. Chapter 11

It had been almost over three months since Angel left. Almost three months since she killed him and sent him to hell. She had stayed with her father in LA over that time, trying to get her thoughts and feelings in order for the next school year. For when she had to face everyone again and the thought of having to do that terrified her. She couldn't help but think that they hated her for what she done.

And then when she returned, she found out that Buffy had left without a trace. Leaving them slayer-less once again. So that's how Alandra picked up the slack, going out on patrols, trying to tap into the energy and power she had gotten during her fight with Angelus, but never able to get it back.

She would often think about that night. How she felt her heart break into a million pieces at the sight of Angel's shocked and pain-filled face fall into the red void, sent to hell forever. She condemned him to an eternity of suffering, as if he hadn't been through enough as it was.

She also thinks about the relieved look on her cousin's face at the sight of her, and never asking her where her new scars or tattoo came from. The scars that riddled her body, making her once clear skin a canvas that told the story of nightmares. She wore it all with pride, the marks Angelus gave her, but she still wakes up some nights screaming, feeling the hot slice of the knife into her skin, his cool hands slapping her till her face was numb. The evil that wore Angel's face that wanted to break her, to drive her insane as retribution for being locked away by the soul.

She would also get other types of dreams. Dreams where her body felt like it was on fire, and all she could feel was fear and pain and regret. She knew they weren't from her time with Angelus. They were completely different. As if it wasn't from her own body but somebody else's that was going through torment.

All of these thoughts led her back to the mansion one night. It was just before school was supposed to start again and Buffy was still nowhere to be found. Dust had begun to settle on everything, the moonlight casting an ethereal glow on everything. It felt so empty now, simply a shell of what it had used to be. Alandra was thankful to see the Acathala statue gone, wondering where Giles had relocated it to, but her mind was quickly being drawn back to her dreams of fire and torment. Her skin felt hot, making her break out into a sweat, her heart beginning to race for no known reason. She didn't understand why she had been drawn back to the mansion, or why her body was going through what it was going through, and quickly ran out and back home, not hearing the soft yell of pain and fear as she left.

~0~0~

"Hello Alandra," Giles said to her warmly as she stepped into the library. It was the first day of school and unlike what everyone had been hoping for, Buffy still hadn't arrived.

"Hey Giles. How are you," she asked. But she knew the real answer. She can still see the pain in his eyes, the ghost of Jenny Calendar forever haunting him.

"I'm very well Alandra. I hope your summer was pleasant. How is your father doing," Giles asked. He was putting books and various knick knacks away in their proper places, but she knew he was paying attention to her every word.

"He's doing well. Was a little bit on the overprotective side, you know, after everything that happened a few months ago, but other than that he was being his usual self and making horrible jokes," Alandra replied. She smiled at the shocked look on Giles face at the mention of her imprisonment.

"What did he saw about everything that happened," he asked, stopping everything that he had been doing and stepped towards her. Alandra hadn't told her father what exactly happened to her. All he knew was that she had been missing and she had been through a lot. He didn't push her though. She knew he was waiting for the day she would finally be well enough to tell him, but she didn't think she ever would. She loved her father, but he was not a part of this life, and she wanted to keep it that way.

"At first he was angry, understandably. Not at you or anyone else, he doesn't blame anyone. He was just angry that I had to go through it alone. And then he would check in on me at the most random moments, to make sure I was still there. And then he would try to convince me over and over again to move back to LA with him," Alandra told him. Giles pulled his glasses off to wipe the lenses before replacing them, giving her a thoughtful look.

"And why won't you move back to LA with him. Unlike some of the rest of us, you have a choice to get out of this place and move on with your life," Giles said. Alandra smiled brightly at him. It was a smile that had taken her months to get back, and it still hadn't completely reached her eyes, and it still wasn't quite as bright as it used to be, but it was closer than she had been and that was all that mattered to him.

"What type of person would I be if I just up and left," she said, both knowing that was a crack at Buffy.

"I didn't ask to know about all of this supernatural stuff Giles. I didn't ask to meet you guys, or Buffy, or Angel. But I know, deep in my gut that I was meant to be here. I was meant to help fight whatever evil comes this way. And knowing that, I could never just quit. I'm not a quitter, never have been, never will be," she said. She was surprised to see Giles's eyes water, but just enough to make his eyes appear glassy. Her smile was softer but much more genuine when she gave him a hug. Giles returned it, not awkwardly like he normally would. When she pulled away he cleared his throat before removing his glasses once again to clean them before replacing them.

It was comfortably silent in the library after words, Alandra helping Giles replace books and various things to their proper places. She had a couple of free periods before lunch, so she decided to use that time to help the Scoobies. The library was almost completely cleaned, Xander, Cordelia, Willow, and Oz all came blowing in.

"Hey Giles, Alandra," Xander said before sitting with Cordelia at one of the long tables. Willow smiled brightly at them while Oz just nodded before sitting down as well.

"Have you heard any leads about Buffy yet Giles," Willow asked, her voice and face full of hope. Giles looked guilty as he shook his head in the negative.

"Not yet, but I do have people all over looking. We'll find her soon," Giles told them in a reassuring tone. Alandra looked at all of their faces and saw that Xander and Willow looked the most hopeful. Buffy was their best friend, and they had a belief in her that only they could. Cordelia look skeptical, and Oz was blank. But it was different than Angel's blank expression. With Angel you could tell that he was trying to hide his true feelings, but with Oz it seemed as if he understood that sometimes showing anything was just unnecessary.

Alandra wanted to have hope that Buffy would return, and soon. But as more and more timed moved on she became less and less hopeful. They needed the slayer there, and if Buffy didn't return soon she had no clue what they were going to do.

~0~0~

Alandra was on a patrol with the Scoobies. While the two couples worked together, Alandra was walking the cemeteries, taking out fresh vamps as soon as possible. She had just decided to finish her rounds and had made her way back to the Bronze where the rest of the gang had ended up, enjoying the night air outside. Her hair, longer now, blew in the slight breeze, like a gentle caress. She closed her eyes for a moment, imagining Angel was before her, his small amused smile on his face, telling her that she was being stupid and should stop going on patrols. But he would never mean it. He would know that she felt that she had to do it, and continue doing it no matter what. The image soothed her and yet saddened her at the same time. Because whenever she thought about him standing before her, she would begin to wonder how long it would take before seeing him would be a little bit harder to remember. How long before she forgot the sound of his voice, his laugh, his smile, his eyes, the way he walked. How long before she forgot him completely and he was merely a whisper of a memory on her mind.

"Hey," a female voice called in warning, "Look out!" Alandra's eyes flew open to see a vampire approaching her. She could tell by his suit and dirt that clung to him that he had just risen from the ground. She was mildly surprised by the sight of Buffy running towards her, but she was too far away to get to her before the vampire did.

"You smell delicious," the vampire hissed, a cruel smirk on his face. Alandra groaned in annoyance before whipping her fist right into the bottom of his chin.

"Why do you all start out that way," she asked before punching his right then left cheek. He growled and raised his arms to attack back but she was too fast for him, bringing her foot high into the air and slamming it right on top of his head. He fell a couple of steps back, disoriented, allowing Alandra to kick him in the chest into a fence and pulling out her stake, shoving it right into his heart. A shocked look came over the vampire's face before crumbling to dust to be blown away by the wind. Soon Willow and Xander came crashing out of an alley way, trying to contain another vampire.

"Do you guys want some help," Alandra asked, crossing her arms and smirking in amusement. Oz and Cordelia came running out next, holding stakes to stab the vampire but none of them were able to get him still enough to drive the stake home.

"Nah," Xander grunted out as he took a punch to the gut, "We've got it." Alandra chuckled, watching as Xander and Oz began to wrestle the vampire for Willow and Cordelia to stake. Buffy slowly walked up to her, awe and what looked like a little bit of hurt on her face.

"Guess I wasn't as needed as I thought," Buffy said under her breath. Alandra looked at the other girl but remained silent as they watched the group finally get vampire still enough for Willow to stake.

"Buffy," Willow cried, quickly running to her long lost friend and giving her a hard hug. Buffy smiled and returned it before releasing Willow just to be engulfed in another hug by Xander.

"We missed you so much," Xander said, a bright smile also on his face, pulling away just enough to look down at her face.

"Well they did," Cordelia snarked from the side, "I was actually thinking how much nicer it was here in Sunnydale without you."

"I missed you too Cordelia," Buffy replied, amusement clear on her face. Cordelia smirked at her before trying to get the vampire dust off.

"It's good to see you Buffy," Alandra said, smiling softly at the other girl. The air was tense between them, something Alandra never thought about whenever she had wished for the slayer to return.

"New skills Alandra," Buffy said, gesturing to the pile of dust from the vampire Alandra had slain earlier.

"My dad thought it would be best if I got some training before I returned to Sunnydale. But nobody could replace you," Alandra replied. Buffy looked deep into her eyes, both understanding what Alandra was trying to convey. Buffy was the chosen one, she would always be needed and wanted.

"I'm going to start heading home guys," Alandra said, smiling softly at the group before heading out of the alley way and went in the direction of home. Everyone waved goodbye and smiled, but she could see the worried glances in their gaze as she turned to leave.

"She's seems more," Buffy began, trying to find the right word to say.

"Subdued," Oz supplied, making Buffy nod in agreement.

"Yea, subdued," Buffy said.

"Makes sense," Cordelia replied, "She was tortured for a month by the person that was supposed to be her best friend. I think she deserves to be more than 'subdued'." Everyone looked at Cordelia, shocked by her crassness.

"Cordy," Xander hissed, trying to get her stop talking but she refused.

"You all act as if she was about to break. I have actually taken the time to just talk to her and I know that she doesn't want that. She wants be treated like she's still Alandra," Cordelia told them. She noticed the confused look on Xander and sighed, waiting for him to ask whatever he was about to ask.

"So she wants to be treated like nothing happened? I thought that was what we were doing," Xander said. Cordelia proceeded to give him a swift slap on the back of his head.

"No dummy," Cordelia told him and opened her mouth to finish her statement but Buffy cut her off.

"She doesn't want to be treated like a victim," Buffy said, "She just wants to be treated like a regular human being but she also doesn't want to erase what's happened to her because it's apart of who she is now."

"Exactly," Cordelia said, her voice full of exasperation.

"So we just need to stop walking around on egg shells around her and treat her like Alandra," Willow said, her voice cheerful, "That shouldn't be too hard. She's helped us a lot since she came back."

"She was able to take out a vampire alone. It was pretty amazing to watch," Buffy admitted. She was distant, her thoughts revolving around the girl that loved her boyfriend. The girl that sent Angel to hell.

"She asked to take some martial arts lessons," Willow told Buffy as they made their way out of the alley finally and to their respective homes.

"She works mostly by herself though. Lets us do what we what we want to do unless we need help," Xander said, wrapping an arm around Cordelia's shoulders.

"Apparently her dad wanted her to move to LA with him, but she refuses. I'm surprised that he just doesn't come here and get her. It feels like she's on her own a lot, having to make decisions for herself and stuff," Willow continued on, becoming thoughtful. Buffy began to wonder about Alandra's past and why she hadn't just left. She has the chance to live a normal life, away from all this, something Buffy had always wanted, and she won't take it. That thought made Buffy angry and frustrated for some reason. Like Alandra was wasting something. Buffy also couldn't help but blame her for everything that had happened. Everything had begun to go downhill since Alandra came into her to life, and she felt like no one else was to blame for anything but her.

~0~0~

Alandra woke up later that night hot and sweaty. The sheets clutching to her body, trapping her beneath them as she tried to rip them off to open the window for a any sort of breeze to cool her off. Her breathing was heavy and her heart was racing as her mind began to remember her dream. As the days passed and the longer she stayed in Sunnydale, the less her dreams were about her times at the mansion and more of fire and burning and torment. All she felt in these dreams are pain and guilt and the burning of her skin. She can see the flames, but she knew they weren't through her own eyes.

Those dreams weren't hers, the memories weren't hers, but she didn't know who's they were.


	12. Chapter 12

It had been over a week since Buffy had returned, and Alandra had decided to hang up her slayer boots for a while and just trying to sort out her feelings. She still helped on occasion, but kept mostly to the library to help Giles and Willow with research. She still did tai chi every morning, the only thing able to calm her mind down enough to allow it to function for the day. Her nightmares of being in fire and torment were becoming less like dreams and felt more like reality with every passing day.. She always woke up feeling trapped and like heat had begun to burn her skin down to her bones.

She had also begun to make regular trips to the mansion. She felt her skin crawl and her heart at peace at the same time whenever she visited. She would stand in the center of the main living room where she fought Angelus, closing her eyes and imagining Angel standing before her, holding her hand and reassuring her that she had done the right thing. She could even hear his voice in her ear sometimes, her name a mantra on his lips. She felt his presence in the room, not like a faded memory like everything else, but as if he was standing on the other side of a veil, being hidden away from her. The presence was thick and surrounding her like a hug. She would smile sadly then, feeling soothed by whatever the presence was.

And then she would hear the screams in the distance. Those always shocked her back to reality. She would search the large house for hours, trying to find the origin of the screams, but they always sounded the loudest where the Acathala statue stood. The same presence that soothed her would turn desperate, as if it was trying to reach out to her and pull itself out of the pain and fear it was in. She would always feel the tears forming, wondering if Angelus had succeeded in his plan to make her insane after all. The screams sounded so painful. As if they were being ripped out of the person's throat, and she just wanted it to stop, to help, but she didn't know how. She didn't know how to stop the far off screaming that sounded loudest where Angel was sent to hell.

~0~0~

"Hey Alandra," Willow said cheerfully as she walked into the library. Alandra smiled at her as she continued to place books back on their proper shelves.

"So Buffy is having a get-together tomorrow night," Willow began. Alandra remained silent, but she had an idea of where this was going. She couldn't help but feel amused as Willow tried to invite her in the most polite way possible. She glanced at her friend and saw how nervous she seemed, but was enjoying her discomfort too much to give her an out.

"And Xander thought it would be a great idea to throw a party and I was wondering if you would like to come," Willow said all in one breath, but Alandra was able to discern her words. Alandra looked at Willow, her eyes twinkling and lips trembling with concealed laughter.

"Does Buffy and her mother know you're throwing a party at her their place for Buffy," Alandra asked, stepping away from the shelves and walking closer to the red head.

"No, but we thought it would be good to have a welcome back for her after being gone for so long," Willow told her. Alandra couldn't help but laugh. She just imagined Buffy and her mother standing in the center of their living room watching as high school students rocked out and threw trash and food everywhere, basically utter chaos.

"Wouldn't you guys rather just spend time with Buffy and enjoy her being back for a while? Have a dinner and a movie night or something," Alandra said. She watched and waited for Willow's reply. She could tell by the look on her face that they were doing the party for a very specific reason, and it wasn't necessarily to welcome Buffy back.

"Nah, I think this is a great way for her to get back in the saddle," Willow replied in her usual cheerful tone. Alandra raised a brow in question, skeptical of what they were about to do, but knew there wouldn't be a true way to stop them.

"I supposed I can make time in my busy schedule of eating and sleeping to go tomorrow night," Alandra joked. Willow laughed lightly, usually bright smile falling slightly and beginning to look forced. Alandra could tell that she was about to say something that she really didn't.

"I know we're not that close," Willow began, her innocent eyes becoming wide with emotion, "But you know you can talk to me if you ever need to. I'm always here for you." Alandra looked deep into Willow's eyes and couldn't help but feel loved. All she saw was sincerity and worry for her well being. Just knowing she had someone to talk to that knew about what had happened to her lightened her heart immensely. Her cousin and father knew that she had been through something traumatic and life changing, and reluctantly agreed to not have her go to a counselor to talk it out. She knew the moment she mentioned vampires and hell demons she would be sent to the loony bin, and she did not want that.

"Thanks Willow," Alandra said, giving her a small but truly genuine and happy smile. It was probably the most genuine of smiles she had had in a long time. Willow smiled back. A smile so bright it seemed to light up and chase away some of the darkness that had taken root in Alandra's heart. Willow had a way of chasing away the darkness and filling you with warmth with just her smile, and it was something that Alandra appreciated greatly.

"Of course, I'll catch you later," Willow replied before grabbing her books and bag and running out of the library. Alandra simply stood in the middle of the room, her thoughts taking her over for a moment. She felt a deep longing in her heart for Angel, making tears spring to her eyes. She hadn't heard the heavy footsteps of Giles, but she wasn't startled when she opened her eyes to find him standing beside her.

"I've spoken to Buffy," the older man began. Alandra stayed silent, never looking at him as she waited for him to continue.

"She won't tell me what happened that night. Only that everything had been taken care of," he said, but he his words were met with more silence. Flashes of memory appeared in Alandra's mind. Sword fighting with Angelus, Angel's soul returning, his shocked face as she pierced him with the sword and her whispered words that only two other people have heard her say, the man she loved and damned to hell, and the woman that he loved and damned to loneliness. She continued to stand there, debating whether or not to tell Giles what really happened that night, and knew that she wasn't ready to admit what she had done.

"Sometimes things are just better to be let go and forgotten," Alandra finally said. She looked up at the clock and knew it was nearly time for lunch. She wanted to get out of there as fast as she could to avoid the topic further. Giles sighed and removed his glasses to clean them before replacing them as was his habit.

"And sometimes the only way to do that is to talk about it," he replied, watching as she walked to a chair at one of the long tables to grab her backpack and books. When she looked up a him all she saw was worry and couldn't help but smile softly at him.

"I'm going to go and head towards the cafeteria for lunch," she said, "I'll catch you later Giles." Without another word said between the two of them she walked swiftly out of the library, leaving the older man to his thoughts once again.

~0~0~

The party was in full swing when Alandra arrived the next night at the Summers' home. Oz and his band were playing a set in the living room, allowing for people to get up and dance. Alandra was immediately squashed between bodies and was trying to find Willow as soon as possible. Just as she was finding it hard to breath amongst the tight mass an opening appeared at the kitchen. Alandra tried to make her body as small as possible to slide through and into the crowded but breathable kitchen.

"Alandra," Willow cried from the doorway, "I'm so glad you could make it." Alandra was mildly surprised by the large hug she received from the red head but hugged her back all the same.

"I'm glad to be here," Alandra replied before looking around at all the people. When Willow had said party she had been expecting twenty people at the most. There was easily fifty squashed into the small house, maybe even more.

"Don't you think you guys went a bit overboard with the people," Alandra asked, an incredulous look coming over her face as someone spilled popcorn all over the counter and floor.

"It kind of snowballed a bit out of control," Willow admitted shyly, also looking around at the people surrounding them. She didn't even know a quarter of the people there.

"I would say it's an avalanche," Alandra joked before turning and getting a coke for herself. She sipped it gingerly before following Willow out of the safety of the kitchen and back into the throng of people.

"Alandra," a light voice said from the side. Willow and Alandra turned around to find Buffy standing, a disbelieving look on her face. Alandra could see the tinge of anger as well and couldn't help but stand a bit taller at the sight of the slayer.

"Hey Buffy," Alandra said, "Willow invited me, I hope that was ok." Alandra couldn't help but feel the angry heat swipe over her body. She could feel her defenses kicking in. She knew Buffy would most likely blame her for what she had done, but she never expected the anger and hate that had begun to fill the girl's gaze every moment she looked at Alandra.

"Yea," Buffy replied, "I guess." All Alandra could do was nod. The air felt thick with tension around the trio, everyone else seemingly able to either escape or just ignore what was happening in the living room. Alandra had never been so thankful to see an adult as when she saw Mrs. Summers stomp up to them. Alandra could see that the older Summers woman was also angry, her shoulders high and her body tense as she gripped onto a dish towel.

"Buffy. We need to talk," Mrs. Summers said, completely ignoring the two other girls.

"Can we talk later mom," Buffy asked, her anger turning to fear. Alandra had no idea how things were going between the two women, but by the look on Buffy's face, she would have to guess not very good.

"No, we're going to talk now and you're going to listen to me," Joyce Summers said, her voice so loud that it halted the entire party, making all eyes fall on them. Alandra wanted to move away but was afraid of drawing even more attention to herself than there already was.

"Now I have been trying to be understanding and patient, but there is a limit to what I can ignore," Joyce told her daughter. Buffy stood there completely gob smacked by her mother's words.

"Do you know what you put me through," Joyce continued, "Not knowing if you were safe or even alive? And then when you come back you have this constant chip on your shoulder."

"I'm sorry I can't be same old Buffy," Buffy replied, "Acting as if I haven't been through a lot."

"That's not what I'm saying and you know it," Joyce said. Alandra looked over at Willow and saw the determined look on her face and began to wonder what the red head had planned. She looked around the room and saw the nervous and embarrassed looks on the guests faces, wanting to escape the emotional fight before them. Alandra's eyes finally landed on Buffy's face and saw the turmoil on the other girl's face. The guilt began to build within her and wanted to bend down and beg Buffy forgiveness for everything she had done. It was all her fault that Buffy left, and now it was her fault that Buffy was going through this open and embarrassing situation. It was all Alandra's fault and she couldn't even deny it.

"I've just been having a really tough time, ok," Buffy said, tears welling into her eyes. Alandra looked over to Willow and watched as she stepped towards her best friend.

"You left us Buffy," Willow said, all eyes now landing on her, "You left us alone to fend for ourselves. We had to pick up on your slack, and no that's not ok. You can't run away every time something bad happens. That's not fair to us and you know it."

The tension was high in the room. Alandra debated whether or not to step in and defend Buffy. To say that it was her fault. She was the one to cause all of the torment amongst the group. She wanted to, wanted to let the words fly and lay everything out in the open, but something inside her was stopping her. Nervousness tingled all along her skin, halting her from speaking. She was afraid. Afraid that once everyone knew the truth they would all turn to hate her as Buffy had, and she had just reached a good point in her heart to allow that to happen.

"Alright," Joyce called out to the crowd, "Party is over." Some grumblings began to rumble throughout as people began to gather their things to head home. One of the older students opened the door, terror and confusion entering their features.

"It's not Halloween tonight is it," she asked another student who shook their heads no.

"Then why are they all dresses up as zombies," she asked. Buffy, Willow, and Alandra all heard the other students words and quickly ran to the front door to find zombies surrounding the house.

"We need to barricade the doors and windows," Buffy said loudly so that everyone was loud enough to hear her. All of the teenagers set to work, grabbing various pieces of furniture to go in front of anything the zombies could come in through. It wasn't too long till they began to break through wood and glass, sending everyone into a frenzy. Some people ran to hide, some people ran to try to get out of the house, some began to grab make shift weapons to beat the zombies back.

"We need to get to your weapons Buffy," Alandra said, out of breath from trying to beat back various decayed limbs that had been able to break through the door. Buffy nodded before turning to her mother and Willow and Oz.

"We need to get up stairs," Buffy called out to them. They all turned to run up the stairs, finding one of Joyce's friends laying on the ground, her body completely splayed out and still.

"Pat," Joyce cried, running over to her friend. Alandra, Buffy and Oz immediately grab the comatose woman, dragging her into the closest room, frantic as they saw one zombie come up the stairs. Joyce and Willow closed the door, holding it down with their bodies. Alandra helped Buffy and Oz place Pat on the floor, quickly noticing that she wasn't breathing. Oz bent over her, placing two light fingers on her neck to check for a pulse.

"No pulse," Oz said, his voice soft but everyone heard his words loud and clear. Joyce released a sad sigh, as if she had suspected all along, but still wanted to cling onto the hope that her friend had survived. Alandra and Buffy straightened to stand up fully, both holding looks of determination on their face.

"We need to go and grab some weapons," Buffy said to the other three. Joyce and Willow nodded, releasing the door to find a zombie just reaching them. Alandra immediately leaped into action, landing a stream of hard punches and kicks to the zombie to distract it enough for Buffy to get to her room. Just as she thought she had trapped it in a corner it swung it's arm right across her head, knocking her to the side. Alandra felt woozy and disoriented as she hit her head hard against the wall, already feeling the pain pound on her cranium. She tried to stand but the blow made it difficult, leaving the zombie to walk into the room holding Willow, Oz, and Joyce.

Giles suddenly appeared in front of her, his wire frames entering her blurry vision.

"Alandra, are you ok," he asked, concern clear on his face and in his voice. She nodded, slowly standing with his help. They heard a scream come from Joyce's room. They ran into it, finding the zombie Alandra had fought holding Willow by the throat, Oz and Joyce trying to pry it's hands off without success. Giles and Alandra attacked it as well. Giles held a large metal weapon, hitting the zombie so hard across the head that it flew off. The rest of the body continued choking Willow who began to turn red, suddenly a large ax fell from the sky onto the arm of the headless zombie, making the hand fall away and the body crumple to the ground.

"Glad you could make it to the party Giles," Buffy said, distaste clear on her face.

"The mask Buffy," Giles said, ignoring her quip, "The one your mother has. It's an Nigerian Zombie Demon named Ovu Mobani. Which ever zombie puts the mask on becomes the demon incarnate." Suddenly they heard dark and deep laughter come from behind them. The whole group turned around slowly, all knowing what that laughter meant. They found the zombie Pat wearing the mask, a cruel smile on it's face. The mask, while probably beautiful hanging on a wall, looked grotesque against Pat's blonde hair and peach colored clothing. It was made out of wood, lines etched deeply across the forehead to make a crown, the eyes slanted and glowing red and purple and the sharp teeth covering Pat's lips. It made Alandra think of the boogey man.

"You are all stupid and pathetic humans," the deep voice said, more dark laughter escaping it. It raised it's arm in preparation for an attack, but Buffy dropped her axe and pushed the demon back until it went out of the window and landing in the back yard. Buffy was soon racing out, leaving Giles to call after her.

"The eyes! You must destroy it's eyes," Giles said, his voice ringing out of the room following Buffy into the hall. All the rest of them could do was sit there and wait, hoping for the best. It was silent, the tiredness from the night clear on everyone's faces. Alandra sighed and slowly sat herself onto the ground, resting her back against the foot of the bed.

"Are you ok Alandra," Joyce asked. Alandra smiled softly and nodded.

"I'm fine, I just have a bump on my head from earlier," Alandra told her. Joyce look unconvinced but said nothing more, falling back into silence again. Alandra knew now was her moment. She could set things straight for Buffy, at least enough to have the others understand it wasn't the slayer's fault.

"It's not her fault," Alandra said, her voice so soft that the others weren't sure if she had spoken. She slowly looked up from her lap into everyone's eyes.

"It's not who's fault," Giles asked, moving closer to her and kneeling down to look her in the eyes.

"Buffy," Alandra replied, "It's not her fault that she left."

"Who's fault is it then," Joyce asked. Her voice wasn't unkind, but the question made Alandra wince all the same.

"Mine," was all Alandra said as an answer. Her eyes fell to her lap once again, fear and nervousness cutting through her veins as she waited for the others' reactions.

"What happened that night Alandra," Giles asked, his voice still understanding but more forceful. She knew that it was wrong of her too keep what happened to herself, but she feared that if they knew what she had done they would hate her. Just as Buffy hated her.

"Something bad. I did something and now everything is upside down. That's all I'm going to say," Alandra replied. Giles sighed before removing his glasses and pinching the bridge of his nose in his usual fashion. Alandra could feel tears welling in her eyes at the almost disappointed look on his face.

"Alandra," Joyce's soft voice said, drawing her attention. Alandra didn't know Joyce well, but she could tell she was a mother who tried to do what was best for her daughter and her friends, and Alandra couldn't help but be jealous that Buffy had that and she didn't. She wondered how much her life would have been different with a mother that cared.

_You would have never met Angel and the others. You would have never been tortured. No vampires or demons. And you would have never fallen in love._

"Buffy leaving was not your fault," Joyce told her firmly, "None of what happened tonight or any other night was your fault. I don't want you to blame yourself for Buffy's actions." Alandra nodded, but for some reason she could get herself to believe Joyce's words.

**A/N: Sorry for the lateness of the update! School and work has been pretty crazy so I haven't been able to update as often as I wanted. Hope you enjoyed the chapter and please don't forget to review!**


	13. Chapter 13

She was at the mansion again. It had been about a week since she had been there last, her imagination running wild and thinking of Angel. She found herself standing in the center of the living area again, the Acathala statue clear in her mind. She realized that whenever she had the dreams of fire and pain were the days that she was drawn the most to that particular spot, making her relive that night over and over again.

She felt the tears begin to fill her eyes and allowed them to fall. She tried not to cry about Angel and what she had done and the guilt she carried with her every where she went, but she always failed. The guilt was eating her up inside, and she didn't know how to stop it.

She felt herself fall to her knees, her palms on the ground as sobs began to wrack her body. She was finally releasing all of her pain and sadness of killing the man that she loved. The man that loved someone else. The man that she damned to hell. As the thoughts swirled more and more around her mind she sobbed harder and harder, till the point her body shook and the keen of her cries high pitched were ringing against the walls. She began to slam her hands against the marble of the floor, trying to get all of her pain and frustration out, wanting to destroy something, anything, to make her feel better.

It took her almost an hour to calm down enough to notice the cut on her hand. It was in the same place that she had cut herself that night, the new wound following along her scar. Blood dripped onto the white floor, staining it red. It didn't feel like her own though. It was as if it was another hand that was cut, a larger hand that seemed to be in the place of her own. She felt no pain as she watched the blood drip slowly down her wrist and onto the ground. She felt it begin to tingle and heat up from the inside out, the sensation moving from her palm and spreading out to her body.

Alandra slowly stood, as the tingling and heat began to intensify and a pull began to form on her belly. It was almost as if a hook had attached itself to her belly button, pulling her forward. The low heat began to turn into a burn, her skin feeling as if it was beginning to melt. She cried out in pain, watching as blisters began to form on her arms and hands. She didn't understand what was going on, but her body wouldn't move. She couldn't run away or leave to find help for relief.

Beside her was loud crack of lightning, a bright white flash, and a whole in the ceiling. The portal whirled, making Alandra's hair fly around her face, the pain becoming so crippling she fell to her knees. She looked down at her bloodied palm and saw that it glowed a bright yellow, the light travelling shining through her veins and skin and tracing it's pathway up her arm to her heart.

Suddenly a body flew out of the portal, completely naked. The portal faded and closed with another bright flash and loud crack, leaving the air in the mansion still once more. The pain had finally dissipated, the blisters fading away before her eyes. As she looked down at her palm, she saw the wound close but the glowing had become brighter. Her eyes widened as she looked at the body that had appeared and saw who it was.

Angel.

~0~0~

"Angel," Alandra whispered, too shocked to move from her spot on the ground. He was breathing heavily, his back moving up and down wildly with the force. He slowly looked up and faced her, his eyes dark. She saw the pain and fear, and the small glimmer of hope. He growled low as his eyes reached her, but Alandra felt no fear.

"Angel," she said again, her voice stronger but gentle, "It's me. Alandra." He didn't move, just watched her, and she made the decision to move towards him. She made sure she was slow and to not make any sudden movements to startle him, her glowing hand the one that was reached out to touch him. He growled louder in warning, slowing her movements even more.

"It's ok," she said softly, "You're safe now." She scooted closer to him till her fingers lightly grazed his shoulders. Sweat slicked his skin, heat radiating off of him. She sat before him, a small smile on his face, feeling more confident as he did nothing. Soon her entire hand was on his back, and she realized the glowing had become brighter where it rested in the place his heart would be. She was so close to him her breath would hit his face, their eyes locked together for what felt like an eternity.

"Angel," Alandra asked, her voice barely above a murmur. She saw the fear and pain begin to ebb away, but the cloudiness that was in his mind clearly remained. She waited, her heart thumping wildly against her chest, her chest nearly heaving from trying to get oxygen to her brain. She couldn't believe that he was there before her. She would have thought it was a dream if it weren't for the fact that she had felt an immeasurable amount of pain earlier.

"Alandra," he said, his voice soft and hoarse. Alandra nodded her head once and yelped in surprise as she was pushed on to her back, his arms wrapping tightly around her. His body shook as he held her, and she could feel tears in the crook of her neck where he buried his face. She felt tears begin to fill her eyes once again, but for the first time in months they were happy tears.

They laid there on the ground for hours, just holding onto each other. It wasn't until much later on that she realized Angel was very naked, and his very naked body was on top of her. Angel moved his head, nuzzling her along her neck and jaw and cheek. Alandra closed her eyes, allowing herself to enjoy the moment, because soon he would come back to his senses and want to go back to his true love; Buffy.

"Let's get you up stairs and get you cleaned up," she said. She began to move to sit up but halted her movements at the deep growl Angel emitted from his chest. He didn't want to move, and would keep her there for as long as possible.

"Angel," she began, trying to get his attention. He growled louder, his nuzzling becoming more insistent, his arms wrapping even tighter around her. She stilled when she felt his face shift from his human face to his demon visage. She tried to calm her heart, but failed as his lips touched her pulse point.

"Angel look at me," she said, her voice stronger and commanding. Angel's head shot up, his yellow eyes looking into her grey.

"I know you're hungry. Let's get you up stairs and cleaned up and then I can go and get you some blood," she told him.

"No," he said, his voice still sounding raw, "We stay here." Alandra couldn't help but feel touched and lifted her hand to gently touch his face. Angel pulled away, but she stopped him by grabbing his face with both hands. She ran her fingertips lightly over the deep ridges of his brow, his yellow eyes glowing with hesitation.

"I'll come back," she told him, "I just want to make sure you get blood. Please." They were silent again, her hands gently holding his face. He looked down at her with such adoration and love that she had no clue where it came from. She couldn't comprehend how he could look at her that way when she had literally sent him to hell.

"Promise," he said. She smiled softly before nodding, but he didn't move and she realized he wanted to hear the words come from her mouth.

"I promise I will come back," she said. Angel suddenly had them up and standing, the movement so fast the air whooshed in her ears. He still held her closely to him, and his lack of clothing was becoming more obvious by the moment. She gave a light kiss to his cheek, which prompted him to loosen his hold on her enough to slip out of his arms finally. When she stepped away she noticed that his left hand, the one that had been cut that night to release Acathala was also glowing a bright yellow all the way from his fingertips to his heart.

Alandra looked down at her hand and touched it to his, the glowing becoming even brighter than before. It was so bright it was nearly blinding. She didn't know what the glowing meant, but as their hands connected she felt more at peace then she ever had. It was if a part of her that she had been missing was finally returned to her. Where before she felt empty, now she felt full of life, a happy warmth spreading through out her body. Angel looked down at their connected hands, his eyes wide, telling her he felt it to.

"I'm going to get your blood. Human blood," she specified, "And then I'm going to go to Giles. He'll be able to tell us what's going on," she finished. Angel's face scrunched up in annoyance and slight anger.

"You promised," he said, the hurt clear in his voice.

"I will be back Angel. When have I ever broken a promise," she asked, a cheeky smile on her lips. Angel smirked and snorted but said nothing more, the glowing completely disappearing when they let go of each other's hands. Although she didn't feel as connected to him as before, his presence was still within her, the warmth still coursing through her body.

"Go get cleaned up. There should still be clothes here, but I'll bring you some more just in case," Alandra said, stepping away from him and towards the front door. She cracked it open, making sure that the sun that was still out wouldn't hit him, before turning to take a last look at him. She still couldn't believe her eyes at the sight of him. He was really there and was really with her. She smiled brightly at him before stepping through the door and leaving to complete her errands.

~0~0~

"Giles, we need to talk," Alandra said as soon as she walked into the library. She barely registered the rest of the Scoobies there, including Buffy.

"What's wrong Alandra," Giles asked, immediately concerned by her abruptness.

"Something happened. Can I talk to you in private," she asked. Giles nodded and began to move to his office, Alandra following him but Buffy's voice halted them.

"If it's that important why can't you tell us," Buffy asked, an angry glint in her eyes. Tension immediately filled the room as the two girls stood off, glaring at each other. Buffy stood before her, her arms crossed in front of her chest, an expectant look on her face.

"I'll tell you after I'm finished talking about it with Giles. For right now it doesn't concern you," Alandra told her, her voice harsh, irritated by the blonde.

"I'm the slayer. If it's life threatening than it does concern me," Buffy replied, stepping closer to Alandra.

"Well it's not life, so you can stay out of it," Alandra said sarcastically.

"Well then why don't you tell everyone about what happened that night instead," Buffy told her. Alandra felt the anger flare through out her body. Her fists clenched by her sides, her body completely still as she stood near the center of the room, all eyes on her.

"I don't think that is necessary Buffy," Giles said, his voice trying to sound like an appeal to her senses but came out more like a command.

"Alandra obviously has something she needs to discuss with Giles," Willow cutting in, "We should let her."

"Why are you doing this Buffy," Alandra asked the other girl. She felt her teeth began to grind against each other when she saw Buffy shrug, trying to be nonchalant about the subject.

"I just think it would be good for you to air everything out. Get it off your chest," Buffy said, a smug look on her face.

"And I think you're acting like a major bitch right now," Cordelia said. Alandra shot her a thankful glance before returning her gaze back to Buffy.

"Tell them Alandra," Buffy said, "Tell them what happened that night."

"That's enough Buffy," Giles spat. Buffy gave the man a wary glance, but held her ground. Alandra took a deep breath to calm the fire that was burning in her belly.

"It's all right Giles," Alandra said, her voice quiet but everyone could hear the emotion, "I'll tell you what happened that night." It was silent once again as they waited with bated breath for Alandra's next words. She looked all around and saw the look on Xander's face. He had been looking away, his features showing the anger at Buffy and the sympathy that he had for Alandra. When he looked up at her finally, she gave him a small nod and smile, trying to reassure him the best she could.

"I had ordered Xander to take Giles out of the mansion," Alandra began, "And saw that Angelus was fighting with Buffy." She paused, taking a deep breath to get her emotions under control. Her hands had begun to shake from nervousness at the other's potential reactions, but she knew that she would have to tell them eventually.

"I don't know what happened, but all of a sudden a power swept through me and when Angelus knocked Buffy down I grabbed her sword and immediately started fighting him myself. It was as if my body wasn't completely my own and I somehow knew how to fight. I've been working so hard lately to see if I can maybe get the power that I felt back, but I so far haven't been able to," Alandra explained. She took another deep breath, looking Buffy deep into her eyes.

"The portal was opening and just as I was about to strike, Angelus got his soul back. Angel was back," her voice broke at the end but she continued on, "He didn't remember what he had done, but the portal was opening so I had no choice but to pierce Angel with the sword and push him into the portal. It closed, crisis averted."

"You sent Angel to the hell dimension," Giles asked. Alandra nodded, looking every where but at their faces.

"The curse had worked," Willow said, making confusion appear on Alandra's face.

"While I was in the hospital I performed the original curse. I had tried before but it hadn't worked. We just assumed it didn't work again the second time," Willow explained. Alandra understood enough to know how Angel got his soul back, but she didn't know how Willow had ended up in the hospital. Giles stepped towards Alandra, placing a heavy and comforting hand on her shoulder, glancing around at the saddened looks on the other students' faces. Alandra looked up at her mentor, thankful he was taking control of the conversation.

"Well now that we've discussed what happened that night, Alandra, why don't you come with me to my office," Giles said to her before turning around to walk towards his office. Alandra nodded, nervousness creeping in at the clear anger on Giles's face. Buffy's face remained expressionless as Alandra turned to walk away, but Alandra saw the sadness in her eyes and couldn't help but feel guilt at what she had done. She followed him slowly back to his office, her steps measured as she tried to calm her racing heart.

"What is it that you wanted to speak to me about Alandra," Giles asked, sitting slowly down into his large brown leather chair. She waited until he was settled before speaking.

"Angel is back," she said. Giles's eyes widened before he removed his glasses in his typical fashion.

"I thought you said you sent him to Acathala's hell dimension," Giles asked, releasing a deep sigh. Alandra could see the tiredness on his face. He looked like he hadn't slept in days.

"I did," Alandra told him, "I was visiting the mansion today; going there had helped me sort out my thoughts. I was kneeling on the ground, and then a wound that I had gotten from that night reopened somehow. And then I started getting a burning sensation along my body, boils began to form, blood going all along the ground. When I looked down at my palm where the cut was began to glow all the way up my arm to my heart."

"What color was the glowing," Giles asked, perking up slightly at hearing the words.

"A bright yellow," she replied, wondering what the significance of the color was. Giles stood suddenly, heading over to a book shelf and grabbing a large and old tome from the shelf.

"You said you felt a burning sensation and your skin began to bubble," Giles asked. Alandra nodded, simply standing and watching as he thumbed through the thin pages.

"What happened after that," Giles asked, looking up and watching her expectantly.

"The portal opened, Angel popped out. The boils disappeared but the glowing was still there. Angel looked disoriented, and as I reached out to touch him the glowing became brighter. Then his arm started glowing yellow too," Alandra explained.

"Is it your left hand that had the cut that glows," Giles asked, when Alandra nodded he spoke again, "Is it Angel's left hand that glows as well? Do you remember if he cut his hand that night as well."

"He did, it was the hand he cut to release Acathala," Alandra told him.

"You touched his cut hand with your cut hand? Do you remember," Giles asked, his voice becoming more insistent.

"I think so. I remember touching his hand the moment after his soul returned, but I don't really remember if it was the ones that were cut," Alandra said. Giles nodded before switching to another book and leafing through the pages of that one. Alandra remained silent, knowing he would be able to find the answers better if he was able to work in peace. She knew that something major had happened by the way he plopped into his chair and sighed, removing his glasses to pinch the bridge of his nose.

"What's going on Giles," she asked, wariness creeping into her voice. Her whole body was tense as she stepped closer to him, waiting in anticipation for his next words.

"I believe you created a very rare and powerful bond with Angel, essentially tying your souls to each other. Were you having dreams before? Like they were memories but they weren't yours," Giles asked. Alandra slowly nodded, too shocked to speak.

"The bond is called _Amoris Viniculum _or translated it quite literally means the Love Bond. It's created through the mixing of blood and an act of true love. There is usually a very precise ritual to perform the bond but some how you were able to create one without it," Giles continued on to explain.

"Is there a way to break it," Alandra asked, her voice soft. So many thoughts were running around in her mind that she couldn't fully concentrate on what he was saying.

"I'm afraid not. At least not one that I know of as of right now," he told her solemnly. Alandra ran a hand through her hair, her eyes wide as she tried to comprehend what Giles was telling her. She had accidently formed an unbreakable bond with Angel. Guilt began to flood her, tears immediately springing to her eyes.

"What have I done," she whispered to herself, the tears slowly slipping down her cheeks.

"Whatever you're thinking right now Alandra, I want you to remember that this is _not _your fault. None of this is your fault," Giles told her, standing and wrapping her in a warm fatherly hug. Alandra took solace in the hug for a moment, but it wasn't nearly as long as she needed.

"I should go and explain everything to Angel. He's still very disoriented from coming back. He didn't want me out of his sight," Alandra told the older man.

"I think that it would be wisest for this to stay between us for now," Giles said.

"I thought so too," Alandra agreed before heading towards the door, "Thanks for everything Giles. I'll talk to you later." Giles nodded and watched her walk out of his office before turning back to the book where he had found the information on the bond.

Alandra will forever be bonded to Angel, tying his soul to hers and hers to his. The bond confirmed everything Giles had suspected for nearly a year now. Alandra loved Angel, but Angel loved Alandra too. The only way to form the bond was an act of true love, an act of true love from both sides. Giles knew there was much more to research that needed to be done and immediately set to work.


	14. Chapter 14

Angel had been pacing the floor, waiting for Alandra to return. He some how knew that she wasn't in danger, but he was set on edge as he felt an influx of emotions that weren't his; mostly guilt, anger, and sadness. He instantly knew that the emotions he was feeling was hers and wished he could go after her, but the sun kept him prisoner. He could remember everything he had done when he lost his soul and his own guilt ate away at him. He wanted to make it right with her as soon as possible.

He could hear her soft footsteps as she walked to the front door, her heart thumping wildly against her chest. When he knew she was going to reach for the knob of the door he stopped pacing and stood still, waiting to see her face. The second she entered he had her wrapped in his arms tightly, enjoying the feel of her body against his.

Alandra gasped when she felt herself being lifted into the air in Angel's arms, but quickly settled to wrap her own around him. She almost had begun to fear that everything that had happened was a dream and that he was still in the hell dimension, but he was there and he was real.

"We need to talk," they said at the same time. Before Alandra would have laughed and claim jinx, telling him that he owed her a soda. Now she simply smiled, her eyes showing the pain and sadness she endured. Angel's heart broke seeing what he had done to someone who used to be so vibrant. She gave him life before, and now he had taken that life away.

"Let me go first," Alandra told him, "It's pretty important." Angel nodded, and as Alandra tried to pull away Angel tightened his hold and walked them over to the couch.

"You can let me go now Angel," she said, clearly annoyed, "I am very able to walk to the couch myself."

"I am very aware little one," Angel replied, "I'm holding you because I missed you, not because I think you're weak." Alandra fell silent at his words, but allowed him to carry her over to the couch. She thought he would simply set her down and sit beside her, but instead he settled her on his lap, still holding her as close to him as possible.

"What did you want to talk about," Angel asked, ignoring her wide eyes and the pitter patter of her heart.

"You haven't eaten yet," Alandra said before lifting the cooler she had carried in with her and placing it on her own lap, opening it up and reaching in to grab a full bag of human blood.

"How did you get that," Angel asked, surprised by the sight.

"Willy owed me a favor. I was able to get you enough for a month. I know you're weak, I can feel it," Alandra said.

"You can feel the bond too then," Angel replied, taking the bag of blood gingerly out of her hand. Alandra nodded before grabbing it again and standing up to head towards the kitchen.

"Let me heat this up for you and then we'll talk," Alandra said to him. She removed herself from his lap, immediately missing the coolness of his body, before heading to the kitchen with the bag of blood and cooler in hand. She was thankful there was a microwave, searching the cupboards for any sort of mug. She made a small triumphant noise when she found them, quickly grabbing one and rinsing it off before opening up the bag of blood and pouring the contents into it. After she placed the large mug of blood into the microwave, she pressed the various buttons to start the heating process, placing the rest of the bags of blood in the refrigerator. She wondered how there was still electricity and running water in the place but decided to push the thought off till later.

She slowly walked back to into the living room where Angel was sitting, warm mug of blood in her hands. She saw the hungry look in Angel's eyes and smiled softly as he struggled to not vamp out into his 'game face' as they referred to it. When she placed the mug into his waiting hands he couldn't hold it back any more and changed into game face, the deep ridges and yellow eyes immediately meeting hers. He looked ashamed at his lack of control so she placed a hand on his shoulder, trying to reassure him.

"Don't look like you're ashamed," she told him, "You have nothing to be ashamed of. Now drink up. I don't want to talk till you've downed that entire mug." Angel nodded, remaining silent as he raised the mug to his lips and gulped the blood down loudly and quickly. He drank so fast that some blood began to dribble down his chin. When he lowered the mug Alandra swiped up the blood with her finger. She was getting ready to wipe it on a towel that was near them, but Angel grabbed her wrist. Grey was locked onto yellow as Angel brought the finger to his lips, slowly taking it into his mouth and suckling the blood off.

A fire immediately ignited in Alandra, deep down in her belly. As Angel took another finger in his mouth, the bright yellow glowing of their hands began. Angel removed the fingers from his mouth then began to kiss the palm, wrist, and along her arm. Alandra felt her eyes close, scooting closer to him till her chest was pressed against him. She ran her other fingers along his skin, the coolness zinging her heated skin.

"We-we need to talk Angel," Alandra said, her voice hitching as he gently bit into the tender underside of her bicep.

"About what," Angel asked, his voice muffled from his lips constantly moving against her skin. Alandra opened her eyes and saw how bright the glowing had become, the yellow now moving from their arms to their hearts and spreading throughout their entire chests.

"The glowing," Alandra said, but Angel continued his attention to her scar covered arm. She saw the attention he paid to each one, his tongue laving the long closed wounds before gently kissing them. She realized that he was apologizing to her through the attention he was paying to her now.

"Angel, stop and listen to me please," she said. Angel stopped, his human façade meeting her eyes now. He still kept her hand clutched tightly to his, the knuckles and fingers pressed to his lips.

"We have a rare bond called _Amoris Vinculum_," she began, "It means love bond. We some how made one the night you went away. That's why there is glowing, and it's getting stronger."

"I don't want to talk about the glowing right now," Angel said, "We need to talk about something more important than that."

"What could possibly be more important than an _unbreakable _bond," Alandra asked, her voice full of sarcasm. She couldn't but nod at the shocked look Angel gave her.

"Yea, that's right. It's unbreakable. We have no clue what that means or what that's going to do to us. I already know Giles is going to look into it, but until he finds something, we're completely in the dark," Alandra said, her voice becoming slightly hysterical towards the end.

"I know you're worried about all of this right now Alandra," Angel said, trying to calm her down, but his words just made her angry.

"You don't get it Angel," she began, pulling away from him, "You were gone because of me. You were in hell because of me. I can't even look at Buffy without feeling guilty because I took you away from her. And now you're back, and we have this unbreakable bond and it's like I'm taking you away from her all over again. Not to mention that your soul is tied to mine, so I've literally tied you to me. We don't even know what that means for the both of us."

"Sit down Alandra," he told her, gesturing to her previous spot. When she just continued to stand he grabbed her hand and pulled her down beside him again. He looked into her eyes and saw and felt everything she was feeling. Fear, guilt, happiness, worry.

"I need you to listen to me for a moment," Angel said. He stayed silent until she nodded in confirmation that she would in fact listen to what he was about to say.

"You have nothing to feel guilty about because you are _not _to blame for any of this. No, let me finish," he said when she opened her mouth to contradict him.

"None of this is your fault. Giles will find out what this bond actually means, and we'll deal with Buffy when it comes to it. Together. I'm not going to let you down like I did last time," Angel told her, his voice filled with passion.

"When have you ever let me down," Alandra asked, confused by his last words.

"When I lost my soul. When I kidnapped you and tortured you. When I couldn't protect you from myself," Angel said, his own guilt on his face. Alandra was amazed that she could tell everything he had been feeling. Most of it was a giant swirl of emotions that belied his calm demeanor. Alandra wrapped him in her arms, holding him tightly.

"I don't blame you for any of that," she whispered against his cheek. Angel pulled away, looking as if he was going to speak, but she cut him off.

"Angelus is a part of you, and nothing can change that, not even your soul," she said, her hand resting against his cheek.

"But I also know that you are a good man and that you weren't yourself. I don't blame you for any of it," she told him. Angel placed his own hand over hers, nuzzling his cheek further into her palm. Alandra was touched by the sight, making other thoughts begin to rise to the surface.

"What are we doing Angel," she asked, her voice a soft whisper. Angel looked up at her, remaining quiet as he thought of an answer for her.

"I don't really know," he replied, "All I know is that you were who I thought about while I was in hell. You were who got me through the torment and pain. The thought of you and only you was the only thing that got me through."

"But Buffy," Alandra began, but Angel cut her off.

"Buffy and I were over before I lost my soul. I cared about her. I still care about her. But I don't love her," Angel told her.

_Not like how I love you_, were the unspoken words in the room. The air immediately changed and the want and need to kiss each other, the one they had been feeling since had arrived, intensified a thousand fold. Alandra was sure that the bond had at least a part in it, but at the moment all she could think about was what his lips would feel like against hers.

Her breath was hot against his face, their lips not even an inch away from each other. He had wondered for a long time what would it be like to kiss her, thoughts he always pushed away and replaced them with thoughts of Buffy. But now that he's admitted out loud that him and Buffy were over, he was free to do what ever he wanted.

Angel closed the distance, the touch of lips at first gentle and light, ready to pull away at a moment's notice. Electricity shot through Alandra's body, heating her from the inside out. Craving more, she pressed her lips against him more forcefully. Angel was at first surprised, but kissed her back just as hard, his lips starting to move sensually against hers. Alandra sighed at the sensation, allowing Angel to slip his tongue into her mouth, massaging it against hers.

Alandra moved to be closer to him, and soon found herself straddling his lap, her arms wrapped around his neck. Angel growled and grabbed her hips, occasionally stroking them up and down her sides. He basked in the soft sighs and gasps she made as his cool fingers slipped under her shirt and blazed a fire across her skin.

Alandra had her fingers in his hair, clenching onto the strands tightly. Heat spread from her belly out, the urge to rock against him becoming stronger with each moment. She moaned loudly when Angel ground himself against her, making him growl loudly against her mouth.

"I missed you," Alandra said between kisses, now running her hot hands down his chest, enjoying the feeling of his skin against hers.

"I missed you," he replied, his voice cracking with emotion and passion.

"I'm so sorry for what I did to you," Alandra told him, tears beginning to spring to her eyes. Passion turned into tenderness and Angel began to place light kisses all over face before giving her a tender kiss on her lips. It was long and filled with love and emotion and it touched Alandra's heart so deeply that she openly wept.

"You did nothing wrong Alandra," Angel told her, wiping the tears away from her cheeks with the pads of his thumb.

"I sent you to hell. How could I have not done something wrong," she replied, trying to pull away, but Angel kept her in place, making sure she was looking him in the eyes.

"You did what you had to do to save the world. Are you listening to me," he said, his tone full of command. When Alandra nodded he continued on.

"You did what you had to do. I want you to promise me that if it came down to it you won't pick me," he told her. She began to shake her head, but his hands kept her head in place.

"If it came down to the world or me, don't pick me. I'm not worth it," he said. Alandra took a deep breath before leaning in to give him another long kiss, but this time it hard and demanding and full of passion.

"I don't know if I could lose you again," she told him. Angel wanted to argue the point but knew that now wasn't the time. He knew the sun had gone down and soon Alandra will be deciding to head home.

"Stay with me tonight," he said in a whisper. Alandra looked at him, silent as she thought about what he was asking her. She debated it for a moment. They had already passed the point of no return, high off of his arrival. What would happen tomorrow or the next day. And could she really be able to spend a night in the place that had been a part of so much pain.

"I know that this place holds a lot of pain for you. So if you don't want to, you can leave," Angel told her, "But I would really like it if you stayed."

"Ok," she whispered. Angel smiled at her before placing a kiss on her forehead. Alandra moved to more sit rather than straddle his lap, Angel placing his chin on the top of her head and just holding her.

"What about Buffy," Alandra asked, the question that had been on her mind almost the entire night.

"I'll worry about Buffy. You just rest. We'll talk some more later," Angel told her, kissing her hair and rocking them back and forth. Exhausted from the day, Alandra closed her eyes and fell asleep.

~0~0~

The next morning Alandra found herself in a large bed dressed in red satin sheets and a red satin comforter. She turned over to see Angel laying beside her, reading a book. When he realized that she was awake he closed the book and looked down at her, a smile on his face.

"Morning little one," Angel said to her. Alandra couldn't help but feel a happy warmth spread through her at the new term of endearment.

"Morning," she replied, her voice still thick from sleep.

"Did you sleep well," he asked. Alandra nodded, bringing her hands to her face to clear the sleep from her eyes.

"Yep. Tonight's the first night I haven't had a nightmare in months," she told him, a sleepy smile gracing her face. It immediately fell when she saw a guilty look enter Angel's own features.

"Alandra," Angel began, but she quickly pushed up onto her elbows and cut him off with a kiss. Angel sighed against her lips, grasping onto her shoulders with his large hands to pull her closer to him. Once she was satisfied enough with his response she pulled away to look into his eyes.

"You're not about to change the topic," he told her. Alandra couldn't help but smile at his words. She brought her hand up slowly and ran her fingers softly down his cheek and across his brow, smoothing out the furrowed lines that had begun to form.

"You seemed like you needed a distraction," she replied. Angel sighed before clutching the hand gently stroking his skin with his own, bringing it to his lips and kissing it's palm.

"Answer me honestly. Will your apologizing and feeling guilty change anything," Alandra asked. Angel remained silent, keeping the palm of her hand against his lips, watching her with his deep brown eyes, thinking heavily on his answer.

"No," he replied, "But I wish it did."

"But it's not, so stop it," she told him, her tone filling with force. Angel could see the storm swirling in her eyes, some of the passion that she had lost already returning.

"Only if you do the same," he said, smirking at her huff of annoyance. She pushed her hair away from her face, wincing in pain as a finger caught in a knot.

"I wish I had realized we were going to have a sleepover," she said, "Or I would've brought my comb, bunny onesie and Disney films for us to marathon."

"I don't watch Disney films," Angel replied, lowering their still clasped hands down to his lap. Alandra laughed loudly at his words.

"You're such an old man. Maybe I should get you a walker for your birthday," she joked.

"That and a special cup for my dentures," he told her, making her laugh even more.

"We should have a Disney film marathon one day," she suggested, smiling brightly at his grimace, "Come on! You just might enjoy them. How are you supposed to know if you like them if you don't try."

"I am not watching anything from Disney," he said, his tone flat and brooking no more argument. Alandra moved until she was sitting on his lap, her hands splayed across his chest, a pout on her lips. Angel lifted a single brow, a small smile on his face as he waited for Alandra's next move.

"Make that pouty face all you want," Angel told her, "I'm not going to have a Disney marathon."

"Please," she begged, the pout becoming more pronounced, her eyes becoming wide and sad. Angel remained silent, simply watching her again. He couldn't believe that despite everything that he has done he has such an amazing friend and such an amazing person to love. Happiness filled him, causing his arm to glow. Alandra and he both looked down and saw how bright the glowing had become.

"It only glows when I feel happy," Angel told her, looking from his glowing arm to her eyes.

"Same for me," she replied and suddenly her arm began to glow as well. She felt happiness flooding her at the thought that she gave him happiness.

"What are we doing Angel," she asked him. Angel moved to sit up more before wrapping his arms around her waist.

"I don't know. All I know is that it feels right," he told her. Alandra sighed, pressing the bridge of her nose as thoughts and faces began to swirl in her brain.

"Buffy is going to have a fit when she finds out you're alive," she said, her body slouching at the thought. She could just imagine the fight that was going to break out. There was definitely going to be some black eyes and a few broken ribs.

"I'll deal with Buffy. I'm going to explain everything to her and she's just going to have to deal with it," Angel told her, making Alandra's eyes look up into his. Her heart began to race at his words, hoping that by everything he means what he has with her.

"Everything," she asked, her voice full of hope. Angel smiled brightly at her, the widest she had seen in a long time. She never realized how much of an empty ache he had left until she finally got him back.

"Everything," he replied. Alandra gave him her own bright smile before leaning down and placing a soft kiss on his lips. Both their bodies had begun to glow once again, the yellow spreading as if moving through their veins. Their emotions and senses became amplified and Alandra suddenly wanted more, deepening the kiss instantly. Angel knew he didn't deserve someone like her, but he had her, and he was never letting her go.


	15. Chapter 15

Angel was slowly recovering, the constant supply of human blood Alandra helping him immensely. As the days moved on and they spent more time together Alandra could feel his soul connected to hers. It gave her a warm feeling carrying a part of him with her and it was the only thing that brought out her true smiles. The Scoobies had noticed that she had become happier over the past month, the dark cloud she had been carrying around with her becoming lighter and lighter with each passing day, but only Giles knew the real reason, and Buffy was becoming suspicious.

"Have you noticed anything off about Alandra lately," she asked Xander and Willow as she sat in down with them at one of the tables in the library. The trio were unaware of the English Librarian listening in on their conversation from his office.

"You mean the way she seems to be happier," Xander questioned, his voice full of sarcasm, "Yea, she's been way off lately."

"She's hiding something," Buffy told them, ignoring Xander's jab.

"Who's hiding what," another woman's voice said from the library entrance. The trio turned to see the other slayer Faith stepping inside, a swagger in her step. When Buffy drowned at the hands of the Master, another Slayer was called. Her name was Kendra. Drusilla killed her the night before Angelus tried to raise Acathala, kidnapping Giles in the process. Then Faith was called to become the slayer. Her watcher was brutally murdered in front of her, leading her to be drawn to Sunnydale to continue on her mission. She was brash and tactless, fighting before thinking, always jumping head first into the fight. Buffy, Xander and Willow and the other were wary of the other Slayer, but she had become instant friends with Alandra.

"Buffy thinks something's off with Alandra," Xander told her, making the other girl snort in derision.

"She's finally getting a spring back into her step and you think something's off with her? What's you beef with her anyway? Can't be in the same room with you two without needing to cut the tension with a battle axe," Faith said, jumping onto the counter and crossing her feet underneath her. Buffy remained silent, leaving Willow to answer for her.

"She was best friend's with Buffy's true love, Angel," Willow said, her voice soft, "Alandra had to send him to a hell dimension after he regained his soul when his demon alter ego Angelus tried to send the entire world into it." Buffy stood quickly from her seat and after giving an unbelievable excuse about having to go study, stomped out of the library, leaving everyone else to watch her walk out.

"Still a touchy subject I see," Faith said in a low voice, Buffy catching her words just as she stepped through the doors. The blonde slayer paused for a moment but continued on without further hesitation.

"That's really rough. Al's got some guts, I can tell you that," Faith said before jumping down and taking a step to the other two.

"Yea, I'm really happy for her," Willow told them, "Whatever is making her cheer up has to be a good thing. After everything she's been through, she deserves it." Giles took that moment to step out of his office, a tired look on his face.

"Hey G-Man," Xander called cheerfully, smiles instantly appearing on all of their faces. He looked at the bright and glimmering eyes of the children he had become in charge of. They were so young. They could ignore everything they saw and just go on with their lives like everyone else, but they didn't. They fought evil to make the world a better place and he was thankful to the fates that they gave them to him. They helped brighten his world when usually all he could see was darkness.

"Please don't call me that Xander," he asked, but he knew the teenager would ignore the request, and to be honest, Giles was rather fond of the nickname.

"I must tell you all something, but Buffy must not find out, at least not yet," Giles told them, his voice full of the serious tone they recognized as something big and possibly dangerous was happening. They all waited patiently for Giles to tell them his secret, and he hoped Alandra would forgive him, but he needed help with research. He couldn't do it on his own anymore.

"Angel has returned," he told them slowly. He waited as the various degrees of shock and confusion went across their faces.

"How is that possible," Xander spat, confusion becoming anger.

"I'm not sure. But he and Alandra accidentally created a very powerful bond and I need help researching on how this bond might affect the both of them. It's very old and none of the books I have currently hold any information," Giles explained.

"Why don't you want Buffy knowing about this," Faith asked, still not sure on the dynamics the group had. She trusted Giles. He always seemed to know best, especially when it came to Buffy and how to handle her. She just wanted to know the why.

"I don't believe Buffy is ready to handle the news yet. She is still mourning Angel's loss and is still angry with Alandra for what happened. I fear what she might do if she found out that he was back," Giles told her. Faith nodded in understanding.

"And what she might do if she found out that he was bonded to Alandra," Faith supplied. Giles nodded, but a sigh escaped his lips. He felt guilty about what he was doing, especially after everything Alandra and Buffy had been through, but it was the only way he knew how to find the answers he needed.

"So we're going into full secret research mode," Willow said, a look of determination on her face.

"Are we going to try to break the bond," Xander asked, anger still clearly on his face. Giles looked up at him and understood where he was coming from. Alandra deserved to be free from Angel, especially after everything he had done. He wanted to giver her as many options as possible.

"If we find a way to break the bond," Giles began, "Then we will present the information to Alandra and Angel and it will be up to them to decide."

"What's there to decide? Why would she want to be latched onto a blood-sucking vampire that loses his soul whenever he gets a happy who tortured her," Xander told them, "I would think the answer was pretty clear."

"She loves him," Willow said, her voice quiet. She placed a calming hand on Xander arm, trying to sooth his anger.

"That's why she's been so happy. Because he's back and she loves him. We should let her decide for herself. She's deserves that much," Willow told him, her voice still soft but full of passion. Xander seemed moved by her words and simply nodded in affirmation, a dark glint of anger still in his eye. Giles knew that Xander would stew on his feelings but remained silent and moved on to the next course of action.

"What do you need me to do," Faith asked him. Giles smiled at her, glad she changed the subject.

"You've been with Alandra the most lately. Just watch her for a bit and see if anything happens that shouldn't be. Such as increased strength and so on," Giles told her.

"Is the bond supposed to do that," Willow asked, a small notebook now out on the table for her to take notes.

"I'm not sure. But it stands to reason that creating a powerful bond with a vampire will allow her to gain some of his powers. I'm more curious as to what will happen to Angel," Giles said, going into a long explanation of possibilities of what the bond would do to Angel. Willow began to jot down notes for her computer research. Faith rolled her eyes and walked to the weapons cabinet and began to clean some of the axes and sharpening some the stakes. Xander simply sat in his seat, a dark look on his face as he began to think over the consequences of Angel's return.

None of them knew that Buffy was standing outside of the library doors, listening intently to their conversation. Fury bloomed in her heart and she immediately made her way to the Mansion on Crawford Street.

~0~0~

"I'm back," Alandra called out into the mansion. She looked around and saw Angel practicing tai chi in the living room. She remained quiet as she stepped towards him, watching his slow and calculated movements, his muscles bunching under skin, a light glistening of sweat beginning to coat his shirtless body. She sat down on the couch, waiting until he finished his set. Angel performed a slow, controlled punch before suddenly groaning and bending in half in pain. Alandra shot to her feet, immediately at his side to help him to the couch.

"You need to take it easy," Alandra told him. Angel took refuge in her arms, enjoying the feel of her hands on his sweat slickened skin.

"I need to get strong again in case something happens and you need protection," Angel replied, releasing a disappointed sigh. Alandra sat down beside him, wrapping her arms around one of his, holding it close to her chest and placing light kisses on his knuckles. She hated seeing him feel as if he was weak when he was anything but.

"You do remember that I was fighting vampires alone not too long ago? I can take care of myself," Alandra told him, a small smile on her face, leaning her head down to rest her chin on his shoulder.

"I know. You just shouldn't have to," Angel replied. Alandra moved to place a soft kiss on his cheek. Angel smiled down at her before leaning down and kissing her on the lips. The kiss was gentle and was meant to help heal, making warmth and the glowing of their bond spread through out their bodies.

"So it's true," a quiet girl's voice said from the door way. Alandra and Angel immediately jumped up, ready to fight. Once they both realized it was Buffy they relaxed, making Angel bend over in pain once again.

"Why are you here Buffy," Alandra asked her, her voice cold as she tried to get Angel to sit down once again, but he refused.

"I came to see if it's true that Angel was back," Buffy replied, "And if you two really were together. Or bonded or whatever."

"Yes, it's true," Angel answered, "I am bonded to Alandra. What that means exactly, we're not sure yet. But Giles is looking into it now."

"We need to talk," Buffy said, stepping closer to them. Alandra placed a hand in the air, halting her movements. Buffy glared at her hand before glaring up at her, her chest heaving with the itch to fight.

"Angel needs some rest. When he is feeling better, we can talk," Alandra told her, her voice firm.

"We as in me and Angel. You won't be a part of the conversation," Buffy spat out. Alandra's body immediately tensed, fury rushing to the surface. She barely registered the wide eyes of both Buffy and Angel.

"He is my bonded Slayer," Alandra said in a hiss, "Whatever you must say to him, you will say to me as well."

"Alandra," Angel voice carried over to her ears. She calmed down enough to look at him, wondering why he was looking at her with such shock. She then realized that she had moved away from him and closer to Buffy without even noticing.

"Your eyes," he said, moving towards her. He placed his left hand in her left hand, completing the connection of their bond.

"What's wrong with my eyes," she asked, worry and a small hint of fear beginning to seep in, dissipating her anger.

"They turned yellow," Buffy told her, "Like a vampire." Buffy herself was too shocked to remain angry at the moment.

"We need to call Giles," Alandra told them, walking over to the phone, "Now."

~0~0~

"What's happened," Giles asked as he walked into the mansion. He looked taken aback when he saw Buffy sitting in a chair off to the side, her arms across her chest.

"Buffy," he exclaimed, "What are you doing here?" He looked wildly at her before looking at the couple across from him.

"I came to find out if what I heard was true. If Angel was really back and if he was bonded to Alandra," Buffy told her Watcher, glowering at him.

"And how did you come by this information," Giles asked, removing his glasses to clean them before replacing them.

"I had left my notebook in the library. I had come back to get it and I overheard you telling Willow, Xander, and Faith about it," Buffy explained. Giles nodded, walking to one of the side tables and placing his book bag and jacket on top of it.

"We can talk about that later," Alandra cut in, annoyed at the topic of discussion, "We need to talk about what happened earlier."

"What happened earlier," Giles asked again, "And don't leave any detail out."

"Buffy came in, said she wanted to speak to Angel and only Angel. I felt as if I just had a flood of fury go through my body. It was beyond anger though. It was like every instinct in my body was telling me to fight her. And then Angel got my attention. I looked around and realized I had moved closer to her. Then they told me that my eyes had turned yellow like a vampire's," Alandra explained.

"She also immediately calmed down when we connected the hands that initially formed the bond," Angel added. Alandra nodded, unconsciously moving closer to him. Buffy caught the movement however and stared at them for a long moment. She could feel something powerful emanate off of them.

"They also did a glowing yellow thing," Buffy told Giles next. He remained silent as he thought about what they described. He began to pace taking longer than any of them expected for him to speak. Buffy soon released an annoyed huff, prompting Giles to speak his thoughts.

"It seems that in the process of your souls' being bound together, you are taking on some of his characteristics. And not Angel's characteristics, but the demon's. I'm not sure what this means in the long run or if it will become worse," Giles told them. Alandra had an idea that's what had happened, but Giles confirming it settled her mind a bit.

"Could Angel still being weak play a factor as well," Alandra asked, the next thought on her mind.

"Perhaps. It could also be your constant proximity with each other. Has the glowing been getting stronger," Giles asked. Angel and Alandra nodded simultaneously, making Buffy roll her eyes at them.

"Yea, it's been getting brighter and spreading further through out our body. It looks like it's going through our arteries and veins," Angel told him. Always a scholar at heart, the new information made Giles's eyes glow with curiosity.

"Very interesting. Willow and Xander have started helping me with research. I also have some contacts in Ethiopia that might have some records on this particular bond. For some reason, even though it's incredibly rare, most of the cases have been found there," Giles told them. Angel and Alandra once again nodded at the same time, making Buffy make a gagging sound.

"What's on your mind Buffy," Giles asked, his tone full of exasperation.

"They're nodding at the same time," Buffy cried, "It's so couple-y and gross."

"Not as gross as having to watch you shove your tongue down his throat," Alandra countered. Giles and Angel made a choking sound.

"I don't remember hearing him complain at the time," Buffy shot back. Alandra smirked at her, turning so that she was facing the blonde more.

"How could he when you were acting like you were sucking his voice box from his throat. It's a good thing he's a vampire, otherwise he would have been dead from lack of oxygen," Alandra told her, sarcasm hiding her anger at the memory.

"Can you not talk about this now," Angel interjected, "Especially in front of Giles. Or me for that matter."

"I concur," Giles said, clearing his throat. The girls ignored them however. They stood with their backs tall, their shoulders squared. Although the two men were thankful it wasn't a physical fight, they would rather there be no fight at all.

"Can you even get two feet away from him? Or is he permanently attached to your hip? At least getting married you can get a divorce," Buffy said over the men, ignoring their pleas. Alandra released a huff of breath through her nose, reminding Angel of an angry bull.

"But that's the great thing about us," Alandra told her, "He wouldn't want to get a divorce."

"I don't know, you do have a pretty big ass. He has a tendency to like smaller bodies and blondes," Buffy retorted. Giles and Angel both coughed again, this time much louder than before.

"He seems to be handling my ass just fine. And black haired females seem to be his favorite," Alandra told her. She wanted to laugh at the men's reactions but kept her face expressionless.

"And really, the best come back you could come up with was the size of my ass. Very immature of you Buffy. I expected better," Alandra said.

"I find this entire conversation immature," Giles mumbled under his breath.

"Is this the woman's version of a pissing contest," Angel asked Alandra, hoping to change the topic, but he was once again ignored.

"Do you love him," Buffy asked, the air changing suddenly. Angel and Giles were surprised at the quick turn in topic. Buffy and Alandra just looked into each other's eyes. Alandra could hear the challenge in the blonde's tone. Buffy was waiting for her to tell her no. To tell her that it was just all a mistake and her and Angel could go back to the way things were.

"With all my heart and soul," Alandra replied, her voice low. They could all hear the power in the evocation, and suddenly Angel's and Alandra's body's began to glow once again, the brightest it had been so far. Giles was amazed at the sight, removing his glasses as if it would help him see better.

"The bond can only be formed out of love," Giles softly informed them, "If they didn't truly love each other, the bond would never have been created." Angel and Alandra looked at each other, the power of the bond flooding the room. After another beat, Alandra looked back at Buffy.

"Ok then," Buffy replied, her voice attempting to sound cheerful but falling short. But Alandra knew that they had reached an understanding and simply nodded. The glowing slowly began to disperse through out their bodies. Giles was still in mild shock, the sight he had seen overtaking his thoughts in his mind.

"I'm going to do more research. I'll let you know as soon as I can if any new info comes to light," Giles told them after clearing his throat. He quickly gathered his things and ran out of the mansion, eager to get back to his books.

"I'll be heading out as well," Buffy said, standing up slowly and heading towards the door.

"Buffy, wait," Angel called to her. She paused, a look of desperation on her face to get out of there as fast as possible. Angel was able to quickly make it over to her, despite the weakness of his body that he still had.

"Please believe me when I say," Angel began, but Buffy cut him off with a wave of her hand.

"Angel, you don't have to explain," Buffy told him. She smiled sadly up at him before continuing on, "And deep down, in a way, I think I always knew it was her." Angel remained silent, unable to think of any words to say and simply left it at that.

"Night Alandra," Buffy nodded to the girl who was still sitting on the couch, "Night Angel." Buffy waved a small goodbye before disappearing into the night.

"I think that went much better than I originally expected," Alandra sighed out, stretching her body to release her exhaustion.

"I was thinking so as well," Angel replied as he slowly walked back over to her and placed himself next to her on the couch once again, "And then you started talking about my dating habits with Buffy."

"I thought it was entertaining," Alandra said through an amused smirk.

"You're going to get some pay back for that. I hope you realize that," Angel said. He looked sideways at her, and Alandra could see his struggle with trying to maintain his expressionless face. She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before standing and heading towards the kitchen.

"I'm looking forward to it," she said over her shoulder, her voice taking on a husky tone. This time Angel did smirk, but simply crossed his arms over his chest and remained silent as she walked out.

**A/N: Sorry for the length it took me to post this. Life has been pretty crazy with work and stuff. Hope you enjoyed this chapter and I would like to inform you that there will be a sequel and it's coming together very nicely. Thanks friends and don't forget to review!**


	16. Chapter 16

Spike was hurt and angry. And some how those feelings led him back to the place that had started it all. Drusilla had left him. For a chaos demon none the less, and he had been in a drunken fog for days. Now he was in a store that catered to the witch population of Sunnyhell looking for a snack.

He stood in the shadows of the store behind a shelf full of different ingredients, chicken feet, eye of frog, spleen of snake, and so on. He knew how to blend in, to become part of the shadows, to watch his prey, he had learned how to do it from the best, Angelus. He hated it though. Despite it being the best way to survive, he wanted to be impulsive. He could do it in a town like this, no one would bat an eye, except for the slayer. But he decided to go the smart route and watch and wait.

"Do you have these ingredients for a love spell," a cheerful voice asked, immediately catching Spike's attention. He recognized the voice and turned to find the red-headed girl from the Slayer's friendship circle.

"Well, it's actually more of a de-lusting spell," Willow clarified, her smile bright as the store clerk told her which ingredients she should get. Once the purchases had been made Willow left the store, leaving the woman to clear up any thing that had been made out of place. He could hear the small pulse of her heart beat, could see the vein beat against her neck. A small smirk lifted his lips as the ridges formed along his brow, his eyes shining a bright amber yellow, and his fangs gleaming dully against the low light.

He wrapped his arm around her, her pulse quickly rising as he sunk his teeth into her skin. Blood flowed quickly into his mouth, incensing him to drink more. He could feel the blood heat him from the inside out, making him feel alive. He lifted his head to look at where Willow had left, blood running down the sides of his mouth.

"A love spell," Spike said, a smile on his face. He now knew exactly what to do to get his Dru back.

~0~0~

"Willow and Xander are missing," Cordelia said as she and OZ crashed into the Library. Alandra had been putting books and weapons away for Giles when he returned from his camping trip.

"What do you mean they're missing," Alandra asked them, panic immediately hitting her heart.

"We went to one of the science rooms where Willow told us to meet them and they weren't there," Cordelia explained.

"Some things were broken," Oz cut in, "Looked like there had been a fight."

"Giles is out of town on some sort of retreat. Go find Buffy and then try to find a way to contact him," Alandra ordered. Cordelia and Oz nodded and began to head towards the doors when Buffy came crashing in, a happy smile on her face.

"Hey guys. Why the scared faces," Buffy asked, bounce in her step.

"Willow and Xander are gone," Alandra told her, immediately halting Buffy in her steps.

"What do you mean gone," Buffy asked, her own panic coming onto her face.

"Show her where you guys were supposed to meet them. I'm going to go get Angel and we'll start searching," Alandra said before heading out of the library. The moment she was in the school parking lot Angel appeared beside her, stepping from the shadows.

"What's wrong. I could sense you needed me," Angel asked, worry on his face.

"Willow and Xander are missing. We need to start looking for them," Alandra told him, starting to walk away from the parking lot but Angel placed a hand on her arm, halting her in her footsteps.

"Stop for a moment Alandra," he told her, his voice soothing, but it sent her more into a panic.

"I can't stop for a moment. Willow and Xander are out there missing. We need to find them now before something happens to them," she replied. Flashes of her time as hostage under Angelus's roof flashed behind Alandra's eyes. She did not want that happening to Willow or Xander. She would never be able to forgive herself if that happened to them. Knowing exactly what she was thinking, Angel wrapped his arms around her, holding her body tightly to his. Alandra took comfort in his arms, her eyes falling shut and allowing her body to take a deep breath.

"We'll find them," he told her, his voice barely above a whisper as he spoke, "We'll find them."

"Oh good, you're still here," Buffy said, coming out from the school beside them.

"What's up," Alandra asked as she pulled away. She still felt awkward around the blonde, but the atmosphere was incredibly lighter since their talk a couple of weeks ago.

"It's Spike. He's at my place. He's the one that took Willow and Xander," Buffy said, walking quickly towards her home. Angel growled in anger and followed behind her. Alandra ran after them, worry for another friend filling her.

"I'm sure if we talk to him he'll let them go," Alandra said to them, trying to keep up with their frantic pace.

"You don't know Spike Alandra. He's a ruthless killer that will do anything to get what he wants," Angel told her, barely glancing back at her. He was consumed with anger and hate and Alandra didn't know why. Spike had been a friend when she needed one most and wanted to protect him too.

"And now he's with my mother," Buffy said, her voice dark. Alandra knew that if anything happened to Joyce Summers the Slayer would be out for blood.

~0~0~

"And then she said, 'Maybe we would be better off as friends.' And I said, 'Fine, I don't have to take anymore of this.' And then she left me! For a Chaos demon," Spike exclaimed as he sat at the kitchen table with Joyce. His face showed the heartbreak he felt at the loss of Drusilla.

"Sometimes people grow out of each other," Joyce offered, trying to soothe the vampire.

"No! You don't understand! Our love was true and eternal," Spike cried out. Joyce nodded and decided to change the subject.

"Would you like something to drink," she asked, her voice gentle. Spike looked up, a smile on his face.

"Do you have any hot chocolate with those teeny marshmallows," he asked, his face turning into a look of innocence. Joyce nodded and made her way to the cabinets in search of his request.

There was a loud crash at the kitchen door. They look to find Angel, standing and growling at the younger vamp.

"Joyce, invite me in," Angel said, but Joyce shook her head in refusal.

"There is no way I'm inviting you in you monster," she hissed, putting her body in front of Spike as if to protect him.

"That's right," Spike said, his voice taunting, "Go away you very bad man." Joyce jumped as Spike was grabbed from behind and slammed onto the kitchen counter by Buffy.

"Come in Angel," she said, her voice amused. She ignored her mother's cries as Angel stepped inside.

"Where are they Spike," Buffy asked, her hand tight around his throat, "What did you do to them."

"I needed the red head to perform a love spell for me to get me Dru back. The other one was to convince her to do it, and maybe for a snack later," Spike explained, he groaned lightly as Buffy pressed the stake further into him, but a smile was still on his face, "Let her finish the spell and I'll release them."

"If anything happened to them, I'll stake you," Buffy warned. Spike licked his teeth, trying to taunt her as she let him up. Angel pushed him out of the door to the sight of Alandra.

"Hello there cutie," Spike said to her, his voice immediately filling with fondness. Alandra smiled brightly at him before wrapping him in a tight hug.

"What trouble have you gotten yourself into this time Spike," she asked, already knowing the answer as she pulled away from him.

"Trouble? This is a typical Thursday for me luv," Spike replied. Angel pushed him once again, making the other vampire fall to the ground. Spike glared up at the older vamp before jumping back up and cleaning off his clothes from the dirt. Angel stood beside her, his body slightly blocking Alandra from Spike's view.

"I don't like you talking to him," Angel said to Alandra, filling her with anger.

"And I don't like you telling me what to do," she shot back. Her words prompted him to growl in warning. Spike was surprised when he heard Alandra growl back.

"What the bloody hell is going on between you two," Spike asked, "And when did you start growling like that Alandra?"

"You got a problem with it Spike," Angel asked, his eyes flashing yellow.

"Nah. I think it's kind of hot to be honest," Spike replied in response to Alandra's growling, an enamored look entering his face as he looked at her. He fell to the ground again as Angel punched him in the face. Spike held his jaw in one hand, sudden realization lighting up his face.

"Don't tell me you two are together," Spike asked. Alandra sighed as she knelt down to help him up. Spike scoffed loudly in disapproval but accepted the help all of the same.

"You _are_ with him," he nearly shrieked, "You could do so much better than this poofter Alandra."

"It's a long story. Please let it go for now," Alandra begged. She sighed in relief as Buffy stepped out of the house and walked to where the tripod stood.

"Let's get these supplies and then you tell us where Willow and Xander are," Buffy said to Spike, her eyes cold as she walked up to him and wrapped her hand around his throat again.

"No games Spike," Buffy said, making the blonde vampire smile mischievously.

"That's all life is luv," he replied, "A game."

~0~0~

"And then she said, "Maybe we would be better off as friends.' And I said, 'Fine, I don't have take this anymore!' She left me for a Chaos demon! Have you ever seen one of those," Spike asked Alandra at the end of his tale of woe. Alandra couldn't help but feel amused by his antics. She shook her head, prompting him to go into a very in depth description of them. She heard Angel huff from the side, making her even more amused.

"That's enough Spike," Angel said, speeding up so that he was standing beside them, leaving Alandra between them. Spike scoffed at him the placed an arm sloppily around Alandra's shoulders.

"We have to hear you whine all the time," Spike shot back, "Can't a bloke complain to his mate for a minute? Jeez!"

"She isn't one of your 'mates'," Angel replied, his voice and face darkening with each word. Alandra was surprised by the wet kiss Spike gave her on the cheek.

"You're one of my mates, aren't you Alandra? Thick as thieves we are, aren't we," Spike asked her. She was actually quite surprised by the question. She knew that on some level she considered Spike a friend, but hadn't realized he even placed her in the same zone let alone in the same category as friendship.

"Yea Spike, I'm your mate," she said to him, her voice soft and full of slight awe. His words touched her heart more than she should probably ever admit to anyone.

"May I speak to you for a moment Alandra," Angel asked, his voice cold. She knew he was angry, could feel it burn through her through their bond.

"If the poofter gives you any trouble, let me know," Spike said, loud enough for everyone to hear, "I'll take him down for you."

"Don't worry, I can take him," Alandra replied, making Spike smile widely at her. She removed herself from his side, moving closer to where Angel and Buffy were standing together. One face looked baffled and amazed, while the other was full of anger.

"What the hell do you think you're doing," Angel hissed at her. She was going to try to be the bigger person and remain calm, but his anger coursing through her made her own anger surge.

"I'm comforting a friend who is in pain. You got a problem with that," she asked him, placing her hand on her hips. She would be unmoved now.

"He is not your friend," Angel replied, "He is a soulless vampire that would not hesitate to kill you for fun and just to piss me off."

"If Spike really wanted to kill me he would have done it already. You and I both know that," Alandra told him, then sighed as she tried to get her thoughts in order. She looked down at the ground, raising one hand to pinch the bridge of her nose trying to stop the headache that was beginning to form. When she looked back up at Angel, all she could see was worry and a small hint of fear in his eyes.

"Spike is the one that kept me sane Angel," she admitted. She felt guilty as she watched Angel's face crumble into his own sadness and guilt.

"He was the one that pushed me to not give up while I was trapped in the mansion. He comforted me, fed me, cleaned me. If it weren't for him, who knows what sort of mess I would be today. He has done some horrible things, but he is my friend. You don't have to like it, but you have to respect it," Alandra told him. Angel nodded, and all Alandra wanted to do was wrap her arms around him and kiss him to soothe his guilt that she knew he was feeling, but she knew that Spike was watching, and hesitated.

"Fine. But I will not hesitate to stake him if he does anything that is remotely out of line," Angel told her. She nodded in acquiescence but wondered what was out of line in his eyes.

"As touching as this is, can we get a move on," Buffy asked, breaking them out of their spell, "I would like to find Willow and Xander as soon as possible."

"Of course. Sorry Buffy," Alandra said before moving back to where Spike was waiting. He was crying over a bench where he and Drusilla ate a homeless man. Angel made no hesitation in pushing him forward to make the younger vamp move again.

"Oi, watch the leather," Spike cried, "It's vintage."

"The only thing you should be worried about is your face if you don't shut your mouth," Angel shot back, glowering at him.

"Alandra," Spike whined, "Make the poof be nice to me!" All three of them rolled their eyes at the him, but Alandra was the only one to do anything. She grabbed the bottle of vodka that was still in his hand and tossed it into the street, making it shatter into pieces.

"Hey," Spike cried, "Why did you do that! That was some good shit!"

"I'm cutting you off. Where's the list of ingredients she needs to do the spell," Alandra asked, her voice full of command. She waited patiently as Spike scoffed at her before putting a hand in his pocket and pulling out a small piece of paper.

"Ok, lets go and make this quick," Buffy said before snatching the paper out of his hand. The group made their way into the Magic Shop and quickly searched through it for the ingredients on the list. It was silent, and the air was full of tension.

"Ok, what the bloody hell is going on between you three," Spike asked loudly, unable to take the silence any more.

"Shut up Spike," Angel and Buffy said at the same time, making Alandra whirl around to look at them. Spike noticed the look she gave and suddenly everything clicked for him.

"This has to do with that bond thing don't it," he asked, smiling when Angel turned to glare at him.

"Let me guess. Some how Alandra and Angel got bonded, whatever that fucking means, and now you all don't know how to handle the love triangle that's happening because Buffy still loves Angel," Spike said, nearly giggling in excitement at the sad look Buffy gave him.

"I do not still love Angel," Buffy said, but it sounded unconvincing even to her own ears.

"Sure. Keep telling yourself that luv. I may be love's bitch, but at least I can admit it," Spike told her before turning around and tossing things off the shelf to find one of the last ingredients they still needed. Once he found what he was looking for he made a triumphant noise.

"Is that everything," Alandra asked, sadness over coming her. Spike looked at her and saw that Angel was giving her the same concerned look he was. He scoffed at himself for caring about her, wondering if Dru was right. Had he really gone soft? But there was something about Alandra that called to him.

"Let's get out of here," Buffy said, also seeing the guilt that had over come Alandra's face. After everything Alandra had been through, she shouldn't have to feel guilty. Buffy didn't blame her for any of it, not really.

They had barely taken a step out of the shop when they became surrounded by a gang of vampires.

"You still owe us some money Spike," a large vampire said, "We told you to never come back."

"Right," Spike said, his face transforming into one of a vampire, "About that."

"Get them," the lead vampire yelled, and the gang of vampires attacked. Alandra immediately went into the fight, putting her entire body into it. She hadn't thought to bring a stake or holy water and was fighting to keep the vampires back as came after her, one after the other.

"There's too many of them," she heard Buffy call out.

"Get inside," Angel yelled to them. Alandra had pushed back another vampire and had turned around to head back inside she was knocked in the head by a vampire from the side of her. Her head snapped back, and stars began to swim over her eyes. She felt heavy as she fell to the ground, pain shooting from her head down her spine. Spike pounced on the vampire, knocking him to the ground, his fist making it's mark on the vampire's face.

"That wasn't very nice," Spike said, emphasizing each word with a punch before ripping the vampire's head off. The was a quiet screech as the vampire fell to dust beneath him.

"Get her inside Spike," Angel shouted out to him, still trying to beat back his own vampires enough to try to make it to her. Spike swooped Alandra up into his arms, her head lolling onto his shoulder. Her eyes slowly fluttered open, grey meeting blue.

"Always here to save the day," Alandra said, her voice soft.

"Don't get used to it darling," Spike said gruffly, "I'm still evil."

"Have you hurt Willow or Xander," Alandra asked, her voice still quiet as he began to set her on her feet inside the store. Her hands were tightly latched onto his shoulders, her mind still cloudy from the hit she took.

"The boy is a little banged up," Spike admitted, "Scared the red-head a bit, but no harm has come to them."

"Good," Alandra replied, nodding slowly as she thought about where they could be. She honestly figured that Oz and Cordelia would have found them by now with the help of Giles. Spike still kept his arm around her, steadying her. He looked down into her eyes, warmth spreading over him. She helped him feel alive, like fresh blood that courses through his veins, but stronger. Alandra looked back up at him, her head tilting to the side in confusion, a small smile on her face. She didn't understand the look he was giving her. It was full of admiration and awe. Her brain ached from the punch she took, but seeing the way his eyes seemed to glow from the inside out almost made it feel like the pain was beginning to ease from it.

"Alandra," Angel said in a relieved sigh, running to her, pulling her out of Spike's arms and wrapping her in his own tightly. She could feel his fear and relief and smiled softly at him as he gently checked over her head with his hands. She glanced back at Spike, a scowl entering his features as he turned away from them.

"I'm glad you're all right," he told her just under his breath. Alandra couldn't bring herself to speak so she just nodded, holding onto him, her hands clutching to his chest.

"Help me block these doors," Buffy called out, and the three set to work. Putting whatever tables, chairs, or shelves they could in front of every open surface the vampire gang could come through.

"I'm always left to clean up your mess," Angel said to Spike as they pushed a shelf to a window together.

"I've been on my own for over a hundred years," Spike spat at him in anger, "I know how to clean up my own messes."

"Really? Because you certainly seem to be doing a bang up job tonight," Angel replied, his voice full of sarcasm.

"Listen here you poof," Spike began, turning towards Angel. Angel turned towards him, waiting for him to finish his sentence, but it never came. Alandra stepped in between them, trying to make eye contact, but they glared at each other over her.

"We do not have time for this," she hissed at them, "Both of you stop acting like you're five." Spike and Angel opened their mouths to argue but once again were cut off. This time it was the sounds of wood splitting as the vampire gang broke through one the shelf blocking one of the windows. Soon the vampires were pouring in, attacking them at full force once again. Angel and Buffy were standing closest to a table covered in bottles of holy water, and quickly took advantage and threw them at the vampires. Screams of pain were heard through out the store, making Spike laugh with glee.

Alandra grabbed a thick piece of wood that had broken off, making her way through the vampires in fast pace. One after the other they fell. She was on autopilot as she glided through the ranks, and smiled when she saw Spike fighting beside her, moving with quick ferocity.

Alandra never felt happy when she slayed vampires. It didn't giver her excitement or an adrenaline rush like when you ride a fast roller coaster. It helped her feel free, and that's what made her happy. She enjoyed the feeling of her muscles working and moving beneath her skin as she watched the vampires turn to dust and blow away behind her. The fight soothed her in a way that nothing else really could.

It wasn't long before most of the vampire gang had either been dusted or ran off, leaving the group of four in the middle of the decimated magic shop. Her muscles began to feel the tiredness of fighting so long, and she knew she would be sore tomorrow, but it was going to be a good kind of sore. The type of sore speaking of a job well done.

"Well, I'm off," Spike said suddenly, moving around the debris and heading towards the front doors. Buffy and Angel looked at him, flabbergasted.

"What do you mean, 'You're off'? What about the spell? What about Willow and Xander," Buffy asked, her voice become higher and higher with each sentence.

"They're at the old burned down factory," Alandra said, exhaustion seeping into her bones. She still felt woozy from her hit to her head and the fight, her heart finally slowing down.

"If you knew that, why didn't you say something earlier," Buffy asked her. Alandra could hear the accusation and incredulousness in the blonde's voice, but she couldn't bring herself to care.

"I just figured it out right now," Alandra told her, sitting down slowly onto the ground, "He said that he was still evil, so I put two and two together. I blame it on the crack to my head." Alandra looked up when she felt Angel move closer to her, his large hand landing on the top of her head, gently massaging it with the pads of his fingers.

"Right then. You know where they are. I'm leaving to go get my Dru back. This fight gave me a new perspective. I just have to torture her till she wants me back," Spike said cheerfully before disappearing into the night. Alandra shook her head at him, amused by his antics, but was saddened at once again being unable to say goodbye. Angel could feel her sadness through the bond and bent down to kneel in front of her, making sure that he looked into her eyes. He was always amazed by how grey her eyes were. How the swirls could draw him in and keep him there.

"Are you alright," he asked, his voice soft. Alandra nodded and slowly stood up, groaning at the achiness of her bones and muscles.

"I'll be fine. I just want to sleep. Are you good to get Willow and Xander," Alandra asked Buffy who was already making her way towards the door.

"Yea. I just hope they're alright," Buffy admitted to them. The slayer didn't look tired, but the fear for her friends was clear on her face.

"Spike told me Xander was a little beaten up and Willow was probably scared out of her mind, but other wise they were ok," Alandra told her, making her own way to the door. Angel wrapped an arm around her shoulders as a way to help keep her up right and to give her some comfort.

"Like I'm really going to believe that," Buffy scoffed, "I don't know how you can trust him. He's evil."

"I agree," Angel said, his voice low and growling.

"I don't want to talk about this right now. I just want to go to my bed," Alandra said to them. She felt her body sway back and forth slightly and was grateful when Angel lifted her up into his arms.

"You take her home," Buffy told him, "I'm going to go get Cordelia and Oz to find Willow and Xander." Angel simply nodded before walking away from Buffy and heading towards Alandra's house.

They were silent for most of the walk, Alandra resting her head against Angel's shoulder. She didn't really know what to say, but she knew she wanted to say something to him about her relationship with Spike.

"I know you hate Spike," Alandra began, but Angel cut her off before she could continue.

"I don't hate Spike. Our past is… complicated, which makes our relationship, or lack there of, complicated. But I don't trust him, and neither should you. He's evil and will kill you in a heart beat if it meant he got his way," Angel told her. Alandra couldn't believe that. She knew what Spike was capable of, but she also knew that he was different from other vampires, even from Angel. She saw the way he treated Drusilla, the way he treated her even, and couldn't see what Angel and Buffy seemed to see.

"Spike's different isn't he," Alandra asked, expecting the silence that greeted her, so she kept going, "He's not like other vampires. He has the capacity to love. That's why I trust him. Because some how at the end of it all, he ends up doing the right thing. But I think you're worried about more than that," Alandra said to him. Angel opened his mouth to argue but Alandra leaned up and kissed his mouth softly. Soon the kiss intensified and became more frantic with them clutching to each other as if the slightest breeze would blow them apart. Alandra felt love pour out of her heart and into him, telling him everything she couldn't say with words.

"I love you," she whispered against his lips before kissing them again gently.

"I love you," he replied. They finally reached her house and Angel walked them around to her bedroom window. It had a small balcony on it and he jumped, landing neatly on it without jostling her much.

"You could have come in and taken the stairs you know," she told him, a small amused smile on her face as he lowered her to the floor inside her room.

"This way was faster," he replied, a smirk on his own face.

"Do you want to stay over tonight," she asked, her heart beginning to race. Angel could sense her sudden nervousness and smiled gently at her before shaking his head no.

"You get some rest. I'll come and see you tomorrow. Good night mo chroí," he said before grabbing hold of one of her hands and kissing her bruised knuckles. Alandra smiled at him as he faded into the night. She felt the loss of his presence keenly but took the moment to enjoy her solitude for a moment. She hadn't really had a moment to herself since Angel had returned.

As she changed and prepared for bed she didn't see the small glow of a cigarette beside the tree near her window.

~0~0~

She had only been asleep for about an hour when she heard the knock at her window. She knew it wasn't Angel and grabbed the stake and holy water that was beside her bed before heading towards where the knock came from. Her muscles cried out to her to stop moving as she inched her way over, gasping when she pulled the curtain back and saw Spike. He stood on her small balcony with a smug smile on his face.

"Sorry to disrupt your beauty sleep cutie," he said as he flicked his finished cigarette towards the lawn once she opened the window. He enjoyed seeing the happy smile on her face, he knew that it rarely happened now.

"What are you doing here Spike," Alandra asked, unable to contain her excitement,, "You should be halfway to Brazil by now."

"Wanted to say good bye properly before I left. Make sure you're all right," he told her as he leaned back against the railing. Alandra laughed at his attempt at trying to be nonchalant.

"I appreciate it, and I'm fine. I know you're the big bad and evil. And they tell me I shouldn't trust you," Alandra told him, playing along with the façade he built himself.

"And you shouldn't trust me luv," Spike replied. Alandra smiled softly before continuing on.

"You were the one who kept me sane when I really needed it. You were the only one there when I needed it. And we can pretend that you're evil and don't care about anything but yourself and Dru, but I know the truth. I can see it in your eyes. And I wanted to tell you thank you. For everything," Alandra said to him. She looked up and deep into his blue eyes. Where Angel's eyes were a warm brown, Spike's was a cool blue. But she could see that small hint of humanity left that they all say he shouldn't have.

"Sure luv," Spike scoffed, "Whatever you say. I need to head out before soul boy comes here and finds me." Spike stood up and began to turn around to jump down but was stopped by Alandra's light hand on his. He looked down at their clasped hands and then looked up at her, wondering what she was going to do. His eyes widened when she kissed him on the cheek. He didn't know how, but this girl was some how able to melt his cold and undead heart. He didn't really know what to think about it, or anything else he had been feeling that night. He knew one thing was for sure, he could never go back to Dru, could never be the same vampire he used to be. Alandra had changed him from the time he had known her, and he needed to get away from her before he lost all of his sense of self.

"I'll see you around luv," Spike said to her before jumping smoothly down to the ground, his leather duster billowing out gracefully. Alandra stood and watched him walk into the dark, a small smile on her face.

"I'll see you around Spike," she said quietly into the air.


	17. Chapter 17

"Hey Alandra," Faith said as she sauntered into the empty library. Alandra smiled brightly at her as she finished putting a small stack of books away.

"Hey Faith! What brings you by here today," Alandra asked, putting the last book on the shelf before stepping closer to the other girl and sitting at one of the tables. Faith placed herself on top of the table, a look of boredom on her face.

"There's no action right now, so I came down to see if anything was up here," Faith explained before giving Alandra a mischievous smile that reminded her a lot of Spike.

"So how are things going with Angel," Faith asked, and by the tone of her voice Alandra could see the direction she was going. She glanced at the other slayer quickly before looking forward once again, a small smirk lifting the corners of her lips.

"Things are going fine. And that's all I'm telling you," Alandra replied, amusement in her tone. She walked away to grab more books to put back in the stacks, leaving Faith to follow closely behind her.

"Oh come on! Angel is smokin' hot! Tell me you're not tappin' that," Faith practically begged, making Alandra laugh. For a moment Alandra felt like a normal girl talking about normal boy things with her normal friend. She could feel the weight of everything lifting off her shoulders with every freeing laugh.

"Alright, I won't then," Alandra told her, causing for Faith to groan in frustration. She stopped what she was doing to look at the other slayer with curiosity.

"Why are you so interested in what I'm doing, or rather not doing, with Angel," she asked, crossing her arms in front of her chest, waiting for Faith's answer.

"Because I'm bored and haven't seen any action of the male variety in months," Faith replied, making Alandra chuckle at her.

"So basically you want to live vicariously through me," Alandra asked. She couldn't help but feel more and more amused with every word her friend said.

"Yea, pretty much," Faith admitted, shrugging her shoulders lightly.

Alandra stood there and watched her for a moment, playfully pretending to decide if she would tell Faith about everything that was happening with Angel.

"Fine. I'll talk to you about him," she finally said, smiling at the happy face Faith gave her. When Faith smiled, genuinely smiled, it warmed her from the inside. She knew her friend had seen a lot of dark times, and to know that she was bringing some her some happiness made Alandra happy.

"So, have you two banged yet? I want almost all the details," Faith asked, her tone full of excitement and cheer as she sat down on the floor next to the tall book shelf beside Alandra's feet, looking up at her expectantly. Alandra looked down, a wide smile on her face, laughing softly before moving to sit down beside her.

"You certainly don't waste any time," Alandra said to her, "No, I have not 'banged him' yet as you so crudely put it. But our make out sessions have been getting pretty hot and heavy. I think the bond intensifies it. We feel each other's feelings on top of our own. It's actually pretty amazing."

"So what's the hold up? If the passion and feelings are there, what's taking y'all so god damn long," Faith asked, her face full of genuine curiosity about the relationship beyond the raunchy details .

"We both still feel too guilty. Him for what he did as Angelus, me for sending him to hell. I also don't really want him to see me," Alandra admitted, her voice falling to a nervous whisper. Faith's brow furrowed and the girl scooted closer to her, grabbing her hand as a sign of comfort.

"What do you mean? See you naked," Faith asked her. Alandra nodded her head slowly before pulling up a sleeve of her shirt revealing the scar-riddled arm.

"My whole body is covered in scars. I'm scared of what he'll think of me when he sees them," Alandra admitted, her voice soft as flashes of pain and torture tore threw her mind. Faith noticed the glazed look Alandra had but ignored it and moved the conversation forward. She was glad to see the emptiness leave when she spoke.

"He'll think of you as beautiful and strong. Which is the way he sees you now. None of that is going to change. Has Angel seen any of them," Faith asked, hoping her words could bring some comfort to her friend. She knew that no matter how many she told her, Alandra wouldn't believe them. Not until Angel saw the scars and told her himself. She knew that Alandra craved for acceptance, but was reluctant to open herself up to allow it in.

"Other than the odd one that pokes out from under my clothes, no. I also have a tattoo on my back. If Angel saw that he would flip," Alandra admitted, releasing a small sigh. She could see Angel's guilty face in her mind's eye. She didn't want to bring that to reality.

"A tattoo? Of what?"

"A gift from Angelus while I was in captivity. It's on my back in between my shoulder blades. I don't have any clue how Angel would take it, but not well," she replied, looking straight ahead at the book shelves in front of her, her eyes once again glazing over.

"Show it to me," a deep voice said from their side, shocking both girls. They both immediately jumped up, prepared to fight but relaxed when they saw Angel, hiding in the shadows. Alandra's eyes were wide as she watched him step out from the darkness, his face completely blank. She searched within herself where she usually felt his presence, her face falling when she felt nothing.

"You're blocking the bond? Why," she asked him, try to hide the hurt from her voice.

"Because I am very angry and I don't want you to feel that right now. Show me the tattoo Alandra," he commanded. That's when she saw that he was barely containing his demonic face. His brown eyes were constantly flashing yellow.

"I'll leave you two alone. I'll also lock up the library so no one else can come in," Faith told Alandra, occasionally sending wary glances to Angel, "Are you ok with him?"

"I'll be fine. Thanks Faith," Alandra told her. She never tore her eyes away from Angel, but saw from the corner of her eye that Faith had walked away from them. They waited in silence until they heard the click of the library doors locking, confirming their solitude.

"Un-block the bond Angel," she said softly, making him growl deep within chest.

"Not until I see what I did," Angel replied. She sighed at him before stepping towards him and placing a soft hand on his cheek.

"I'll show you after you unblock the bond," she told him. She gasped when she felt the wave of his anger, guilt, and sadness flood her. Angel watched as she stepped away, so overwhelmed by what he was feeling that tears welled in her eyes. They remained silent as she tried to catch her breath. The room filled with an electric tension as she slowly turned around and lifting her shirt up, revealing her back inch by inch.

She felt the cool air glide against her skin as she waited for Angel to say something. She could still feel the heat of his anger, but it had become sorrowful and full of the guilt he seemed to carry around with him every day. She released a quiet breath when she felt the rough pads of his fingertips smooth over the now healed tattoo, tracing the A before moving and tracing the scars that riddled her back. She tried to turn to face him, but he stopped her, keeping a firm hand on her hip.

"Not yet," he whispered before leaning down and kissing the tattoo. She sucked in a breath when she felt his cool lips touch her skin, and released it slowly when she felt him kneel down behind her and kiss the long scars along her back. He wrapped his arms around her hips, holding her body close to his as he worshipped her body with his kisses, an apology in every touch.

"I'm so sorry mo chroí. So so sorry," he whispered against her skin. Alandra turned around slowly in his arms, framing his face with her hands. She leaned down and placed a kiss on his forehead, then his cheeks, leaving his lips for last.

"I forgive you," she told him, tears beginning to stream down her face. She knew that telling him it wasn't his fault wouldn't do anything to relieve the guilt, but hopefully telling him she forgave him will.

"I don't deserve you," he told her in a whisper. Alandra smiled as she knelt down to be face to face with him, her cheeks still wet from her crying.

"Probably not," she joked before turning serious once more, "But you have me, and you're not going to lose me." Angel smiled widely at her, the largest smile she had seen from him yet. She could feel his relief through the bond and didn't fight the urge she had to kiss him.

It was a passionate kiss, full of relief and need. Alandra's skin tingled with excitement when Angel's hands ran down her back, the callouses of his palms gliding roughly against her scars. He held her close to him, wanting to feel her body as close to his as possible.

"I need you," Alandra whispered against his lips before kissing him again. Angel pulled back just enough to look at her.

"The soul," Angel began, but Alandra cut him off by placing her fingers lightly against his lips.

"Is tied to mine until one of us dies. Let's head to the mansion," she said, standing up and quickly grabbing her shirt to put it on. Soon they were rushing out of the library and at the Crawford Mansion.

~0~0~

"Put on your vamp face," Alandra commanded as they stood in Angel's bedroom. Angel looked at her confused but did as she asked. She took two long strides across the room and wrapped her arms tightly around him to bring his lips down to hers, surprising him enough to hesitate for a moment. He soon lost the hesitation and kissed her back, his teeth scraping lightly against her lips and tongue. She moaned softly before pulling away to smile up at him.

"You're kind of beautiful this way," Alandra told him, running her fingers lightly against the ridges of his brow before bringing them down to touch his fangs. He flinched and began to pull away, but she stopped him. Her hands cupped his cheeks firmly enough to keep his head from turning away from her, the pads of her thumbs rubbing light circles into the cool skin to soothe him.

"I love you because of who you are," she told him, her voice soft, "You're a vampire, but you're _my _vampire." She slowly pushed off his coat from his shoulders. Angel was silent, but his body was humming with anticipation as he watched her hands run slowly up and down his body. He could feel the heat of her body against his as he allowed his coat to fall to their feet before changing back to his human face.

"Leave it on," she said almost absentmindedly, her fingers moving to the buttons along his shirt.

"Alandra, you don't have to do that," he said, his voice low and husky. She shouldn't feel obligated to look at his vamp face when they made love for the first time. He didn't want to do that to her.

"I want you to leave it on," she said, her voice full of command, arousal flooding his body at the sound. Alandra's hands stopped half way down his shirt, gasping from feeling the power of his passion flow through her. He covered her hands with his, helping her to finish unbuttoning the shirt all the way down. Heat began to fill the room as the skin of her palms lightly grazed the skin of chest, both now breathing heavily as she pushed his shirt off his body.

Angel stood and waited and she ran her hands up and down his chest, sucking in a breath when her nails scratched along the seam of his pants. Alandra smirked at him then began to unbuckle his belt. She looked up with wide eyes when he stopped her, but just saw heat and want in his eyes.

"You first," he told her, smiling mischievously at the surprised look she had given him. He grabbed the bottom of her shirt and pulled it up, his knuckles lightly grazing her skin. Alandra raised her arms, allowing him to pull the shirt completely off. She laughed at the sudden lift into the air, wrapping her legs around his waist as he walked them over to his large bed.

He paused for a moment, concern suddenly washing over her and showing on his face.

"Are you sure you want to do this here? I know this place has bad memories for you," Angel asked her, looking into her eyes for any fear or hesitation. Alandra was so touched tears began to well in her eyes. She kissed him, trying to flood him with all of the love she held for him.

"I'm sure," she told him, smiling softly at him. Angel smiled back, kissing her collarbone before setting her down on the bed gently. He started his exploration at her neck, lightly nipping and sucking her skin, focusing at her pulse point. Alandra's eyes fell shut as she relaxed into the bed, enjoying the sensations of him moving down her body.

Angel watched her reactions, making sure that she enjoyed everything he did to her. He made sure to pay particular attention to any scars that he crossed paths with, kissing and licking and making her gasp. He enjoyed hearing her gasp and moan from his touch. He dipped his tongue into her belly button, smiling at the way she clutched at the bed.

"Should I take these off of you," Angel asked, smirking as he moved his lips along the rim of her pants, just lightly brushing the skin.

"Yes," Alandra hissed, glaring down at him.

"I don't know. You don't sound like you want it enough," Angel replied, his smirk becoming a full blown smile at the huff of frustration she released. He was surprised when she grabbed one of his hands and brought it up to her mouth to bite his palm hard.

"How's that," she asked sarcastically, making Angel laugh.

"What the lady wants, she gets," he replied, bringing his hand back down to unbutton and unzip her jeans. He pulled them off of her easily, leaving her in her bright yellow and purple underwear and bra. There were long scars crossing each other on her thighs, and Angel's guilt came back. Alandra wanted to comfort him but knew that he had to work it out on his own.

Angel leaned down to kiss the scars, trying to apologize with out words once again. He started with her calves and made his way up, his teeth lightly grazing the tender skin of her inner thigh. He could feel her pulse thump hard against his mouth, breathing in deeply to take in her scent. He looked up at her, asking for permission to remove her panties. When she nodded he brought his hands up to pull them off.

Alandra lifted her hips, nervousness beginning to creep in. She tried to learn whatever she could about sex, and she trusted Angel with her life, but she was worried she wouldn't be good at it.

"Relax, my love," Angel told her softly, lightly massaging her legs.

"What if I'm not good at it," Alandra asked, leaning up on her elbows. Heat flooded her body at the sight of Angel between her legs but made no comment on it.

Angel moved up so that his face was closer to hers, gently kissing her on the lips, trying to soothe her worry.

"You'll be magnificent. Just relax and let me take care of you," he told her. He waited until she nodded to move back to where he was, his head right in between her thighs. Alandra laid down again, relaxing back into the bed.

Angel waited till he was sure she was relaxed before bringing a hand up and spreading her nether-lips. He made a gentle but firm swipe of his tongue from bottom to top, sucking lightly on her clit at the end. Alandra moaned softly, and Angel could tell she was holding back.

"Don't be ashamed of making noise, mo chroí," he said before settling his attention back to her clit. He could feel her pleasure through their bond, making him harder than he has ever been. Her moans became louder and louder as he licked and teased, occasionally kissing the sensitive area of her inner thigh.

"Don't stop," Alandra gasped out, her fingers clutching to her his hair. Angel groaned against her as she ground his face, sending vibrations through her body. She could feel the coil tighten in her belly, her hands and body clutching and undulating, not knowing what to do with itself as wave after wave of pleasure went through her. Angel slowly entered one, then two fingers inside of her, creating a completely new sensation for her. She felt her body rock back and forth in time with his movements.

"Oh fuck," Alandra cried out, moaning lightly as the coil finally released. All of the tension left her body and sank slowly into the bed. Angel smiled to himself as he softly lapped at her, trying to capture her on his lips as much as possible, feeling a little smug that even after over a hundred years he still was able to make a woman cum with just his mouth and hands. It was a satisfying feeling.

Angel began to kiss his way back up her body, enjoying the feeling of the heat of her skin against his. He paused at one breast, licking slowly before taking the nipple into his mouth. Alandra ran her hands through his hair, humming in happiness as her fingers lightly tugged through the strands and clutched his head to her. He gave a light bite before moving to the next breast, giving it equal attention. She sucked in a breath at the nip he gave her, smiling as he finished making his way up to her face. They smiled brightly at each other, making the yellow glow of their bond begin. They felt love in their hearts, and it showed.

"Are you feeling better now, my love?," Angel asked softly, kissing her softly on the lips.

"Much better," she replied, satisfaction in her voice, "Now it's your turn." She flipped him onto his back, doing the same thing he did to her. She grazed her teeth along a nipple then the other, making Angel hiss in pleasure.

"You don't have to do anything Alandra," he told her, his voice rough with need.

"I know," she said, kissing and licking down his chest and belly, "But I want to." Not knowing how to reply he let her have her way with him. She quickly unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants, scraping her nails against his skin as she pulled them off with his boxers.

He could feel her nerves as she wrapped a hand around his shaft, dragging her tongue from bottom to top. Angel fought the urge to grab onto her head so made due with clutching at the bed, the sounds of material ripping filling the air.

"Tell me what to do," she told him, looking up at him with wide eyes, waiting for his instructions.

"Do whatever you want," he replied, "I'll tell you if something comes up." Alandra suddenly felt over whelmed but nodded, looking back down. He was large, but she didn't think he was too large to hurt her later. She wrapped her lips around the head, sucking lightly before lowering her head, taking in as much of him as she could.

"Use your hand, squeeze it lightly as you move up and down," Angel instructed, which Alandra promptly followed. Angel groaned softly, the sound making Alandra moan herself. She didn't realize until now how much control she had over Angel right then, and decided to experiment. Continuing the stroking motion she had with her hand, she moved her mouth down to take one of his balls in her mouth, lightly sucking on it before moving to the other. Angel moaned loudly, making Alandra smile. She was surprised when she felt his large hands on her arms, pulling her up and away from him.

"Did I do something wrong," she asked, suddenly worried. All of her worries disappeared when she felt his happiness and love through their bond. He kissed her, his tongue moving over hers sensually, tasting each other on their lips.

"You did amazing mo chroí. You did amazing. Too amazing actually," he admitted, making Alandra laugh softly. Angel kissed her again, flipping them over without breaking the contact of their bodies. It felt as if his hands were every where, tracing a trail of fire on her skin. She felt her nails dig into his skin as they began to grind against each other, the need becoming over whelming.

"If you want to stop, tell me," he said, his voice a whisper. Alandra smiled but shook her head no, grinding herself hard against him, making them both moan. Angel took that for the answer it was and began to position himself at her entrance. He used his hand to gently play with her clit, making her breaths come in hard pants, her chest pressing against his.

He made sure to move slowly, feeling as she stretched around him. Alandra felt the pain as he entered her, but it was slight as he continued to make her focus on what he was doing with his hands and mouth. He kissed and licked all over her collar bone and neck, gently dragging his teeth over her pulse point. Alandra moaned at the feeling of him inside her completely, and she felt closer to him than she ever had. They looked and found the bond glowing brighter than it ever had. Each touch of skin making them gasp or groan in pleasure, feeling everything two fold.

"Please, don't stop," she said, her voice a hoarse whisper. Angel buried his face in the crook of her neck, taking in her scent as he lifted them up so that she was in his lap. His thrusts were slow, the new angle making Alandra's head fall back, her eyes closed as she moved against him. She brought her hand to the back of his head, holding his mouth to her neck.

"Bite me," she said, knowing that it would surprise him. Angel pulled away to look at her, his yellow eyes still gleaming at her.

"No," he replied, but Alandra gently pushed his back to where it was, increasing the pace of their thrusts, making her heart race even faster than it was before.

"Do it," she commanded, making Angel nearly roar. He slid his fangs gently into her skin, the blood immediately pouring into his mouth. Alandra's mouth opened in a silent scream of pleasure. She released a long moan as she came, hard.

Her blood tasted so sweet that Angel quickly followed after her, making one last and hard thrust before releasing his hold on her throat to roar into the air, cumming inside of her. He went back to her neck, lapping up the blood with his tongue before lapping lightly at the small oozing wound. Alandra relaxed her body against him as he continued to clean the wound till it had stopped bleeding. Angel held her tightly to him, enjoying the sound of her heart beating against him.

"You didn't have to do that. I really wish you hadn't," Angel whispered against her skin, but Alandra heard every word loud and clear.

"I know I didn't have to Angel," she replied, pulling back to look into his now chocolate brown eyes, his human face back again, "But I love you, and I wanted to. So please don't start brooding over it and ruin our post-coital bliss." Angel smiled, just a touch of lips against hers before he lifted her up and laid them down along the length of the bed.

They were wrapped around each other, their bodies melding till they couldn't tell where one ended and the other began. Their bond continued to glow, having spread from the left arms to their heart now to their entire chest. Angel didn't forget what he was, and he knew that was the real reason of why Alandra had done what she had. For the first time in a long time, he finally felt at peace.


	18. Chapter 18

Alandra felt lost. Her closest friend had killed a man. It had been accident, but the fact that Faith had lied about it, tried to blame Buffy for it, it left Alandra feeling clueless on what to do. And now the new Watcher Wesley had fired Giles, leaving everyone to float aimlessly in the water that was their life. No one listened to the younger man and still went to Giles for advice, but Wesley held contacts that Giles no longer had, giving him a power that worried her. Everything felt like it was crashing down around her. But right now, she had to focus on Faith and what she had just seen her friend do.

"What are we going to do about Faith," Alandra asked Giles, still partially shocked from what she had seen. She had just seen Faith lie to her face about everything, and she was hurt. She thought Faith trusted her, just as she trusted Faith and defended her to the Scoobies, but now she didn't know what to feel.

"We just need to talk to her. Let her know that we're here for her," Xander offered, sounding hopeful. He looked more hopeful than anyone else did. Alandra would normally support this type of idea, but she saw the darkness in Faith's eyes. The other slayer was lost in the worst kind of way. She had gone rogue.

"If she's going to lie about what she's done, I don't think talking to her is going to do much," Buffy said, trying to reason with her best friend.

"Let me talk to her," Xander said, "We have a connection. I think." Alandra was confused by that but didn't argue the point and simply shook her head in exhaustion.

"She's working with the Mayor now. With a Slayer on his side he has a definite advantage until we know what he's planning," Giles told them, making fear spike through Alandra's heart. The Mayor was a wild card that none of them knew how to handle.

"They're going to try to distract us with something big," Buffy said, making eye contact with Alandra at the last moment. It was as if something had clicked when she looked into Buffy's eyes. The fear that hung over them whenever walked into the room, the hate the emanated from Giles and Xander when they saw him, the mistrust that they all carried with them except for Alandra. They both knew what the Mayor was going to try to do.

"He's going to bring back Angelus," Alandra said, her voice soft. She could hear the small gasps come from Willow and watched as a dark look came over Xander's face.

"We don't know if that's what he's going to do," Giles told them, trying to sound hopeful, but failing.

"Come on Giles, think about. He can have Angelus torture us while he goes on with whatever his real plan is. He knows that Angelus is one of our weaknesses. Angelus _knows_ all of our weaknesses. He's the best distraction," Buffy explained, sadness and pain clear on her face. Everyone had been traumatized by what Angelus had done to them, and it showed. They still carried Angelus's visit with them, some more visibly then the others, but it still weighed heavily on all of them.

"So we have to beat them to it," Alandra said, getting everyone's attention. She had a plan beginning to form in her mind. She just hoped it work.

~0~0~

"Hey Faith, is everything ok," Angel asked as he let in the dark slayer that stood in his doorway at the Crawford Mansion. She had a distressed look on her face, and although he knew what had happened he wanted to let her open up to him.

"I did something," Faith began, "I did something bad. Do you ever feel like you've done something so horrible that there's no way to come back from it?"

"All the time. Sit down and we can talk about it," he told her, directing her to the couch. He followed behind her, listening to he heart beat as she spoke. He could tell that she was truly upset over what she had done, but whether she was there to really talk about what she had done is another matter entirely.

"I just don't know what I'm going to do. I've been alone for so long that I just had to be accountable for myself. But now I'm friends with Alandra, and I'm so worried that she'll never forgive me for what I did. For lying about what I did," Faith explained to him. Angel nodded, sitting beside her, watching her every move. Alandra had become Faith's only friend. The only person that believed in her, the only person to believe that she will do the right thing. But she had failed her, and she hated the feeling of failure, even though she was familiar with it.

"Alandra is one of the most forgiving people I have ever met," Angel told her, a small smile at the thought of his love, "You just need to be honest with her. You're her friend. She just want's to make sure you're safe and happy."

"I just don't know how I'm going to redeem myself. Especially after what I'm about to do," Faith said, the tension sweeping into the room. Angel hadn't heard the demon that was now behind them enter the room. He heard the small creak in the floorboards and whirled around, growling loudly at the sight before him.

"What is this? Who are you," Angel asked, preparing himself for a fight. His body tensed, crouching slightly, preparing to pounce. The demon was shrouded in blue robes, the only thing visible were it's red eyes surrounded by blue skin of his face. It raised it's hands and began to chant, the words foreign yet familiar to Angel's ears. Angel felt a ripping pain sweep through his body as blue, yellow, and red orbs began to swirl around his body and encase him in light. Alandra walked in at the last moment, hearing Angel cry out in pain before the lights disappeared and made him crash to the floor.

Alandra felt fear cripple her into shock as Angel popped up from the ground, a sadistic smile on his vampiric features, his yellow eyes gleaming at her, his fangs glistening in the light.

"Hello lover," he said cheerfully, "Miss me?"

~0~0~

"What have you done Faith," Alandra asked as Angel, now Angelus finished locking the chains on her wrists. She was immediately brought back to the days of no food or water, pain and blood, screams of fear and exhaustion ringing constantly in her ears.

"I needed him," Faith said, walking up beside Angelus and wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Angelus wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her closer to him, then buried his face in her neck to take in her scent deeply.

"I thought I was your friend," Alandra asked, her voice wobbling with unshed tears and anger. She could have helped Faith, but she keeps falling into the traps that make her fall father and farther away from the path she was meant for. Guilt also swept into Alandra's body as she realized that she actually tried to help Faith at all.

"You are my friend Alandra," Faith replied, moving away from Angelus to kneel down in front of her, a sad look on her face, "You're my only friend."

"Why didn't you talk to me? We could have worked through this together. I could have helped you," Alandra yelled, surprising the slayer with the force of her passion. Faith smiled sadly at her before placing a soft kiss on her forehead.

"There's no helping me now. I'm a lost cause," Faith told her, standing up to step beside Angelus once again. The couple turned to walk away, leaving Alandra alone in chains.

"He'll turn on you. You can never trust him," Alandra called out, but they ignored her and continued to head to the back garden area to leave. Her last words as they made their way out of the mansion halted Faith for a moment.

"I'm not giving up on you Faith. Even if you've given up on yourself," Alandra called to their backs. Angelus guffawed at her words, turning around to face her.

"It's really cute that you think you can save her, lover," Angelus said, a smirk on his face, "We have a meeting with the Mayor. Don't wait up too late for us. And maybe when we return you and I can continue what we started a while back."

Alandra snarled at him, making Angelus laugh at her again. Alandra turned to Faith and saw the sadness in her eyes as she turned and walked away.

~0~0~

They returned soon, and found Alandra's head bowed in defeat as her arms hung from the chains. Her hair shielded her face, hiding the fear and anger in her eyes. Angelus stepped towards her, then kneeled before her, grabbing her chin to make her look him in the eye. It was so reminiscent of a year ago, but Alandra would not back down. She would not let her fear cripple her.

"Look at the lost little bird, so alone. I can't wait to clip your wings again," Angelus said to her, a smug smirk on his face. Alandra was silent, disconcerting Angelus slightly. He remembered her as much more talkative before. Maybe he had underestimated her strength once again. Suddenly, Alandra spat in his face, most of it landing in his eye. Angelus shoved her back in anger, her body crashing against the wall hard. Pain shot up her body, but she refused to voice that pain.

"You bitch," he said harshly, wiping the spittle away with his hand. He snarled in anger when he felt Faith's hand on his arm. He turned around to see an angry slayer, a stake gripped tightly in her hand. Her hand was gripped tightly on his arm, the slayer strength causing a small amount of pain, a warning.

"If you touch her, I will dust you," Faith told him, her voice even. Angelus scoffed before placing a long kiss on Faith's lips.

"Whatever you want baby," he said loud enough for Alandra to hear. Seeing Angelus kiss Faith made her heart break, tears springing to her eyes. Once again she had to stand on the sidelines as the man that wore her loves face paraded around, all to hurt her. She said nothing as she watched them, tears creating wet trails down her cheeks.

"The Mayor is going to destroy everything isn't he," Alandra asked, turning the couple's attention to her, "He's going to use the Hell Mouth's power for something big and instead of stopping it, you're going to help him."

"He's all I have. My only family. And once he ascends, everything will be perfect," Faith admitted, the pain she had gone through over the years shining in her eyes, but Alandra would not be swayed.

"He wasn't all you had. You would just rather do the easy thing rather than do the right thing," Alandra told her, making the dark Slayer fume with anger. She hated seeing Faith like this; lost and confused and thinking that she was all alone in the world.

"It's not like anyone needs me anyway. All I hear is, 'That's not how Buffy would do it. Buffy does it this way. Do it more like Buffy'. That's all I hear; Buffy, Buffy, Buffy. Well I'm not Buffy, and it's time everyone learned that," Faith told her. Alandra's eyes widened at her words. That's what had been bothering Faith. Constantly being compared to Buffy, being told to be just like Buffy when she was nothing at all like the blond. It all made sense now.

"You're right. You're not," Buffy's voice said from the darkness. Faith and Angelus spun around, but only Faith looked surprised. Faith turned back to face Alandra at the sound of Alandra releasing herself from the chains. Faith's eyes widened, her brain still trying to comprehend what she was seeing, anger replacing shock with every moment that passed.

"What is she doing here," Faith asked Angelus, but his face was an emotionless mask as he remained silent.

"What's going on," she nearly yelled, panic now settling in with the anger.

"We knew you're were going to try to bring back Angelus Faith," Buffy told her, stepping towards her in the center of the living room. Faith looked at Angel then Alandra.

"You tricked me," Faith said, her voice dark. Alandra took a deep breath, trying to get her own emotions under control.

"We needed to know what the Mayor is planning," Alandra said, "And I wanted to try to talk to you."

"This was the only way you could think of talking to me," Faith yelled at her. Alandra knew that Faith was right, but they were running out of time, and they needed the information now.

"Would you have listened to me if it _were_ any other way," Alandra yelled back before taking a deep breath and trying to calm down, "Please don't do this Faith. We can work through this together."

"I don't think so," Buffy said then took a swing at Faith from behind. Faith was knocked to the ground but quickly bounced up onto her feet and punched Buffy back. Alandra tried to stop them, but Angel placed a large hand on her arm, holding her in her spot. She watched as the Slayers fought, punches and kicks either being blocked or landing on their target. Somehow they both ended up on their knees, knives at each other's throats.

"You don't have it in you to kill someone," Faith said, a smug smirk on her face, Buffy remained silent as she looked at her sister Slayer.

"Never change B," Faith told Buffy, kissing her quickly on her forehead, standing up and running towards the back door to the garden. Buffy remained where she was, looking sadly to Faith as she made her way to the door. Alandra took a step forward, wanting to chase after her, but Angel's hand on her arm stopped her. She tried to break free but his grip was too firm, holding her in her spot.

"I meant what I said Faith," Alandra called to her back, making Faith pause at the door to look at her for what might be the last time, "I'm not giving up on you."

"I'll see ya around Alandra," Faith said to her then finished her escape to the outside world. Angel finally let go of her, making her anger fill her body. It was so intense that her hands began to tremble, her usually grey eyes beginning to bleed yellow. Alandra immediately rounded on Buffy who was barely standing up from her knees. She stomped towards her, so close that their chests were nearly touching.

"Why did you do that! I was getting through to her," Alandra yelled into Buffy's face. Buffy crossed her arms and glared back at her, unbothered by the show of Alandra's fury.

"No you weren't. You just hope you were. How do you think it was going to go down once she did find out it was a trick? Do you think she would have still come back to you with open arms," Buffy snapped back, "She's my friend too."

"I had to at least give her the option! But you took it away from her! You were only here if things got sticky. That was it! But you had to rush into it like you normally do," Alandra hissed. She could feel power and adrenaline coursing through her veins. A growl was forming deep in her belly, her gums throbbing as small fangs began to slowly fall. She could feel sparks crackle over her skin, could practically see it. Buffy showed no sign of fear except for the small spark that was in hidden in her eyes. Buffy had never seen Alandra so angry, and only feared what would happen if she got out of control.

"That's enough Alandra," Angel's calm voice washed over her, soothing her enough to calm down. The fangs receded, but the yellow of her eyes still burned into Buffy. Alandra was sad and angry and itching for a fight.

"We need to find out what the Mayor becoming Ascended means and what he's going to need for it," Buffy said, her tone professional, ignoring the hot fury that was still rolling off of Alandra in waves. The air was still tense, but Alandra tried to reign her emotions in. Angel could feel her inner turmoil and watched as she squashed it, replacing her anger with an emotionless mask. He hated seeing that look on her face. That was the look Angelus gave her. That was the mask of her survival.

"I'll get Giles and Willow on it. The sooner we find out what's going to happen the better," Buffy finished, speaking more towards Angel then to Alandra now. Alandra remained silent, just watching the blonde as she spoke to Angel. She felt insulted by it. The way Buffy spoke to Angel like she wasn't there, like this didn't affect her as well. Soon Buffy was gone, leaving the couple alone in a tense silence.

"Why didn't you let me stop them," Alandra asked, "They didn't have to fight. We could have gotten to her." She stood and watched and waited for some sort of reply from Angel, but he remained infuriatingly silent. As the seconds ticked by and she felt his emotions flow through her she realized why.

"You think trying to get through to Faith was a waste of time," Alandra answered for him. Her head lowered in disappointment, her eyes looking at her feet. Angel grabbed her hand, but she snatched it away, moving to pace back and forth in front of the couch. It reminded Angel of a tiger trapped in a cage with nowhere to go but prepared to pounce and fight it's way out at a moment's notice.

"Not a waste of time," he replied, "Just not the right time. Finding out about the Mayor's plan was more important tonight." Angel stopped her pacing by wrapping his arms around her and holding her to him. Alandra took a deep breath in defeat and exhaustion as she melted into his embrace.

"We'll find a way to get her back," Angel told her, but the sad sigh told him that Alandra had begun to lose hope. Nothing seemed to go the right way for his love. He wished he could simply fix everything for her, but that wasn't how it worked.

"I hope so," Alandra whispered, resting her head against his chest. Angel ran his fingers through her hair, purring softly as he held her tightly to him.

"Are you purring," Alandra asked, pulling her head back to look at him with a bemused expression.

"No," he answered, but the smile on Alandra face told him she knew he was lying. She pushed up onto her tip toes to kiss him, her lips moving softly over his. He deepened the kiss as he placed his hand on the back of her head and bringing her body closer to his, his tongue entering her mouth and gently massaging hers. He was lost in her taste, but the sound of her quiet moan brought him back to reality. He pulled back, a worried look on his face.

"I'm sorry," he told her, but Alandra was confused at what he was apologizing for. It felt like he was always apologizing for something and felt like a relationship shouldn't be full of 'I'm sorry's.

"For what," she asked him, watching him closely as his face broke from it's emotionless mask.

"For putting you through what I did earlier," he explained. He was surprised at the way Alandra kissed him again. She practically pounced on him, bringing his head down closer to her, her fingers lightly massaging his head. She pulled back, a bright smile on her face.

"I love you Angel. And I trust you with my heart and soul, and my life. There's nothing for you to apologize for," she told him, but she could still see the hesitation and guilt in his eyes. She sighed, look at their touching bodies before looking back up at him from beneath her lashes.

"I can think of a couple of ways you can make it up to me," she said, a mischievous smirk on her face. She yelped slightly when she was lifted into the air, immediately wrapping her legs around his waist, her smile being reflected back to her on his face, but it still didn't fully reach his eyes.

"I think I can do that," he replied, his voice low and husky. Her squeals of delight and his laughter could be heard through out the entire mansion, the happiness dispelling some of the dark.


	19. Chapter 19

"What do you mean Willow was kidnapped," Alandra yelled out. Her body was shaking with fear and anger for her missing friend. Willow was the one person that hadn't wavered in her kindness and friendship, if anything happened to her Alandra will be out for blood. She tried to take a few deep breaths to calm herself enough to listen to the gang's words.

"We were trying to get the box that we knew had something to do with the Mayor's Ascension and Willow was captured in the process," Buffy explained, clearly upset by what had happened. Despite everything that happened between the two of them, this was something that Alandra could understand. She knew that Buffy and Xander were hurting at the potential loss of their friend. She was tired of this, of always worrying about someone else's life. She had to do all she could to help bring Willow home unscathed.

"So how are going to get her back," Alandra asked, barely registering the large box Giles and Wesley were currently standing beside in the school library.

"We're going to trade the box for Willow," Buffy told her. Alandra nodded, accepting her answer for what it was. She wasn't sure what the importance of the box was, but if it was the best and safest way to get Willow back then so be it.

"Are you serious," Wesley asked, an annoyed and confused look on his face, "This chest is the only way we can know what the Mayor's planning and what this Ascension means. We are not giving up the box for Willow. I care for Willow just as much as the rest of you, but this is about the greater good."

"Fuck the greater good," Alandra said, making Wesley gasp in shock. Alandra's anger resonated in her voice, her eyes flashing yellow as she glared at the young watcher. Everyone looked at her with wide eyes, surprised by how much vehemence Alandra held in her voice. Buffy was the only one that didn't seem fazed by her anger, stepping towards Wesley with her arms crossing her chest.

"The Watcher's Council hasn't done anything except be a pain in my ass," Buffy said to him, "We're using the box to get Willow back. If you have a problem with that then you can leave." Wesley remained silent, trying to make himself taller to seem more imposing but they all knew that he wouldn't win. Once Buffy put her mind to something, nothing would stop her. And this was something that all of the Scoobies had her back on.

"Very well," Wesley finally agreed, some of the tension releasing from the room, but the darkness of Willow's capture still hung over their heads.

~0~0~

Angel and Alandra were in Giles's office, watching over the box as the other prepared for the coming of the Mayor and Faith. She could tell that something was weighing heavily on Angel and that he wanted to speak to her but couldn't do it for some reason. It worried her. He never had problems telling her things before and it made her begin to think she might have done something wrong.

"What's wrong Angel," she finally asked, stepping towards him to make sure that she could look into his eyes. He looked down at her, wrapped his arms around her and held her to him.

"I'm going to be leaving to move to Los Angeles," Angel told her, his voice soft as he waited for her reaction to his news. He could feel her tension in her body and the anger that was flowing through her. Her back was rod straight, her hands clenched into fists, her grey eyes smoldering with fury. He loosened his hold on her to look down at her and saw the way she looked into the distance, too upset to look him in the eye.

"What do you mean you're leaving for LA," she asked, her voice even and calm

"My time here has a come to a close. It's time to move on," he explained, but he knew the vagueness of his answer just made her even more furious. Alandra pulled out of his arms and stomped away. Angel stood in patient silence as he watched her pace back and forth, trying to expel her anger in some way. He remained still when she came to a stop, but he wanted to wrap her in his arms again at the pain that was in her eyes along with the anger. She took a step towards him again so that their chests were nearly touching, and although there was intimacy in the position there was no happiness like before.

"Move on? What about us? I thought we had a good thing going here," she replied, her voice beginning to sound slightly frantic. He nearly winced at the pain in her voice, but kept the blank mask that he relied upon to hide his emotions from the world.

"I know it may not seem like it, but I was hoping you would come with me," he told her, holding in a needless breath for her reaction. Her body began to shake with anger once again, and he just wanted to take it all back. He wanted to promise her that he would stay with her till the end of time. It physically pained him to tell her that he was leaving, but Giles was right. Alandra was too young to be attached forever to something like him. He had to ask despite his better judgment, because his heart couldn't give up on her so easily.

"And _this _was how you thought to ask me," Alandra replied, her voice low, "You didn't even speak to me about it? You just assumed I would go? I thought I was worth more than that!" She was yelling at the top of her lungs by the end of her sentence, making Angel wince slightly. He moved to wrap his arms around her, but for the first time in a long time she pushed him away. Angel could feel the emotional gap he just built between them widen with every spoken word.

"You are my everything Alandra," he told her, his voice even. He tried to hide the hurt he was feeling, but he knew that she could feel it through their bond. Her anger was all consuming and pure fire.

"And this is how you treat someone that is your everything," Alandra asked, but Angel decided to move past her point. He was selfish and needed to know now.

"Will you come with me? To LA," he asked, still hopeful even despite her anger.

"Maybe I like it here in Sunnydale, did you think about that? Besides, there's nothing for me in LA," Alandra answered, her words breaking his heart. Angel knew in that moment that despite everything they've been through, despite all that he wished to bring her with him, he was going to a place that she couldn't go. But despite this knowledge, he felt sadness and anger at her words. It felt like she was giving something up because of one mistake.

"I would be there," he told her, his voice thick with emotion. He looked into her eyes and saw her anger soften a bit, turning into the hurt that he had caused her.

"And what are we going to do for money and food and clothing? What am I going to do other than sit around the place with you. I'm not a vampire Angel," Alandra said to him, her own voice breaking towards the end. Her logic was sound, but her words brought hope back. It sounded as if she was considering his proposal.

"We'll figure it out," he told her, moving towards her to hold her, thankful that she allowed him to this time. She rested her head on his chest, and he could feel her tears seeping into his shirt, "Will you come with me?"

"No, I won't," she said, pulling back to look him in the eyes. Tears were streaming down her face, her body shaking as the realization of what her words meant for them hit her hard. It shocked him, hearing her refusal. Everything felt as if it was crashing around him, caging him in to his previous loneliness. He felt her tears as if they were his own and once again needed to know why. Always needing to know why.

"May I know why," he asked, trying to keep his emotions from coming to the surface as much as possible. It was pointless since she could feel everything any way, but knowing that she couldn't physically see the pain her words were causing him helped him somehow. He didn't want her to feel guilty for anything.

"Other than the way you asked me, or rather didn't ask me. I have bad memories of LA, memories that I don't want to go back to. I came here to escape, and going back would make it feel like all the hard work that I've done would have gone to waste. I also feel like I'm needed here," Alandra explained to him. She knew that she would have to tell Angel about what had happened with her mother eventually. She trusted Angel with her life, and even though she loved him, he just proved that he can't be completely trusted with her heart.

"You're not a slayer," Angel told her, making her anger come back in full force. She punched him hard in the chest, and Angel was surprised that he actually felt a small amount of pain. He began to wonder how much of an effect the bond was having on her.

"I know I'm not. And I'm not trying to be," Alandra hissed at him, "But I feel it deep in my bones. I'm here for a reason, and I'm not leaving till I figure out why."

"Very well," was all Angel said. All he could think of to say. He knew that Alandra was stubborn, and she would not quit until she found her answers.

"You're still going to leave," Alandra asked, still full of anger from Angel's last comment. He nodded, sighing in exhaustion from the emotional roller coaster ride that was the conversation.

"Yes. The same thing that is keeping you here is taking me there. My time is up here. It's time to move on," Angel told her. He could feel the pain his words brought, making his eyes widened as he realized what his words sounded like. Like she wasn't important to keep him there with her. And deep down he was glad she had said no to coming with him. She needed to live her life without being in the dark with him.

"I love you Alandra," Angel said vehemently, sweeping her into his arms and placing a bruising kiss on her lips. Alandra relaxed in his hold, allowing herself to take comfort in him. Angel pulled back, placing a hand on her cheek and rubbing soothing circles into her skin with his thumb.

"I love you Alandra," he repeated, "I meant move on from here, not move on from you. I could never give you up."

"And yet you're about to anyway," she replied, her bottom lip pouting slightly. He rubbed his thumb across it, taking in her features. Her hair had grown out a lot from when he had first met her, now falling towards the middle of her back, but it was still as curly as ever. He could feel her muscles now where she used be soft, but he loved everything about her, her entire being and who she was.

"Hey guys," Buffy called, crashing into the office. She looked sheepish at interrupting what was clearly and intimate and emotional scene between the couple. Alandra pulled away from Angel, a mask falling over her features. It worried Angel how easily she could do that now. She was always his light, but he could feel the shadows in her heart and he wondered if him leaving was going to do something to her that would be irreparable. Not just between them, but to herself.

"Sorry," Buffy said, "But the Mayor is here with Willow. We need you to come to the cafeteria."

"Coming," Alandra said, walking out past Buffy at the door, leaving the former couple standing in her wake. Buffy gave a confused look at Angel, wondering what was going on with them.

"Is everything alright," she asked, hoping Angel would answer her properly and not vaguely like he normally does. She still cared about Angel deeply and wanted to see him happy, even if it wasn't with her.

"I told her that I was leaving for LA. She's now very angry with me," Angel told her. Despite their past, Buffy would always be his friend and hold a special place in his heart. He owed it to her to be honest with her. Buffy chuckled and shook her head at him. Angel waited for her to elaborate on her actions.

"You drop massive info on her when one of her friend's is in danger and you hadn't spoken to her about it before? She deserves to be pissed about that. I'm not saying we're besties or anything, but I'm on her side on this one," Buffy said, beginning to move towards the door way, "You better find a way to make it up to her."

"Let's go deal with this Mayor and get Willow back," was all Angel's reply before following Buffy out of the office with the box in hand and heading towards the meeting place.

~0~0~

"The box for Willow. That's the deal," Buffy told the Mayor as the Scoobies stood across from his crew in the dark cafeteria. Willow was struggling against Faith's hand on her neck, a small bruise forming on her cheek.

"You're really going to give up the only thing that would prevent my Ascension," the mayor asked, "I don't know whether you stupid or brave."

"How about really pissed off," Buffy replied, glaring at the older man. The mayor smirked then looked towards Alandra. She glowered at the older man, her arms crossing her chest, her back straight, her feet spread wide, her body ready to fight at a moment's notice.

"I don't think we've met yet, but Faith has told me a lot about you. You have a bond with a vampire. One of true love. Those are incredibly rare, did you know that," the Mayor said to Alandra, his voice cheerful. Alandra raised her chin, looking down her nose at him. She didn't like what his tone was implying. The man was dangerous and just crazy enough to unpredictable.

"Your point is," Alandra snarled, her teeth bared at him. Angel moved to stand just behind her. She was still carrying her anger from earlier, the yellow beginning to bleed into her eyes. Even though she wasn't happy with him right now, she was glad that Angel was there to have her back.

"I just find the whole thing incredibly interesting. That you love the man that tortured you into merely a shell of yourself. What is it like," the Mayor asked her. Alandra glanced at Faith, seeing the guilt behind her dark eyes before looking back at that Mayor.

"Oh, it's great. What's it like to know you're going to lose," Alandra asked back, her snarl becoming a malicious smirk. Her eyes began to glow yellow in the dark. If the Mayor was surprised, he didn't show it.

"I think you're mistaken my dear. Now with the box that is about to be back in my custody, the Ascension will happen as planned and you all will taste so delicious when it happens. I was thinking about doing it Graduation day. What do you think," the Mayor asked into the air, the room completely silent except for the quiet and heavy breathing of Willow as she continued to try to struggle against Faith.

"You're going to lose Mayor, because men like you always lose," Alandra replied, her voice full of confidence. She ignored the wide eyed look of disbelief Wesley sent her way and just continued to watch the Mayor as he chuckled at her. He opened the lid just enough to let loose a small creature from it's depths. It was a large spider-like creature that scurried across the walls. It immediately began attacking the Scoobies, Wesley shrieking in the background. Alandra looked around, trying to keep an eye on it but losing sight of it quickly. She felt something large land on her shoulder, the long legs moving against her skin. Angel had begun to move towards her to help her but was not fast enough. Her stomach fell from fear, but just as she was about to knock it off the sound of wind hissed passed her ear, a large thud sounding behind her. Everyone looked up to see Faith's knife buried deep into the creature and the cafeteria wall.

Wesley shrieked again, green ooze dripping out of the creature and down the wall. Faith threw Willow towards Xander before grabbing the chest and leaving with the Mayor. Angel was beside Alandra's side in a flash, looking over her for injuries.

"I'm fine Angel," Alandra told him, shooing him off with a wave of her hand. Shocked by the exasperation in her voice, Angel stepped back and gave her room. Alandra didn't look at him as she walked over to Willow to make sure her friend was unharmed. Angel felt Giles stepped beside him and simply glanced at him as they watched the Scoobies interact.

"What did she say," Giles asked Angel, pulling his glasses off to clean the lenses.

"She said no. This is the angriest I've ever seen her," Angel admitted to him. Giles nodded, looking at the vampire. He didn't like Angel. He would never forgive what he did to Alandra or Jenny Calendar, but he respected him on a very small level.

"When will you leave," Giles asked him, their voices soft so as not to carry over to the teenagers.

"After graduation. Have you found a way to break the bond," Angel asked him, ignoring the anger that was seeping over to him from Alandra.

"No, I have not," Giles replied, sounding disappointed in the fact. He felt as if Angel had trapped Alandra, and was angry at himself for not finding anything on breaking the bond, yet.

"Is it selfish of me to say that I'm glad," Angel asked more to the air than to the other man. Giles answered anyway.

"Yes. You don't deserve her. Especially after what you did to her. I wish I could find a way to separate her from you. She deserves to live a long and healthy life, in the sun. Not with a vampire," Giles told him, hate clear in his voice. Angel looked at the man that had become a father figure to the Scoobies. He knew he would never gain the man's forgiveness, but would work for redemption every day. They had had this conversation before, leading Angel to decide to leave, but hearing those words still broke him.

"I know. Which is why I'm leaving. When you find a way let me know and we'll get it done as soon as possible. The least Alandra knows the better," Angel said to him. Giles barely had time to nod before Angel disappeared into the dark. Alandra looked around the cafeteria to find Angel to apologize for a small amount of her cruel behavior and was severely disappointed and saddened when she couldn't find him anywhere. She began to wonder what was going to happen to them now.


	20. Chapter 20

"Alandra, do you mind going with Angel to these offices to find my contact about the Ascension. Buffy and the others are currently out on patrol," Giles asked the young woman as he handed her a slip of paper with an address on it. He hated to force her to be in the same room as the vampire, but he needed someone to go this instant in case his contact left town for fear of consequences with the Mayor. Alandra nodded, taking the paper silently, her face sullen. She hadn't spoken to Angel for days and it seemed their separation was taking a toll on her.

She left Giles's office and walked to the phone to call Angel. The call was short and to the point, telling him to meet her at the address Giles had given her and nothing more. Giles was worried for the girl and wondered what it meant for her once Angel left for LA.

~0~0~

"Hello mo chroí," Angel greeted when he reached the door to the offices where Alandra was standing. She looked as beautiful to him as ever, her dark hair blowing gently in the light breeze, her skin glowing beneath the pale light. He couldn't help but think of her as ethereal in that moment.

"Do not call me that," she replied, her voice dark as she stepped past him and into the office. Angel ignored the pang of pain in his heart and followed closely after her. They walked in and soon realized that Giles contact was either dead or had left town a long time ago in a hurry. Papers were scrambled all over the place. Chairs were overturned, drawers thrown to the side.

"Let's find whatever we can to help us and get out of here as soon as possible," Alandra told him. Angel nodded and the two split up and searched through paper after paper, drawer after drawer, for any information on the Mayor or the Ascension. Alandra came to a filing box filled with photos and printed papers, all talking about exactly what they were looking for.

"Here's some stuff about the Ascension and the Mayor," Alandra called to Angel. He searched through the contents of the box with her quickly before grabbing the lid an placing it on top, ready to be taken back to Giles. The atmosphere was cold between them and Angel wished he could find a way to get them back to a good place before he left.

"Your prom is coming up," Angel mentioned as they stepped out of the office and into the stair well.

"I'm not going," was Alandra's simple reply. She didn't look at him, touch him, barely even acknowledged his existence.

"You should go. Celebrate your graduation," Angel told her. Alandra paused, looking up at him. Angel waited with bated breath for her next words.

"Will you go to prom with me," she asked, her grey eyes shining with hope and emotion. Angel sighed, running a hand down his face. When he looked back at her, the hope was gone, leaving only cold stone.

"That's the only answer I needed," Alandra said, her voice as hard as ice. She began to walk out but Angel gently grasped her hand. She paused, glaring down at the hand that had once brought warmth and love with it's touch.

"I don't want to leave on a bad note Alandra. Don't this to us," Angel nearly begged. Alandra moved her gaze to his face, her anger washing over her as she ripped her hand out of his grasp.

"It was your choice to leave. It was your choice to tell me the way you did. I'm not even mad that you're leaving Angel. I'm mad that you didn't even mention it or discuss it before that night," Alandra explained to him. They made it back out to the relatively busy side walk. The cool night air soothed some of Alandra's anger but not much.

"What do you want from me Alandra? What can I do to fix this," he asked, the box underneath his arm. He followed her to the other side of the street, sweeping past the passers-by that stepped past them.

"I don't fucking know Angel," Alandra yelled at him, drawing the attention of a few pedestrians, "I don't know if you can fix this! You made a decision without me even though it affected both of us. It's like you didn't trust me enough to understand why you were leaving."

"I do trust you," Angel told her, his voice raising volume as well, "I just didn't know how to tell you!"

"I'm done with this conversation," Alandra said, beginning to turn around. She gasped as she felt pain from Angel's side of the bond, a physical pain and quickly turned to look to see what was wrong. She found an arrow coming out of Angel's chest, blood already seeping through his shirt. He crashed to the ground, Alandra immediately by his side. She place his head in her lap, her hands trembling as she tried to stop the blood. She barely registered the box at his side, some of the papers being lifted away by the breeze.

"Angel! What's wrong? Angel," she cried out to him, trying to keep him conscious. He murmured a few words, but she couldn't understand what he was saying. She looked up frantically, trying to find any clue of who could have done this. It wasn't long before she saw Faith standing on top of the movie theater, lowering her bow. Alandra glared up at her, hate and fear for Angel burning through her body. She could see the guilty glint in Faith's eyes as the dark slayer turned around and disappeared. Tears began to well in Alandra's eyes as she tried to get Angel help.

~0~0~

Angel had been shot with a poison that only affected vampires. There didn't seem to be a cure and Alandra was nearly going out of her mind trying to take care of him and to keep the hope that he would survive. The Scoobies were all in the Mansion on Crawford Street, trying to take turns in taking care of him but Alandra refused. Every time Willow wanted to come in and take over Alandra would shoo her out, never looking away from her love. They were all beginning to worry about her.

"You need rest Alandra," Angel croaked out, sweating covering his skin and even paler than usual. He shivered every few moments, his fever beginning to affect his mind.

"I'll rest when you're well again," she replied, grabbing a cool wash cloth and resting it against his face then his chest, the coolness easing some of the heat that had spread through him

"Lay down with me for a while," Angel said, patting the space beside him. Alandra rolled her eyes but complied. She placed the wash cloth back in the bowl and crawled over him to lay beside him. She mostly sat with her back against the pillows, her arm going across over his head to play with his hair. Her other hand was holding his, her thumb rubbing circles into his clammy skin.

"What happened in LA," he asked her, his voice soft with the strain of the poison making him weaker by the hour.

"I don't want to talk about that now. I want you to rest," she told him. Angel looked up at her, his brown eyes swimming with emotion. It wasn't that she didn't want to tell him about her past, but she didn't want to bring even more heartbreak to the situation.

"I realized that I don't know everything about you," Angel told her. Her hand squeezed his in comfort as another set of shivers wracked his body. She waited until he stopped to speak again.

"I don't know everything about you," she pointed out, hoping to change the subject.

"That's because I'm so old it would take me 20 years to get through everything," he joked, making her smile. She knew that she was going to tell him. He deserved to know. Angel knew he had won at the small, quiet sigh she released.

"My mother was as a mother should have acted. She cooked and cleaned along with my father, she showed me love and read me bed times stories, soothed my hurt when I scraped my knee. And then when I was about 8 my father started leaving on business trips more, making more money. I don't know if she just became greedy or what, but she became cruel. She would blame me for my father leaving us for some reason. Then she was out all the time and gambling, leaving me alone to fend for myself. When she was around she say such mean things to me. How I was a waste of space, how I wasn't worth the pain of birth before and I wasn't worth it now. My father was gone all the time at that point so he didn't realize what was going on. Until the day he walked in on her hitting me. I was 16 by this point. We went through the court system, I asked to move to Sunnydale with my cousin. My mother was sent to jail, I moved in with my cousin, and then I met you and it was like a whole new world was opened up before my eyes."

They both fell quiet as her story began to permeate his mind. He can just imagine a young girl, her wide and bright eyes filled with happiness and love for a mother that had turned on her. He could see her try to work for a love she could never get, the fear on her face when she heard her mother's voice. He wanted to protect that Alandra, the one that hadn't realized how strong she was yet. She had been through so much and yet she was still so kind and warm and loving. He didn't deserver her.

"You're so beautiful," Angel whispered hoarsely. Alandra gave him a watery smile, her fingers combing through his damp hair.

"Rest for a little bit," Alandra told him, her voice soft and soothing, becoming entrancing as she whispered words of love and care into his ear. Angel slowly closed his eyes, his mind whirling thoughts of her as he slowly fell asleep. Alandra just watched him, his lack of breath and heart beat captivating her. His only sign of life is the twitches of his arms and hands and eyes as his dreams swept through him.

"Alandra," Willow's quiet voice echoed in the room. Alandra looked up, nodding before slowly moving away from her love and getting up from the bed and heading towards the door. Buffy, Xander, and Oz were standing in the living room, their faces full of concern. Something was wrong, Alandra could feel it deep in her bones.

"What's wrong," she asked right away, not allowing the looks on the Scoobies faces to deter her.

"We found the cure for the poison," Willow informed her. Alandra waited patiently for her to continue but saw the hesitation on the red head's face. Buffy finished for her.

"He needs to drain the blood of a Slayer," Buffy told her, looking deep into Alandra's eyes and Alandra knew exactly what she meant. Faith.

"Absolutely not," Alandra told them, making all of them groan in anger and frustration.

"If we don't do this then Angel will die," Buffy said, trying to make Alandra understand. But she couldn't do that to her friend. No matter how far Faith had fallen Alandra wouldn't give up on her.

"Faith is my friend. I can't trade one life for another," Alandra told her, making Xander grunt and pace in irritation.

"Some friend she is. She shot the love of your life with a poison that will kill him! She made her decision when she refused to come back to us," Xander yelled at her. Alandra felt anger pulse through her, her eyes bleeding yellow and fangs elongating past her lips. She could smell the fear roll off of Xander in waves but she would not back down.

"I am not giving up on her. I will not trade one life for another. Do not speak to me like a child Alexander Harrison," Alandra growled out, her voice taking on a dark quality. Buffy had only seen her this way once, and it was the fight with Angelus. Alandra said nothing else, whirling around and stomping back into Angel's room and closing the door.

"I'm bringing Faith," Buffy told them, they all nodded, still shocked from Alandra's actions.

"Be careful Buffy," Willow told her friend, a small smile on her face before disappearing into a sad mask. Buffy nodded before grabbing a stake and walking out to find her sister slayer.

~0~0~

Alandra had fallen asleep beside Angel and woke up to fear in her chest and Angel gone. She quickly shot up in search of him, finding him over an unconscious Buffy, her blood dripping down his chin. She had never seen such fear in his eyes as she realized what he had done.

"Please help me," he asked her, his voice still weak from the poison, but his color was returning to him.

"Let's get her to the hospital. Now," she yelled out the last part, quickly running to the other girl's side to assess her wounds. He had nearly drained her. If they didn't get her to the hospital soon, she would die.

A/N: Hey peeps! Sorry for the late update. I started school so I've just been going and going. I had wanted to do a thing for prom, hence the set up but it just wasn't fitting in, so just think of prom as happening while Angel is sick as disappointing as that is. Maybe one day I'll do a special one shot for it. We'll see. Also, if you like youtube you should check out my channel PotterHaven394. I also need to make a video for that, Im so behind on all my hobbies. Whoops! Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Love ya and see you next time!


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: This is it my friends for this part of the story. Thank you to everyone that has reviewed and encouraged me to finish this. Hopefully you all enjoyed it and keep an eye out for the next part of Alandra's story. I'll post the first chapter on here with the title so that you all know where to go! Thanks again loves, and please be sure to review.**

Alandra was scared. She was scared of Buffy dying. She was scared of what the Scoobies would do when they found out what Angel had done. She was scared of what Angel would do to himself. She was left in the waiting area as Angel carried Buffy into the emergency room, nurses and doctors immediately swarming around the injured blonde.

The Scoobies and Giles slammed into the emergency wing, worry and fear also on their faces.

"What happened," Giles yelled at her, making Alandra jump in her seat.

"Angel drank from Buffy. We brought her here as soon as we could," Alandra told him, her voice soft. Guilt washed through her at the sight of Giles's anger. She knew that she should have done more. She should have stayed up longer, should have set up some sort of bell in case Angel got up. Anything, something, to have prevented this. She felt the tears begin to well in her eyes but pushed them back.

"Why weren't you there watching him," Xander yelled at her next, stomping towards Alandra and glaring down at her. She had never seen such hate in his eyes before. It made her shrink herself, flashbacks of her angry mother blaming her for everything, flashbacks of an angry Angelus punishing her, all of these memories flooding her mind. She tried to take a deep breath to calm her fears, ignoring the hate in Xander's eyes as she spoke.

"I had fallen asleep. I woke up alone in the bed. When I went out to the living room and found Buffy injured I made sure to bring her here," Alandra told him, trying to keep her voice from shaking. She was thankful when she saw Willow, the redhead's face showing sympathy and understanding.

"That's enough guys," Willow spoke up, gently pushing Xander away from Alandra to give her some breathing room. Willow was about to say something soothing to her when Xander pushed past her and stomped towards Alandra once again.

"This wouldn't have happened if you had let us bring in Faith. This is all your fault," Xander yelled next. The entire group was surprised when Angel appeared and had him around the neck, holding his body up against the wall. Alandra got to her feet, but they wouldn't take her anywhere. She felt frozen.

"If you are to blame anyone, blame me. Do _not _bring her into this," Angel growled out at the teenage boy. Xander said nothing, but Angel knew that his message was loud and clear and released him. Giles suddenly grabbed Angel's shoulder to force the vampire to look at him, and punched him directly in the jaw with enough force to knock Angel back a step. Angel recovered quickly, his shoulders square, but he never tried to retaliate. Tears flooded Alandra's eyes when she saw the loss of hope gone from him. It's as if everything Angel had been working towards was crumbling around him, and she didn't know how to help fix it.

"Hey," a young female doctor stepped in between the men, "Either you calm down or you all get kicked out. Is that understood?" When she got nods of affirmation she walked away, but kept wary eyes on the group. Alandra felt her exhaustion settle into her mind, dragging her entire body to the seats once again. Willow sat beside her, placing an arm around her shoulders.

"It's not your fault Alandra," Willow whispered to her. Alandra finally allowed her tears to fall as soon as those words reached her ears. She wanted to believe it, but she couldn't. Her entire body began to shake, all of her emotions crashing down upon her. She felt so helpless and useless.

"I should have been awake. I should have been there to watch Angel and to make sure that he didn't hurt anyone. It _is_ my fault," Alandra said to her, her hands clenching her hair, a guilty and crazed look filling her eyes.

"It's not your fault Alandra," Giles told her, but his tone was gruff. She looked up at him and saw the disappointment in his eyes. She didn't know what to believe anymore. Everything was upside down and she didn't know how to handle it. Angel could feel her panic through the bond, bending onto a knee, his hands on her face to make her look at him. She couldn't get a breath in, her body was weak and she could see stars in her eyes. She knew that she would faint if she didn't breathe properly, but she couldn't get her body to listen to her.

"I need you to take a deep breath Alandra," Angel said, his voice firm but soft. She couldn't see past her fear of Buffy dying, because she wasn't watchful enough. Alandra could feel her body begin to rock back and forth, tears streaming down her face, her eyes wide with fear as she looked at Angel. He wanted to ease her pain, to fold her into him to create a safe place, but he knew she had to do it on her own.

"I should have been watching you. I should have made sure everyone was safe. It's all my fault," Alandra whispered to him, her eyes becoming more drawn and cloudy with every word she spoke. Angel shook her lightly, bringing her back from the recesses of her mind.

"Follow my breaths Alandra. Can you do that for me? Just follow my breaths," Angel told her, forcing his dead lungs to breathe deeply in and out. Alandra followed him, oxygen finally reaching her brain and calming her down. She felt her exhaustion hit her again, harder, and rested her head on Angel's shoulder. Angel lifted her up into his arms, glad that she had quickly fallen asleep. He glared at Xander at first, but quickly moved it to Giles.

"She will not be blamed for any of this. And the fact that you did it any way, even though you knew it wasn't her fault but mine is frankly cowardly. I'm taking her home. Let me know when Buffy wakes up," Angel said to the older man. Giles was about to argue but the vampire was gone in a flash. Willow stood up and punched Xander hard in the chest.

"Ow," Xander lightly cried out, looking down at the furious red head.

"Buffy is in critical condition and you blame Alandra. How dare you," she said, emphasizing her words with another punch to the chest.

"She should have been watching Angel," Xander replied, trying to defend himself. Giles sighed and ran a hand through his air, his own worry exhausting him.

"Willow is right. Alandra had nothing to do with this except for being attached to that bloody vampire," Giles told him. Xander first looked as if he would argue, but he said nothing at the look both Giles and Willow gave him. He groaned out in frustration, but he knew deep down they were right. It was unfair to blame Alandra for Angel's deeds.

"I just hope Buffy makes it through," Willow said, allowing her own pain and fear to come through. Her best friend was on a gurney, and even though they always faced death, this unknowing scared her the most. Xander wrapped his best friend in his arms.

"She will," Giles told them, "She has to."

Alandra was fast asleep, her emotions having taken a toll on her. Angel had never seen Alandra that way. Like her soul was crushing her from the inside out. That's why he loved her so much. She cared so much for other people, taking their pain onto her shoulders. Guilt flooded his own being and he knew that he had to leave after Graduation day. He had to let Alandra live. He couldn't let her live in the dark anymore because of him.

~0~0~

Her body and heart felt heavy when Alandra woke the next morning. Angel was fast asleep in the chair beside the bed, and Alandra just looked at him. He didn't breath, he didn't move. He was as still as a statue, and for the first time it unnerved her. She looked at him, truly looked at him, for the first time in a long time. This was the man that had tortured her till the brink of death. He carried that person in him, the demon with him all of the time. Having those whispers telling him to do awful and terrible things. She should hate him, despise him. He had hurt countless people.

That's why she loved him. He tried every day to redeem himself. He didn't listen to the whispers. He wanted to be a better person.

Alandra slowly stood up, the coolness of the floor helping to wake her up. She looked down at her rumpled clothes and decided not to change, simply brushing her hair and putting on her shoes. Her steps were silent as she walked out of the room, taking a long look at Angel as he slept in the chair. She wanted to touch him, to soothe the furrow in his brow, but she didn't want to wake him, otherwise he wouldn't let her leave. She needed to be alone for while. She sort her mind out and just be.

The sun was just coming up when she walked out of the mansion and walked to the hospital. She stepped into Buffy's room and grabbed the blonde's hand, squeezing it tightly. Tears were filling Alandra's eyes when she saw how pale Buffy was. It was hard to see someone so full of life look so dead.

"I know we've never really been friends. But you've become such a big part of my life that if anything happened to you, I don't know what I would do. All I know is that we need you. We wouldn't be able to do this without you. You carry a light around you and you're the reason why we're all here. So you have to make it through this Buffy. I've seen how strong you are, both physically and emotionally. I know you can do this. So wake up so we can kick Mayor ass. I believe in you, in a way I always have and I always will," Alandra said, her voice thick with emotion by the time she finished speaking. She stood up and began to walk out when she saw Faith in a gurney, also pale and in a coma.

Alandra rushed to her side, grabbing onto the dark slayer's hand. She knew the reason why she was in the hospital was because of Buffy, but she couldn't bring herself to be mad at the either of them.

"You are my friend Faith," Alandra began, tears once again filling her eyes, "And I'm still not giving up on you. I just hope that when you wake up you know that. I never gave up on you. And I forgive you." Alandra stood up and kissed Faith on her forehead and walked out of the hospital.

Buffy's eyes flew open and she took a deep breath. She quickly sat up, a determined look coming over her face. It was time to get to work.

~0~0~

"You guys ready to kick some ass," Buffy said as she stepped into the library, shocked faces at the sight of her. Alandra stood to the back when everyone ran to the blonde and showered her in hugs and kisses. Buffy was able to finally break away from the group and walked over to Alandra, tension filling the room. Alandra was surprised when the short girl wrapped her in a hug.

"It's not your fault. I forced Angel to do it. Please don't blame yourself or him," Buffy whispered in Alandra's ear. Alandra hugged the girl back, nodding and taking a breath of relief. For some reason, hearing those words come from Buffy set her heart at ease.

"What's the plan," Buffy asked once they pulled away from each other. The group was still mildly taken aback from the display of affection that it took them a moment to come out of it.

"The Mayor is Ascending today. And he's going to blot out the sun to do it," Giles told her. Buffy picked up on the words, soon understanding what Giles had meant.

"He's going to use vampires," Buffy said more to herself than to anyone else, pacing as she entered into her own thoughts. They all waited in silence, waiting to hear what what Buffy had to say. Buffy soon stopped pacing, a determined look coming over her face.

"I have an idea," Buffy told them, a smug smirk coming over her face.

~0~0~

The Scoobies ran around the school and Sunnydale, gathering fellow seniors and supplies for the fight ahead. Alandra could feel the adrenaline pumping, ready for the fight that was going to come.

She stopped at her cousin's place to change into more durable clothes, jumping slightly when her she saw her cousin standing in her door way through her mirror.

"Hey cuz," Lily said, her arms crossing her chest. Alandra turned around and stepped towards her.

"I just want to thank you for everything you've done for me Lily," Alandra told her. Lily smiled, giving her a tight hug. Alandra returned it, seeing the worried yet knowing look in her eyes.

"I know you got caught up in something here Alandra, and I know it's dangerous," Lily began, a proud smile coming over her face, "But I also know you're doing the right thing. That's why I'm leaving the house to you. I'm going to get out of California for a while, see the world and stuff for a bit. Everything is paid for. And you know your father has that account for food and stuff."

"Why didn't you tell me sooner," Alandra asked, sad that her cousin was leaving but also happy for her. Her cousin was someone that had been a rock for her through everything. Who will she go to now when she needed a friend, someone that she knew could give her unbiased strength and clarity.

"It didn't feel like the right time. I know you've been through a lot lately. But I also know that Angel loves you and that he'll take care of you," Lily told her, and Alandra couldn't bring herself to tell Lily that Angel was leaving as well. She was losing two important people in her life and she didn't bother to hide the sobs that were coming through. Lily grabbed the girl into another hug, tears spilling down her own face.

"I love you Alandra. Please stay safe," Lily told her, pulling away. Alandra nodded her head, too overcome with emotion to speak. She watched her cousin walk out of her home with a heavy heart.

~0~0~

All of the students sat with their caps and gowns on, waiting in anticipation for the final battle ahead. Principal Snyder was speaking, his droning voice nearly making Alandra fall asleep, but she perked up when she saw the Mayor step towards the podium. Her hands were shaking and her heart was beating with anticipation. She closed her eyes, praying to whatever listen to give her the strength to survive the battle.

Soon the Mayor's transformation began, his body twisting and molding into a large snake like creature. He gobbled up Principal Snyder, silencing the man forever. Buffy jumped out of her seat, shouting out, "Now."

All of the students jumped into formation, the students on the side holding flame throwers and showering the Mayor in flame. Alandra and a small group spun around to the front of the school, seeing an entire army of vampires appear as the sun disappeared behind dark and heavy clouds, making the city as dark as night.

Buffy ran towards the Mayor, Xander directing the students to the vampires. There was a loud roar of yells as the students ran down the steps, stakes and weapons in hand and attacking the vampires. Alandra felt a power rush through her body as she fought, her body not completely her own as she dusted vampire after vampire.

She saw Cordelia on the side dust her own vamp, proud of the girl when her eyes were directed to Angel. His movements were graceful as he fought through a small army of vamps himself. She ran to his side, taking down three in quick succession and ending up back to back with Angel.

"Glad you could join the party," Alandra quipped, punching and kicking her way through each enemy.

"Wouldn't miss it for the world," Angel said, then yelled for her to duck. Alandra dropped to the ground, amazed at the way Angel sliced through the circle of vamps' heads and making them all fall to dust.

"If I don't make it through this Angel," Alandra began, now fighting her own group of vampires and becoming separated from him, each one falling to dust and blowing in the breeze.

"I don't doubt you will," Angel yelled back, growling in anger when one vamp landed a punch to his jaw.

"All the same. I love you. And I don't want you to ever doubt that," Alandra yelled out to him, taking a punch to the gut. Angel saw her fall as a swarm of vamps over came her. He saw her hand get swallowed up as he screamed her name, unable to reach her.

He didn't know how, but the glow of their bond appeared, getting brighter and brighter. He was able to beat back his own vampires, turning around to see the yellow of the glow shining through the cracks of the swarm of vampires. He heard screeches of pain as the vamps tried to pull back but couldn't, their skin falling off and turning to dust. Angel saw her hand, trying to come through and when he reached for it, his fingers touching hers, a bright flash occurred, drowning them in light. He heard more than saw the cries of the vampires as they faded to dust and blew away.

Alandra was glowing brightly from the inside out. Angel could feel the warmth but it soothed him rather than injured him. Finally the glow faded away, leaving a shocked Alandra in it's wake. They just stared at each other, not knowing what to say or do.

The were broken out of their reverie when they heard a large boom. Angel looked up and pulled Alandra into his arms, shielding her with his body as the school went up into flames, rubble raining down on them. When it finally calmed down Angel let her up, looking at her to make sure she wasn't injured.

"I'm fine. At least, I think I am," Alandra told him, still amazed at what had just happened. Angel was too overcome say anything and just wrapped her in his arms, holding her to him. They broke apart when the Scoobies appeared, relieved smiles on their faces.

"We're going for celebratory drinks and food. Come with us," Buffy asked Alandra, hesitation in her voice. Alandra smiled at her, nodding in acquiescence, beginning to pull Angel with her, but he released her hand. A confused look entered in Alandra's features, silently questioning what he was doing.

"You go. I'll see you later," he told her, stepping away from her. Alandra slowly stepped towards the group, hurt on her face. She wondered if this was her goodbye. Seeing Angel's back as he walked away from her.

"Happy graduation day mo chroí," Angel said before quickly disappearing. Alandra felt two arms wrap around her shoulders. On one side was Willow and the other side Buffy.

"Lets go get some food," Buffy said, more to Alandra than to anyone else. Alandra nodded, following them but couldn't stop looking behind her back, trying to get sight of Angel.

~0~0~

Alandra's heart jumped at the sound of the door bell. Her heart was pounding with nervousness, knowing who it was before she even cracked open the door. Angel stood on her doorstep, his face blank but his eyes were telling her everything.

"Angel," she sighed out in relief, "I almost thought I wasn't going to see you."

"I wanted to say goodbye before I left," he explained. He looked deep into her eyes, burning their swirling grey into his memory.

"You're still leaving? Why?"

"From the moment I've met you you've pushed me to be a better man. You've taught me how to not only see the best in others but the best in myself. That is a gift that I'll cherish for the rest of my days. But you deserve to be in the light. To walk in the sun. I can't give that to you."

"You're leaving because you think it's what's best for me? Why won't you let me decide what's best for me!"

"I'm over 200 years old. I've seen things and done things that would make evil men shiver. You need to live life, not be attached to an animated corpse. I love you Alandra. With my entire soul. So this is my gift to you," he finished telling her. Alandra ran into his arms, kissing him deeply. Angel took comfort in her arms, relishing his last moments with her.

"I'll always be watching over you Alandra. I love you, my heart," Angel whispered against her lips. Alandra reluctantly released him, unable to hold back the sobs as she watched Angel step off her porch. He could feel her eyes buried in his back as he walked away, his steps slow as he questioned his own decision, but he knew it was the correct one. She need to live life, and that was something he couldn't give her.

_She is the Storm. She will rave and ravage. The Storm is powerful. She must remain in the sun to walk along the night. The spear is where her power lies. Two knights, two champions. The protector of the Hell Mouth._


	22. The Spear Chapter 1

Alandra had left Sunnydale for a while. It held too many memories, too much pain for her. Angel was gone, and she wanted to say she was stronger than to let a man break her. To be overcome with grief from his loss because everyone expects that. They all just expect her to be ok with him leaving because of who she is and who he is and their past, but she can't. It was beyond love. He was a part of her. He held a piece of her soul within him, and she held a piece of his soul within her. And he just left. He decided what was best for the both of them with out talking to her about it, and that made her enraged and left her heart broken. It showed her that despite everything they had been through together he still couldn't trust her judgment. Now the only ones that seem to understand or at least sympathize with her was Buffy and Willow. Cordelia left and Faith was in a coma. Alandra felt alone again, and she hated it.

~0~0~

Alandra finally returned to Sunnydale after a couple of months of being gone. She sighed as she opened the front door to the cold and empty house that had been her home for the past couple of years. Her father had tried to convince her to stay with him, but she knew she couldn't. Even beyond the horrible memories LA held for her, and now Angel's presence there, she felt like she was doing something important in Sunnydale. She felt like she mattered even though she knew she didn't. She knew that she was a small pawn in the game of life that she was living, but as long as she felt like she mattered that's all she needed.

Once Alandra placed her suitcase back into her room she stepped out of the house to walk around the town. It was still daytime so Alandra didn't feel as on guard as she would normally be. She just allowed her mind to wander at all of the things she needed to do. She wasn't going to school which meant she would need to find a job as soon as possible. Fortunately her father had some contacts in Sunnydale so she wasn't too worried.

She allowed her feet carry her and she found herself standing just outside the mansion on Crawford Street. Alandra could feel her pain shoot through her heart. It was a prison that had become her second home, and now it was just a shell of memories. Tears began to well into her eyes, slowly spilling down her cheeks as she clenched her hands into fists. Her whole body shook with anger and sadness and she didn't know how to let go. She could feel it eating her up inside, and she knew that Angel could feel it as well. She wanted to be stronger than she was. To at least let go enough so that the mere thought of his shadow wouldn't bring her to her knees but she wasn't that strong. She couldn't let Angel go. She couldn't escape the image of his back as he walked away and she hated herself for it.

Alandra sucked in a breath, releasing it in a scream. She didn't care if someone saw her and thought she was crazy. She needed to release her pain somehow and that was her best way. When her vocal chords became too raw for anymore sound she turned around and ran. Her legs felt heavy as she ran down the streets to the next place she could think of. She slowed down to a stop and found she was in front of the Summers' home. She didn't know why she wanted to see Buffy, but her heart told her that it was the right choice. She slowly walked up the front steps, nervousness etching in. Her and Buffy were never friends, no matter how much they settled things between them, but Alandra knew that Buffy was the only one who would understand what she was going through in a way. They both loved the same man at one point, and he left them both at one point.

Alandra slowly walked up the steps, her breath in her chest. She lifted her fist to knock on the door and jumped when it flew open, Buffy yelling to her mom her goodbyes. Buffy jumped as well when she realized someone was standing on her door step. Alandra's eyes were wide, her hand still in the air.

"Alandra," Buffy said, surprised by the girl's presence, "You're back!"

"Yeah, I am," Alandra replied, lowering her hand finally. The silence was awkward as they waited for the other to say something else. Buffy shifted her feet, making Alandra realize that she had been silent for too long.

"Buffy," Alandra began, drawing the girl's attention to her, "I know we've never been friends. But," Alandra's voice became choked with emotion, tears springing to her eyes, "But, I could really use a friend right now."

"Of course," Buffy said, nodding in understanding, "Let's go to my dorm. We'll talk when we get there."

"Ok," Alandra replied, taking a deep breath in relief. Some of the weight was lifting off of her already.

~0~0~

"Your dorm room is cute," Alandra told her, walking into the room with a small amount of awe and jealousy.

"Thanks. My roommate should be gone for a while, so feel free to let go," Buffy told her, plopping down onto her bed. Alandra followed her, her movement more controlled as she sat beside the blonde. Buffy waited patiently for Alandra to start and could see the emotions running all over her face. She looked tired, dark shadows under her eyes, her usually glowing brown skin now tinged grey. Angel's absence was taking a toll on Alandra and she wondered if they even knew it.

"It feels weird to be talking to you about this but I don't think the others would understand what I was going through, or even want to," Alandra told her, a small smile on her lips, "Xander and Giles still haven't forgiven for what happened to you I think."

"I'll talk to them about that. They shouldn't be blaming you for anything," Buffy told her, making Alandra shake her head.

"It's fine. I'm kind of done with trying to prove myself to people, to Xander, even to Giles. They need someone to be angry with, and nothing you say will change that," Alandra told Buffy who nodded in acquiescence, but Alandra could tell that she was hesitant about it. Alandra fell silent again, taking deep and slow breaths to calm her emotions down, but it wasn't working.

"How did you do it Buffy? How did you let go of Angel? Because despite everything I do I can't seem to let him go," Alandra told her, her sobs finally being released from her body. Buffy wrapped her arms around her, holding Alandra to her and trying to comfort her the best she could.

"I loved Angel," Buffy began, "I still do. But what you two have is more powerful than any love I've ever seen. You carry each other within you and even though it hurt to watch you with him, to know that you held his heart, his very being, I knew it from the start that you were who he was meant to be with. From the moment I saw you two standing together, side by side, I could feel the spark between you."

"If we were so meant to be. If you could tell from the moment we were together that we were supposed to be with each other then why did he leave me? Why did he suddenly decide that I was better off without him? I can feel myself falling apart inside," Alandra cried out, tears streaming down her face.

"I wish I was stronger than this," Alandra told her, "Strong enough to pretend that him leaving me alone again hasn't broken me inside. I don't know how much more of this I can take."

"Alandra look at me," Buffy commanded, when she didn't Buffy grabbed her by the chin and forced her to look into Buffy's eyes, "You are strong. You've been through so much and you've bounced back. You fought through it, and you'll fight through this. You'll get through this, and I'll be here to help you." Not knowing what to say, Alandra broke down into tears again, allowing herself to feel the pain she was trying to hide.

~0~0~

It had been about a week since her crying session with Buffy and Alandra felt no lighter than she did before. She still carried the weight around with her and it was crushing her.

She had been alone in her house, wondering what to do next when Buffy told her to come to Giles's home. She was nervousness, she hadn't seen the older man since before she had left and she didn't know how she would be received by him. She had barely reached the door when Buffy threw the door open and dragged her inside.

"Alandra," Willow cheerfully cried out, running over to her and wrapping her in a warm hug. Alandra took a small amount of peace being hugged by her friend brought, but it immediately disappeared at the sound of Xander's voice.

"What is she doing here," Xander asked, clearly offended by her presence. She felt Buffy move beside her, and looked over at the blonde, a determined look on her face.

"She is a Scooby. She's going to help us with what's been going on. That's why she's here," Buffy told him. Xander opened his mouth to argue but Willow stopped him.

"What's been going on," Alandra asked, her brows furrowing in confusion. Buffy turned to her to look her in the eyes.

"Spike is back and he's digging under the city for a thing called the Jewel of Amara," Buffy told her. Alandra pushed down her thoughts about Spike and focusing on what he was looking for.

"What is the Jewel of Amara," Alandra asked Buffy, but Giles was the one who answered.

"Originally believed to be a myth, even amongst the demon community, it basically makes any vampire that wears it invincible. They can walk in the sun, holy water has no affect on them," Giles listed off, and Alandra finished his sentence for him.

"And they can't be staked. And Spike will do a lot of damage once he gets his hands on it. So, what's the plan," Alandra asked them.

"We find Spike and stop him from getting the Jewel," Buffy told her, "I'm going to have to stake him this time. I'm sorry Alandra." When she heard those words Alandra wanted to fight her on it. Spike was her friend. He saved her from herself, and she wanted to protect him, to save him. But she knew what Spike was. He was evil and he wouldn't hesitate to kill anyone of them, not even her if it really came down to it.

"It's fine Buffy," Alandra told her, her voice sounding empty, her eyes becoming cloudy with regret and sadness, "Do what you have to do." Alandra turned around and walked out, leaving the others in her wake.

"Is she ok," Willow asked Buffy, clearly worried about the other girl, but Xander had cut in to the conversation.

"Maybe she feels guilty about what she let Angel did to Buffy and for being friends with Faith, as she should be," Xander said, his voice full of anger and hate.

"If I hear one more word about what happened Xander I will hit you," Buffy threatened, "I told you that she had nothing to do with that, and you blaming her is becoming ridiculous. And if I remember correctly, you thought Faith could be saved as well. Enough is enough. Let it go," Buffy finished. She could tell that her words didn't reach him, but she said nothing else. It would be wasted breath and they didn't have time for that.

"I'm still going to the party tonight. I'll take Alandra with me. Maybe that'll cheer her up a bit. Let me know if you guys find anything more about Spike," Buffy said, grabbing her jacket and purse. Giles nodded, removing his glassing to clean them.

"I'll let you know if anything comes up," Giles told her. Buffy nodded and stepped out, hoping to find Alandra quickly.

~0~0~

Alandra didn't know what she was doing at the party. Buffy was trying to include her in the festivities but was too wrapped up in the guy named Parker to really pay attention. Now Alandra was sitting alone in a corner of the living room, watching college students of various ages drink and dance and talk to each other. Her thoughts were being drawn back to Angel every time she saw a couple together. She began to imagine that it was Angel and her there together, having no business at the party at all but there any way because she thought it would be fun. And he would go because he wanted to see her have fun. As her imaginings became deeper and felt more real she shook her head, and saw the images fall away into mist. She was in her own mind so much that she barely registered Buffy running after a blonde man through the house.

Alandra jumped to her feet, immediately following after them, ignoring the angry calls after her as she bumped into various party patrons to reach the outside. She nearly crashed into Buffy as they came to a stop, the Slayer facing the vampire.

"Well hello there luv," Spike said to Alandra, a smug smirk on his face.

"What are you doing here Spike," Alandra asked, moving to stand beside Buffy, her arms crossing her chest and waiting for his answer.

"Just passing through. Needed to pick up a bite to eat but now we'll be on our merry way," Spike said, but Buffy pulled a stake out of her leather jacket, halting Spike in his footsteps.

"We know you're looking for the Jewel of Amara. Have you found it yet," Buffy asked him, but Harmony was the one to respond behind them.

"No, he's still looking for it," Harmony's light voice carried over to them, making them whirl around to look at her.

"Harm," Spike yelled in anger before lifting his fists up and ready for a fight.

"Come on Alandra luv," Spike said to her, drawing her attention back to him. Crystal blue met grey and Spike immediately knew that something had happened to her. Her eyes weren't vibrant any more. They were dull and lifeless. He began to wonder what had happened to her to draw her back to the darkness she was in during her captivity.

"What do you want me to do Spike," Alandra asked him, guilt filling her heart. But her face was stone, hiding everything she was feeling.

"Help me to not get staked would be bloody fantastic," Spike replied. He was confused by the way she was treating him. Where there was once warmth, now there was nothing.

"You said it yourself Spike. You're evil. And evil things must be destroyed," Alandra told him coldly. Spike was taken aback by her words but said nothing. He glared at her, his teeth grinding in anger. Alandra spun around and walked away, leaving the grunts and groans of fighting behind her.


End file.
